I heard you were tired of avoiding the hard conversations....

Asking your Employees the Hard Questions While maintaining the Relationship...

Now that's a balancing act.

As a leader, you are constantly balancing the tension between what employees needs and what the business needs.

It's kind of walking a tight rope with a whole lot of chaos to manage when you misstep.

This chaos shows up as...

?? Sacrificed team productivity due to avoiding crucial issues that are impacting performance

?? Unpleasant emotional reactions and behind the scenes employee chatter spreading from feedback gone wrong

?? Decreasing employee engagement productivity because of their perceptions they hold of you and of the organization (either because of a perceived laissez-faire attitude or the tough love is leaving them resentful)

So today, I want to highlight 3 key components so that you can eliminate those missteps and walk into your next conversation feeling confident to ask the hard questions worth exploring.

(As you go through these components, allow your imagination to create a picture of what would improvement in this area look like for you)

1?? Trusting Environment

Facilitating a trusting environment is crucial to creating psychological safety...

and paving the way for transparency & honesty.

Without this you won't have a productive conversation and the hard questions aren't worth asking (because you won't get the real answers anyway).

The willingness to have an open, transparent & honest conversation depends on how they trust you, this situation, the players in this situation and this organization.

You can't depend on transparency and honesty to build trust!

So instead tap into what the person in front of you needs to feel, hear, see or know in order to feel comfortable engaging in this conversation with you.

2?? Lean into Emotions

We can all stop pretending we can leave emotions out of it ??

Emotions are messages from the brain to the behavioral system to steer people towards what they want (and avoid the things they don't want)

Emotions drive people.

So if you are dealing with behavior...

Look at what's underneath --> Emotions

AND what's underneath emotions, are wants and needs.

When emotions come up in the conversation, it means you are approaching something important for this person.

It's time to dig deeper.

? But don't get stuck in the emotions

?? Instead explore the reason the emotion is happening, the perceptions, the wants and the needs behind it.

3?? Practice Balancing the Agendas

Within a business setting, there are always multiple agendas in play...

?? The employee's needs, wants and individual goals

?? Your team's needs, missions and shared-goals

?? As the Leader, your leadership goals as well as your responsibilities towards your team & the organization

?? The business' expectations, policies, visions, strategic goals

?? And any other stakeholders in this situation

I use the word "Practice" because balancing these agenda is not one action, but intentionally weaving them together in every action.

So instead of going with your agenda or the business agenda...

?? Stay focused on exploring your employees' agenda because it's key to changing the behavior

?? Weave the other agenda's into the conversation by providing necessary information AS NEEDED

(pro tip: make a list of important agenda's & key information that would be relevant to the employee or the reason for this conversation... avoid generalities or blanket statements... be specific & factual)

?? Evoke new awareness through questions that help you and your employee connect the dots.

? As a Leader you see the bigger picture, don't assume your employee does... It's your responsibility in management to see and convey the bigger picture.

? You don't see everything going on inside your employee such as their thoughts, feelings, beliefs, values, needs and wants... Or even what they do when you are not around. Stop assuming you know and put your curiosity hat on.

These 3 key components of your conversations with employees will change how you ask those hard questions and how effective it will be at changing your employees behavior.

Personally, my superpower as a coach is leaning into the emotions, unpacking them and leading people through a powerful process of transformation that gives lasting results (while honoring agendas in play).

The game changer --> Building my Trust Facilitation skills

It has allowed me to...

? Tap into the subtleties inside every interactions.

? Recognize the flow of trust between people as it moves, increase & decreases.

? Hear what's really being said.. Understanding beyond words that that the employee is choosing to share.

? Stay employee-centered (as I'm balancing various stakeholder agendas).

If you are leading people and want to know how you can build up your own trust facilitation skills so you can level up your coaching skills as a leader...

There's an BIG exciting opportunity for you if you book your call to learn more about The Executive Edge! ??

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