I have to earn that cake

Recently I met someone I know at a local coffee shop. She ordered a coffee and I ordered a coffee and a lovely piece of bread pudding. Being well brought up I did offer her some, but she looked slightly horrified and said, “I don’t eat cake”. Of course, I was interested to know: was it cake in general, the cake I had chosen or something else. She said she didn’t allow herself lots of things because she always felt guilty afterwards. We then started to discuss this because I understand this guilt, and the feelings of failure or panic that used to be part of this. I’d be on a diet, with a long list of things I wasn’t allowed and a much shorter list of things I was allowed. I would eat something from the ‘not allowed’ list, or as I called it ‘the good stuff’. Then I’d think “Well you’ve blown it, as always, might as well eat anything you can pick up, because you are a failure”.

This has all changed. I have spent time working out how I can lose weight on my terms, where everything is allowed, including the good stuff and I am responsible for managing and balancing my food intake. It has been a huge learning curve, not least dealing with my thought processes and it has not been a “Well that’s all sorted—tick!” kind of process. More a tick, “Oops, flipping ‘heck!”, then regroup and move towards another tick. I forgive myself, because I am a human with a history of a poor relationship with food. But I don’t give up on myself. The ‘regroup’ tends to be giving myself a good talking to and then moving forward again.

If you have read any of my last few blogs, you will know that the latest ‘talking to’ has been length—and sometimes brutal—but it has continued until I started to really listen. I know I can do this, because I have done it before but not absolutely. Many times: as I have learnt, managed, reviewed, changed behaviour and so on. Once again it has worked. I am absolutely back on track, for now! I am sure I will need to regroup again at some point but that is all part of my plan.

And my friend? We are going to have a coffee again and, in the meantime, she is going to look at the first of my workbooks and make her own decisions about her plan. It might be, of course, that she decides to continue with her existing plan and doesn’t allow herself cake, but maybe not.

So, and to be direct: can I help to support you with your weight loss? Go to: Steps to success and get my free download.

Have fun.

Glenys