I got stuck in my story...
Photography by Firechild

I got stuck in my story...

My Nanna Connolly passed away before I was born. I grew up in her home surrounded by all of her neighbours. Apparently she was a force to be reckoned with. She sounded absolutely amazing. The company she kept was amazing too because long after she had passed one of her friends who lived across the road, Mrs. Gorman used to call me and say 'Young Connolly girl, come over here to me & tell me how you are?' I would tell her how I was & we would walk to the shop together & chat. She always told me my Nanna, her pal, would be very proud of me. This filled me up with joy.

She was a straight talker & took no messing. I loved her. I liked her direct approach. I looked forward to spending time with her every now & then. I always spoke with my phone voice when I was with her. She made me want to be a better person.

When I grew up & became an adult she called me one day & said 'Young Connolly come over here & tell me how you are?' At the time I was married about two years & had only just become a Mum. Financially things were very tight & my son was born with a rare illness. I was struggling. I told her how I was. I did a lot of complaining. I focused on all of the negatives.

Mrs. Gorman said 'Hold on a minute here young Connolly. WHO SAID it was going to be easy!??? Who said that!!? No one ever said it was going to be easy. You have to work. You have to work hard!!! Yes your son is sick. At least you have a son, he will get better'. You can always earn money in the future.

Well...

shut

my

mouth.

I don't know what I expected, but I wasn't expecting that! I should have known better. She took the wind out of my sails with my complaints & gave me a smack of 'COP ON' all in one sitting!!! Mrs. Gorman wasn't being harsh, she wasn't disinterested or rude. Mrs. Gorman truly cared about me. She gave me exactly what I needed in that moment because she saw I was getting 'stuck in my story' & if she had of fluffed around me & said 'there there pet things will get better' I wouldn't have dug deep after her kick in the arse and kiss on the cheel to find the resilience I needed to get through that time in my life.

Thank you Mrs. Gorman from the bottom of my heart for giving me perspective (as usual!) and put manners on me. I needed it as I was going down a dark hole at the time. You showed me through your action the value of working hard to achieve my dreams & more. Even though you are passed you are still teaching me.

Has anyone ever had this long lasting impact on you? I would love to know about it.

'No one said it would be easy - they just said it would be worth it' - Mrs.Gorman, Edemore true and true.

Carmel McCarthy

Making workplaces safer with Health and Safety advice and training - the 'Yang' director in EMS & Associates

5 个月

The people of that era were philosophers and they didn’t know it. When I’d get in a tizzy over something my father would ask “is anyone sick? No! Is anyone dead? No! Well then there isn’t a problem”. If I feel myself getting stressed over something, I breathe, reflect on his words, and then deal with it.

Liz Dillon

Author - Inspirational Speaker

4 年

Nicola. This is one of the best pieces I have read in quite a while.

Lynsey Hanratty

Business Operations Coordinator | Business and Mindset Coach for female entrepreneurs

4 年

We all need a Mrs. Gorman in our lives, how very lucky you were to have her! ??

Hazel Cole (ACC)

A dynamic and innovative ICF Associate Certified Coach and Customer Success Leader

4 年

Love that Nicola Connolly-Byrne. I have always been able to count on my mother for a "dose" of straight talking when necessary. I remember ringing her in floods of tears a few days after moving to France as part of my Uni course. I was complaining about the room I was living in and telling her that the landlady was horrible. I'm sure I was hoping for a "if you are not happy love, come home", but instead got a "put on your big girl pants and do what you went there to do...and you might never complain about your mother again!!" Tough love, ?? ?? but just what was required, I went on to have the most amazing year! We all need someone in our lives that can be relied on to give it to us straight!

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