I Forgive

"It is much bigger to forgive than to carry the burden of blame and to move on," Kumu Sabra Kauka, a Hawai’ian elder, historian, educator, and activist notes. "Because only by forgiving and moving on can you reach a higher point."

My husband and I first visited Oahu, Hawai’i in 2013 during my time with the iconic acoustic guitar manufacturer C.F. Martin & Co. (Martin Guitar). Our love for Hawaii deepened as Martin sponsored Surfer Magazine's annual award ceremony, Surfer Poll Awards, held in Oahu every December in conjunction with the Vans Triple Crown and Billabong Pipeline Masters competition. Hawaii became our happy place, where good vibes filled each day, and we made many dear friends. Mahalo.

The people of Hawai’i embody beauty in every way - their love for Ohana, their faith, the stunning land, and their rich culture resonate the moment you set foot on the shore.

Recently, my dear friend, Chief Founding Guide and member of my personal Board of Directors, Mary Stephenson, shared with me a meditation practice for forgiveness called Ho’oponopono. I was deeply moved by it and felt compelled to share it with you, hoping it resonates with someone today.

The word Ho’oponopono roughly translates to "cause things to move back in balance" or "make things right." In the native Hawaiian language, "pono" means balance, in the sense of "life."

Chanting the meditative phrase over and over can be a powerful way to cleanse the body of guilt, shame, haunting memories, ill will, or negative thoughts that keep the mind fixated.

According to the Mayo Clinic, letting go of grudges and bitterness can pave the way for improved health and peace of mind. Forgiveness can lead to:

• Healthier relationships
• Improved mental health
• Reduced anxiety, stress, and hostility
• Fewer symptoms of depression
• Lower blood pressure
• A stronger immune system
• Improved heart health
• Enhanced self-esteem

As a woman of faith, I firmly believe in the power of forgiveness. Unforgiveness is like drinking poison; it only hurts you. But let's be honest, forgiveness is easier said than done. It requires practice, patience, and humility, among other virtues. Forgiveness also doesn’t mean forgetting.

In the practice of Ho’oponopono, you must first acknowledge that wrongdoing exists. Only then can you find it in your heart to forgive yourself or others. In the final step, acknowledge love - both for yourself and others.

My journey with forgiveness became tangible when I consciously chose to release the weight tied to things, people, feelings, places, and spaces that no longer serve me. In time and with great patience, I chose to forgive myself and others and to move forward with grace and love. As Mary explained, "True forgiveness requires both attention and intention. When done correctly, it is one of the most freeing sensations there is." Sage advice for the weary-hearted.

To practice Ho’oponopono, take a few deep breaths with your eyes closed. Then, slowly repeat these phrases to yourself about 7 or 8 times:

I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you.

When you're ready, try this practice. End with a few moments of silence to let the message resonate. Open your eyes. How do you feel?

Go forth, my Muse, and be great. I am rooting for you, always.

Musically yours,

Amani D.