I know, I can, I am.

In this era of "me too", I find myself questioning the reasons why my daughter has to 'be polite'. Obviously, politeness is one of the foundations of functioning in a productive community. But enforcing politeness to the point of policing politeness can have detrimental effects. Our children learn to respond politely when they might be better off saying no. Or they remain silent in the face of bullying rather than shouting back or speaking up.

This conflict within me, of teaching my daughter to be polite but also making sure that she knows how to be her own advocate, connects with the work that I do in schools focusing on conceptual curriculums. The International Baccalaureate's conceptual framework pushes teachers to develop units of learning that support conceptual understandings and skills, not just a laundry list of facts, places, people and events. Students and teachers in the IB community are also guided by the Learner Profile, 10 attributes that learners develop to help them become caring, engaged and responsible global citizens.

Some schools from more traditional knowledge-centred backgrounds, struggle to connect all these pieces. How do they put together the IB learner profile, approaches to learning (skills), concepts and knowledge in one curriculum? What's the link between them all? It's answering these questions that I find myself circling back to what I mean when I'm teaching my daughter how to be polite.

Being polite is knowledge but being able to communicate in an appropriate way is connected with concepts and skills. What's appropriate in one setting may not be in another. You have to have a conceptual understanding of communication in order to respond effectively in different settings.

As well as a conceptual understanding of communication, students have to have the necessary skills. This could be language but could also be hand gestures, tone, pitch, word choice, use of visuals, speaking on the telephone, talking in front of an audience or giving a demonstration. All of these skills make up Approaches to Learning in the IB programmes. The connection between knowledge, concepts and skills leads to students developing their IB learner profile attribute; in this example, 'communicator'.

As I reflect on these connections, I'll continue to remind my daughter to be polite, and also help her to develop the skills and understanding of many other ways to communicate depending on her needs and on the situation.