I "Get" To Do This | Stoic Saturdays

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” ―Marcus Aurelius

Life is full of obligations. Wake up early. Go to work. Exercise. Pay bills. Clean the house. At first glance, these tasks feel like burdens, things we have to do. But shift the perspective ever so slightly, and the same tasks become privileges—things we get to do. This subtle change in language carries profound implications. It transforms obligation into gratitude, frustration into fulfillment. The way we frame our responsibilities determines whether we see our days as tedious routines or as opportunities to engage with life.

Gratitude Through a Stoic Lens

Stoic philosophy teaches that perception shapes reality. Marcus Aurelius, a Roman emperor and philosopher, once wrote, “The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.” If the mind fixates on inconvenience, then life appears burdensome. But if the mind finds meaning in daily tasks, then even the mundane becomes purposeful. The difference between resentment and gratitude is not circumstance—it’s mindset.

Imagine two people waking up at 5 AM. One groans, “I have to go to work.” The other stretches and says, “I get to go to work.” The first dreads the commute, the meetings, the emails. The second acknowledges that employment provides financial stability, a sense of purpose, and a means to support loved ones. The job is the same. The attitude is not.

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has." —Epictetus

Reframing Everyday Responsibilities

Consider a common complaint: exercise.

One person says, “I have to work out.” They view it as a chore, something to check off a list. Another says, “I get to work out.” They recognize that not everyone has the ability. Some are confined to hospital beds, wishing for the strength to run, lift, or move freely. Health is fleeting, and movement is a gift. Today’s workout is tomorrow’s nostalgia. There will come a time when the body no longer functions as it once did. To move without pain, to exert energy, to breathe deeply—these are privileges, not burdens.

Now think about housework.

Dishes pile up. Laundry overflows. The bathroom needs scrubbing. It’s easy to say, “I have to clean.” But what does that really mean? It means there’s food to eat, clothes to wear, and a roof overhead. Many people live without clean water, without a home, without basic comforts. Instead of resenting the mess, one can appreciate the conditions that create it. “I get to clean” means there is something worth cleaning. It is proof of abundance.

"People are not disturbed by things, but by the views they take of them." —Epictetus

Work, Money, and the Privilege of Earning

Nothing fuels resentment like employment. Early mornings. Endless emails. Annoying coworkers. “I have to go to work,” people grumble. But jobs, even the frustrating ones, provide something essential: income, structure, skills, a sense of purpose.

Imagine someone unemployed, searching for work, struggling to make ends meet. For them, a job—any job—feels like salvation. Bills paid. Food on the table. Stability. The phrase “I get to go to work” acknowledges that employment is not guaranteed. It is not a curse but a lifeline. Complaining about a job while cashing its paycheck is a contradiction. Even if a job is not ideal, it is a stepping stone. A means to an end.

Errands, Chores, and Daily Responsibilities

Grocery shopping is another task that people begrudge. The long lines, the crowded aisles, the rising prices—it’s easy to say, “I have to go grocery shopping.” But consider the alternative: food insecurity. Some people rely on food banks. Others go to bed hungry. The ability to walk into a store, choose fresh produce, and leave with bags full of food is not a chore—it’s a luxury. The slight inconvenience of shopping pales in comparison to true scarcity. “I get to buy food” is a recognition that access to nourishment is not universal.

Even paying bills—something universally disliked—can be reframed. Electricity, water, internet, rent, insurance—each bill represents something essential. A lit home. A warm shower. A connection to the world. Someone struggling financially would love the ability to pay bills without stress. “I get to pay bills” is not about romanticizing expenses but about recognizing that financial obligations mean financial ability.

The Stoic Art of Choosing Perspective

Stoicism does not ask people to deny hardship. It does not demand forced positivity. It simply asks: What is within my control? One thing always within control is perspective. The words chosen to describe life’s responsibilities shape how they are experienced.

When people say, “I have to,” they position themselves as victims of circumstance. Life becomes something that happens to them. But when they say, “I get to,” they reclaim agency. They acknowledge that responsibilities are privileges in disguise.

No one is entitled to good health, stable employment, or a home. These things can disappear in an instant. The Stoic recognizes that misfortune waits for no one. Illness, injury, job loss—these are not distant possibilities but inevitabilities for many. Therefore, while one has health, work, shelter, and purpose, they should not take them for granted.

Applying the Shift in Daily Life

This mindset shift is simple but powerful. Before complaining, pause. Ask: What am I really saying?

Instead of “I have to wake up early,” try “I get to wake up early.” Some never wake up at all. Instead of “I have to cook dinner,” try “I get to cook dinner.” Some have no food to prepare. Instead of “I have to go to the gym,” try “I get to go to the gym.” Some would give anything for one more chance to move freely.

A shift in language leads to a shift in perspective. A shift in perspective leads to a shift in experience. The Stoics understood that life is fleeting, unpredictable, and fragile. What seems mundane today will one day be missed. What feels like a burden now may later be recognized as a blessing. The wise person does not wait until loss to appreciate what was once theirs. They see it now. They say, I get to—and they mean it.