I didn’t know then. I know now.

Last week’s International Mental Health Day prompted me to focus this edition of Lost in Translation on mental health and the lack of awareness, attention, and access for those from underrepresented groups. As with every edition of this newsletter, I want to bring awareness of the experiences of people from underrepresented groups and?to those that do not share many of our lived experiences.?My goal with this newsletter is to help illustrate and create an understanding of the additional burden or generational trauma that many must carry as they go about their workday, to navigate and move up in their careers, and to feel seen, heard, valued, and respected.?

Growing up, I never understood the concept of taking care of my mental health, nor did I see or hear of anyone in my family seeking ways to take care of or improve their mental health. If you were angry, sad, depressed, stressed, anxious, or just not feeling like the best version of yourself, you’d often hear “Eso se te pasa pronto. Tu veras.” (translation: “That’ll pass soon. You’ll see.”). It never really did go away, though. You just found creative ways to mask what you were really going through, so that people didn’t think you weren’t in the right state of mind or weak for not being able to overcome these different feelings you were experiencing. This masking can often lead to substance abuse, mental breakdowns, or worse.??

There is a stigma with mental health, especially amongst the Black and Latino communities. Only 1 in 3 Black Americans who could benefit from treatment receive it and lack of access to culturally competent care (source ) and an estimated 33% of Latinx adults with mental illness receive treatment each year compared to the U.S. average of 43% (source ). Why is this? We were taught to be strong, no matter what came your way, because there are so many things against us already that we could not and still cannot?afford to let our guard down and appear to be weak. Instead, we pretend that our negative thoughts and feelings do not exist, and we cover them up. For many of us it’s a survival mechanism.?

Here is the problem. If we?keep doing this, we will continue to pass this down from generation to generation, and we will never learn how to resolve conflict or work through our feelings in a healthy and productive way. A very good friend of mine, Lisa Fancyfied Francoeur ???? , once said on a panel “Trauma not transformed is trauma transferred.”?This leads to lack of trust, lack of self-awareness, poor communication and conflict resolution skills, lack of productivity, and negative results. But there is more. It also impacts your relationships with family members, romantic partners, friends, and colleagues and managers. It can even manifest when you are trying to resolve an issue with a customer service rep. Trust me. This is a thing. I have been there.

To be honest, you don’t realize how big of a problem it really is until you have no choice but to face your trauma head on and sometimes it is a little too late. You are now faced wanting to undo decades (or centuries) of trauma in just a few weeks.?Impossible!?

It happened to me. I remember working for a great company, but my direct leadership was the most toxic I ever had. Their expectation was for me to work 12+ hour days, take limited lunch breaks, and always be on, regardless of time. I was micromanaged every second of the day, which added to the challenges I was experiencing there. I would have the “Sunday scaries,” or anticipatory anxiety, which wouldn't?allow me to eat, sleep, nor function well. This, along with having a death in the family at the time, caused me to go into a deep depression and have elevated levels of anxiety. ?

I was sitting in my aunt’s living room with my family sitting around me. My cousin looked at me and?asked, “Illi, are you ok?” I couldn’t speak. I broke down sobbing, releasing the hurt, pain, and anxiety. I couldn’t pretend to be strong anymore. These feelings were not getting better. Not this time. I could not continue to keep the mask on, I needed help. Now! I remember feeling like such a failure and all I wanted to do was crawl into fetal position. This was too much to handle and I had no choice but to seek help.??

I sought out therapy, I did yoga, I meditated, I listened to binaural beats, I took long walks, I did everything I was told would help and it did…eventually. It took some time, but I started to feel like myself. I started gaining new tools that I could use to get me through any life situation that came my way.??

In the process, I had to unlearn what I was taught growing up and start focusing on new habits. I needed to learn what would serve me best in the most healthy and thoughtful way. There was a recent quote by Adam Grant, “Too many people wait until they’re exhausted or depressed to make change or seek help. Mental health isn’t something to put on the back burner. We can’t keep good habits in storage until we need them. Mental hygiene should be as ingrained in our daily routine as dental hygiene.” Today, I firmly subscribe to this.?

Though more people from underrepresented groups are starting to invest in their mental hygiene, there are still so many of us that either do not have access, do not have the resources to pay for the additional support, and still feel weak admitting that they need the help. Start small, if you need to, but commit to start. Your future self will thank you for it. ?

If you or someone you care about need support, here are a few resources you can tap into:???

• Let’s Talk About Mental Health ?
• How to Train Your Brain for Happiness ??
• Mental Resources for People of Color and Indigenous People
• CDC Mental Health Resources

Gentle reminder that you are no less successful because you need to ask for help. It is normal. It is human. It is needed.?

Feedback is a gift. Connect, comment, leave a question, or shoot me a note.?

[Thoughts and opinions in this newsletter are my own and not of my employer.] ?