I Don’t Get No Respect
By Dan Harkey
Remember Rodney Dangerfield, an American stand-up comedian, actor, producer, screenwriter, and author. ?He became famous for his self-deprecating one-liner humor. ?He became famous for his humor about “I don’t get no respect.”? He had other great one-liners:
·????? “My wife and I were happy for twenty years, then we met.”
·????? ?I know how to make a girl say, ‘Yes.’ I ask her, ‘Am I bothering you?’
·????? “I get no respect. ?The way my luck is running, if I were a politician, I would be honest,”
·????? “My psychiatrist told me I was crazy, and I said I wanted a second opinion.? He said okay, you’re ugly too.”
Everyone wants to talk about respect—Aretha Franklin's original “Respect”
Even Bob Dylan with “Dignity”
Dignity and respect are part of your heritage and culture. Interactions with others are regular parts of your daily life. The way you treat others reflects what is going on in your mind.
Dignity, a person’s inherent worth and value, is a universal state of being that exists within all of us, regardless of our differences.? It is earned through our words, thoughts, actions, and values and is fundamental to our humanity.
As individuals, we play a significant role in upholding the dignity of our fellow human beings. Our words and actions have a profound impact on others. Failing to treat others respectfully can extinguish trust and dignity in our interactions.
Respect is showing consideration or worthiness of others.
Showing dignity and respect to others is not just a matter of common cultural courtesy; it’s fundamental to any respectful and dignified society. ??Our actions can inspire others to show respect and contribute to a more dignified society.
Outside forces such as religion, political leaning, social strata, convention, and norms sometimes affect this equation.? How do we treat rich people, poor people, special needs people, religious, non-religious, anti-vaxed people, fat people, older people, and others with various qualities that appear to be unique? ?For instance, respecting a person with special needs could involve being patient and understanding, while respecting someone from a different religion could include being open-minded and tolerant. ?For example, when interacting with a person with special needs, you can show respect by being patient and understanding their unique challenges.
When engaging with someone from a different religion, we should show respect by being open-minded and tolerant of their beliefs. ?Similarly, when interacting with someone from a different social stratum, we can show respect by acknowledging their achievements and treating them as equals. ?Ask them questions and listen. ?For instance, when dealing with a potential client from a different social stratum, we can show respect by acknowledging their success and asking about their business needs rather than assuming they know what’s best for them. ?This could involve asking about their business goals, understanding their challenges, and proposing solutions that align with their needs. It's about understanding their perspective and showing empathy, which can go a long way in building a respectful sales relationship.
Tribal social instincts affect the equation. ?These instincts can manifest in various ways, such as a perception that a subset is chosen as god’s favored children or that their religion and God figures are better than others. ?Therefore, some may feel that they are better.? Some may think they are better than those who do not subscribe to their emotions and cognitive mechanisms (how our brain processes activities of perception, learning, memory, thinking, and consciousness).
All the above is filtered through our frame of reference and influences how we treat others, including in sales relationships. ?For instance, if you believe that your product or service is superior to others, this belief may influence how you interact with potential clients, potentially leading to disrespectful behavior if they don’t immediately see the value you see. This rude behavior can manifest in various ways, such as dismissing their concerns, interrupting them, or speaking condescendingly. It's important to remember that respect is a two-way street, and disrespectful behavior can have severe consequences in sales relationships.
As we navigate our day, we must remember that treating others with dignity and respect requires a conscious effort.? Our actions can significantly contribute to fostering a culture of mutual respect, and we can stand tall as giving and sensitive individuals. ?This conscious effort is a clear sign of our engagement and commitment to this cause, and it is this commitment that will lead to a more respectful society.
How does this relate to a salesperson?? When salespeople are treated with overt disrespect and indignity, they should try the soft approach and extend a hand of friendship. ?I have had relationships that started with short, condescending, and aloof people, and I was able to turn them around. ?If that does not work, it may be necessary to disengage from the lead or discontinue active marketing. ?This disengagement, which I refer to as the ‘big D’ approach, Should only be considered when the salesperson is sure the lead is uninterested in working with you in the future. ?The ‘big D’ approach involves politely disengaging the lead so that you will no longer pursue the business relationship due to their disrespectful behavior.
A few prospective and failed budding relationships are not worth the abuse. ?It’s like trying to date a sociopath; it will never work.
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The salesperson has three types of lead interfaces:
·????? As salespersons, our diligent efforts to develop many relationships where mutual respect is key can significantly impact our success. ?These relationships, built on familiarity, trust, and shared values, are the seeds that grow into solid business connections. ?Regular personal contact is crucial to nurturing these relationships and fostering a culture of respect and trust.
The salesperson’s job is to develop ongoing friendships and mutual respect, which increases the probability of referring business back and forth. ?It is also helpful to assist others in promoting their business. ?For instance, we can share their posts on social media, recommend services to our network, or even collaborate on a project.
·????? The business motive should be understood if we are soliciting or communicating with someone who may or may not be interested in our services or have other clients benefitting from them. ?This type of lead should be marketed digitally through email, direct mail, and online presence through LinkedIn, Facebook, and similar mediums, or it should be eliminated as a personal contact.
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·????? As a salesperson, we understand that time is a limited resource. ?Once it’s gone, it’s gone forever. ?Therefore, the time spent following up personally should be cherished. ?Respectful and productive communication is critical to maximizing this precious resource and building successful sales relationships.
?·????? The salesperson may follow up with leads who are disrespectful or condescending. ?When this occurs, the salesperson should give them another chance in case they just had a bad day. ?Maintaining professionalism and sending them an email that says something like this is crucial. ?“Thank you for taking my call this morning.? You appeared to have little interest in hearing from me in our conversation. ?Would it be appropriate for me not to contact you personally in the future?” Based on the response, you can continue to call them periodically directly. ?You may keep them in your marketing database for email, LinkedIn, Facebook, and other mediums that do not require personal contact.?? Of course, the last option is the big “D”?
Handling Rejection: The first element of handling rejection and occasional disrespect is realizing that a few prospects will mistreat us, but it is not about any of us.? It is about them.? The second is learning how the salesperson should handle both rejection and occasional disrespect. ?A prospective buyer or lead may not be intended to be personally disrespectful but merely a rejection of the request.?The rejection was not meant to be individual. ?
Exhausting and wearing us down: Many failed sales requests or disrespectful rejections daily can be exhausting, for some salespersons cannot learn this. ?It is part of the sales business, the primary reason that a sales job is one of the most challenging jobs in our society. ?All the rejections can easily affect one’s self-worth.
Over time, if the salesperson cannot learn not to take the rejection and occasional disrespectful comments personally, that person may be better suited to functioning in a support role rather than out on the front lines of the sales effort.
Listening and taking a sincere interest in our clients and their needs: If the salesperson listens to the subliminal reasoning for a disrespectful rejection, one might find that the person being solicited has multiple personal problems outside the conversation. ?The person may be projecting their issues onto the solicitor.? As difficult as it may seem, the master salesperson will treat the solicited party with kindness and respect even while receiving a disrespectful comment.? Any decision about altering the marketing approach and follow-up of the person can be made later.
Thank you
Dan Harkey
Educator and Private Money Finance Consultant
949 533 8315?? [email protected]
Visit www.danharkey.com
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