I Don't Feel Like It

Today is Sunday, also known around the house as DCD. The acronym stands for "Dreadful Chore Day," and while no one remembers who came up with it, the reality is that it stuck in everyone's heads like super glue. It takes at least eight hours of specific activities to keep the family's surroundings clean, neat, and well-maintained. Everyone has their own list of assigned tasks, and while they vary, the end goal is to keep the household running smoothly and efficiently.

Milo is the family's youngest member. He's only eight years old, so he's responsible for keeping his room tidy. And this is where the problem begins. On the floor is his usual assortment of pants, T-shirts, hoodies, socks, and sneakers from the week. There isn't a single empty space on his desk, which now resembles the foundation of a comic book tower rather than a homework table. Milo is still curled up in one corner of his bed, surrounded by action figures, model cars, toy robots, video games, and perpetually incomplete Lego sets. He blinks his eyes open and lightly taps the iPad while it charges on his nightstand. "Oh no, it's Sunday... DCD… I don’t feel like it. Anyway, I don't see why my room should be clean and organized. I should go back to sleep," he tells himself.

Lucy, his sister, is already awake. She sits on the living room sofa, like a proper 14-year-old, watching Stranger Things on Netflix. She realized it was DCD when she noticed there was little social media activity on her phone this morning. The day for her means bathing Fido, the grumpy old family dog, and grooming Whiskers, the wickedly smart housecat (who’s convinced that the family belongs to him rather than the other way around). "It’s sooo boooring...I don’t feel like it. I'll deal with them later. First, I'd like to eat some cereal, put on an avocado face mask, and paint my toes. I'll also text my BFFs to see if they want to go shopping later today," she thinks as she yawns loudly.

Nicholas, 43, is standing on the front porch. The self-proclaimed patriarch has converted the garage into a workshop, where he claims to fix all kinds of broken home appliances, from blenders and vacuums to washers and dryers. In reality, the presence of a lavish Osaki OS-4000 massage chair, a 65-inch Samsung OLED flat screen, and a retro pastel-blue SMEG mini fridge indicate that this is his man cave. “Rrrggghhh…the pile of broken stuff is only growing! I don't care if it's DCD, I don't feel like it," he muses as he succumbs to the bad habit of reorganizing for the hundredth time an already organized toolbox.

Finally, 41-year-old Valeria (mom, wife, and true family boss) sits at the kitchen table. She's beaming with pride after taking care of all the house bills, weekly grocery shopping, and organizing the kids' extracurricular activities. Her tasks don’t feel like chores because she understands their ultimate goal. Her motivation is always high because she gives herself enjoyable incentives and rewards along the way. And the small habits she incorporates into her weekend routine help to keep her discipline strong.

Procrastination is the act of delaying or postponing tasks despite the possibility of negative consequences. When we procrastinate, we end up doing trivial things instead of working on important, meaningful tasks. We procrastinate most on tasks that we find difficult, unpleasant, demanding, repulsive, or simply boring. It's a common tendency that most people succumb to at some point. However, for some, it can become a chronic problem with serious consequences in a variety of areas of life, including a person's social, professional, and financial well-being. It has also been linked to physical illness, like heart and digestive issues, insomnia, and migraines, as well as poor mental health, such as overwhelm, stress, and anxiety. In severe cases, procrastination can cause guilt, shame, low self-esteem, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and depression.

Why we procrastinate is a topic that’s still being researched. Experts appear to agree that the issue is one of emotion regulation rather than laziness or poor time management skills. It appears to be the result of a conflict between a person's limbic system and prefrontal cortex of the brain (i.e., the former seeks pleasure and/or avoids things that cause distress, while the latter wants to plan and make decisions). There are also behavioral procrastination triggers, according to Verywell Mind. Three common ones include not knowing what needs to be done or how to do it, not having the initiative to start something, and not carrying out tasks until other projects are completed. In short, many people appear to struggle with an unclear purpose (like Milo), low motivation (as with Lucy), and feeble discipline (similar to Nicholas).

In her book Get It Done, Ayelet Fishbach addresses these three issues by setting powerful goals. She emphasizes four features to accomplish this, beginning with establishing goals that are exciting rather than tedious. A goal not only points us in the right direction but also pulls us there. To accomplish this, it must feel more like an aspiration than a task. This is why somewhat abstract long-term goals work, as they capture the purpose of an action, describing what we're trying to achieve rather than the steps we'll take to get there. Furthermore, they allow us to fantasize, imagining what our lives will be like once we achieve our goals. We must be careful not to make them too abstract, as they can turn into fantasies if they become too vague. We must also state them in positive rather than negative terms. "Do" goals, also known as approach goals, identify a desirable state toward which we want to progress. "Do not" goals, also known as avoidance goals, steer us away from a state we want to avoid. A goal that’s framed as an avoidance goal is more likely to feel like a chore and thus will be less effective in keeping us motivated.

The second requirement for establishing a solid long-term goal is that it should be accompanied by specific and quantifiable short-term objectives. According to Forbes, specific goals have a clearly defined and articulated desired outcome. This entails defining what will be accomplished as well as the actions that must be taken. Furthermore, we need a measurable goal so that we can track our progress. To do so, we must first decide what data will be used and how it will be collected. It’s important to note that numerical targets are related not only to what we’ll do but also to when we’ll do it. This is because a goal without a deadline is useless to us.

According to Fishbach, the third component of goal setting is to include incentives that keep us interested along the way. The business world can teach us a lot about this. As reported by?McKinsey & Company, one of the world's leading management consulting firms, incentives can generate a lot of energy and excitement, but they must be directly linked to outcomes that we can control (otherwise they are ineffective). They should also encourage outperformance rather than just good performance so that we can pursue our full potential. Finally, we must ensure that rewards are received as soon as initiatives are completed. Making a clear connection between action and incentive reinforces our behavior change, which leads to the development of positive habits such as discipline.

Finally, goals must make use of the power of intrinsic motivation. The Self-Determination Theory of Motivation, developed by psychologists Richard Ryan and Edward Deci in 1985, was the first to introduce the term “intrinsic motivation” as a key component of human behavior. It’s defined as engaging in an activity for the sake of its inherent satisfaction rather than for some tangential benefit. When a person is intrinsically motivated, he or she is moved to act because of the pleasure or challenge involved, rather than because of external products, pressures, or rewards. Curiosity, challenge, control, recognition, cooperation, competition, and fantasy are all factors that promote intrinsic motivation, according to Healthline. Looking for the fun in activities, discovering ways to make tasks more engaging, finding meaning by focusing on the purpose of a task, focusing on mastering a skill, and helping someone in need are just a few examples of how we can harness the power of intrinsic motivation and thus strengthen our discipline along the way.

In 1835, shortly after the death of Presbyterian minister William Nevins, a selection of his manuscripts was published in a book titled Practical Thoughts. They were very popular at the time of their appearance and have continued to exert an influence for good to this time. In my view, the following quote is particularly relevant to the topic at hand: “Procrastination has been called a thief—the thief of time. I wish it were no worse than a thief. It is a murderer, and that which it kills is not time merely, but the immortal soul.”

Auhtor: Esteban Polidura, CFA. January 21, 2023.

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