I Hate What Tipping Has Become!

Imagine the following scenario:

Scenario 1: You’re walking into a restaurant and across the street, you see a homeless person. You decide to buy an extra meal, and on the way out you hand the meal to the person. How does that make you feel? Hold on to that feeling.        

Scenario 2: Now, imagine you walk into the same restaurant and, after ordering, the owner puts a gun to your head and says, “You need to buy the person across the street a meal.” How does that make you feel? Probably not so good. Why?        

In the first scenario, you had agency. YOU decided to be generous. Giving or helping in this case gave you pleasure in exchange for helping someone—a true win-win.

In the second scenario, you had no agency. You were coerced into giving. There was no pleasure in the act since you had no choice; you were forced to comply—a clear lose-win. You lose, the homeless person wins.

And this is why I hate what tipping has become today!

In the past, tipping was for when someone went above and beyond their job description or the food was exceptional beyond expectations. A tip was a financial signal to the server/restaurant that you really enjoyed the dining experience.

Today, tipping is much like the restaurant owner holding a gun to your head and coercing you to give a tip, sometimes before you’ve even been served or tasted the food. The only difference is that the restaurant owner has replaced the gun with a point-of-sale (POS) credit card machine. You are being 'guilted' into tipping, which in the end gives you no pleasure and leaves you feeling manipulated.

Let me be clear: I’m not against tipping. I’m against forced tipping (i.e., tip included automatically regardless of food quality or service) or being guilted into tipping by an inanimate object (i.e., POS machine).

Back in the day, you had to earn the tip; it wasn’t a guarantee. I’m old enough to remember when tipping was 10%. It then inched up to 15%. Now we’re at 20%. But the insanity continues! I’ve seen POS machines with these options: 20% - 22% - 25%! I can easily imagine a future when tips will be 25% minimum with the following options: 25% - 27% - 30%!

What’s worse is that if you want to give a lower amount for a tip (e.g., 10%), the POS machines have added ‘friction’ to make it harder. You have three choices of tips, and if you don’t like the choices, you can click on CUSTOM. Now, you have to do math to give someone money they may or may not have earned, all the while under the judgmental eye of the cashier/server staring at you, wondering if you’re ‘one of those people.’

Now, before you get upset and say, “Tips are used to supplement the employee’s income,” let me counter with this: “Put it in the price of the meal!” The menu prices should reflect the total cost of doing business (i.e., including employee salary/benefits) and a profit for the business.

Okay, still not buying my point of view? Tell me if you’re okay with the following scenarios:

? I go into Best Buy to buy a TV, and when I go to pay for the item, someone shows me a POS machine with three tip options, even though no one helped me select the TV.

? I go to the grocery store, and when checking out, I’m asked to provide a tip even though I did all the legwork.

? I go to the gym to work out, and at the end of the month, I’m asked to provide a tip.

I could go on with more ridiculous scenarios, but you get the idea. The employee’s salary and benefits are rolled up into the price of the TV, groceries, or gym membership!

I can hear you saying, “Yes, but a restaurant is all about the ambiance and dining experience.” To which I would reply, so are all the aforementioned scenarios.

Still not convinced? Let’s remove the ambiance and the dine-in experience. I went to a sandwich shop the other day, and upon checkout, they used the POS machine to offer me three tip options. For what? Preparing the sandwich! That’s their job!

Last example. I’m a professional speaker and sales trainer. Can you imagine after delivering a keynote or workshop I asked the hiring company for a tip? How would that go over? Not well! There’s an agreed-upon price; nothing beyond that. My cost of doing business was rolled into the price! No tip is expected or necessary!

Rant over!

To be clear; I don’t mind tipping! I do tip! I WANT to enjoy the act of tipping!

That said, tipping should NOT be an obligation but a voluntary act of appreciation for a great dining experience.

No one should be guilted or manipulated into giving. Instead, 'Dear Business Owners,' why not strive to exceed consumer expectations so that patrons will (a) want to leave a tip voluntarily, (b) want to come back, and (c) tell their friends about how great your restaurant is?

I hate what tipping has become!

Your thoughts?