I was deceived by the devil

This is a very important story I have to tell. It may not seem important at first but as you read this story, you'll discover that it is.

In the spring of 1984, I was really hungry for God, wanting to draw closer to Him. In order to do this, I felt it was necessary for me to get alone with the Lord. So, I asked my wife if she would mind if I rented a room for a week at a rundown motel right down the road from our house; probably about a mile away. She said that would be fine with her and besides, she could visit me anytime that she wanted. With my wife's blessing, I packed up a little suitcase of clothes, got in my car and drove down to the motel to rent a room. After making arrangements, I moved in. In the room I had, there a large TV which I did not want to watch, so I unplugged it and turned the screen towards the wall. Then I sat down with my bible, lexicons, concordances and notepads and began to study and pray. During the coming week, I had determined that I was going to do nothing but pray, seek God's face, fast and deny my flesh.

My motive in this would seem to be right but there was something a little distorted in this quest. You see, I really wanted to hear the voice of God, very precisely and explicitly. Now, you might ask what's wrong with that. At the time I did not realize it, but my motives were all wrong. I was motivated by pride. If the great Dr. Michael Yeager could be used by God using the gifts of knowledge and wisdom, then people would be absolutely stunned with amazement; astounded and dumbfounded as to how God was using me.

You see, I had heard of and read about men that were so precise with their words of knowledge and wisdom that people would sit in complete and utter wonder at their abilities to know their problems and situations. I really, really wanted what they had; all for the glory of God or so I told myself. But in all reality, my endeavor was all about me, me, and me. This is such an easy trap to fall into: to truly believe that our goals are for the glory of God when, in all reality, it is for self.

During my 40 years of ministry plus, I have seen person after person fall into this very trap which had been set for me by the enemy of my soul. Many really and truly believe that they are hearing the voice of God when, in fact, they are listening to familiar spirits. The doorway by which the enemy is coming in is through our hearts filled with pride. I cannot tell you how many times that I have heard people say, "God told me" when it was no more God then there are green, polka-dotted men and black and white striped women living on the moon. I have heard people say, God told me to leave my husband, God told me to leave my wife, God told me to leave my job, God told me that I am Elijah ………….. etc. etc. etc. This is how all false religions and doctrines begin, by having a spirit of pride wanting to be special or more important than anyone else. It all goes back to the very root of sin, which is me-ism, I, I, I inflated to the utmost degree.

Okay readers, back to the story which I was sharing. So here I was, locked up in this motel room, thinking that I was sincerely seeking the face of God, when actually I was fully motivated by pride. I was doing everything right. I was praying, fasting, reading my bible, memorizing scriptures and getting all pumped up. I absolutely knew the voice of God from almost a decade of walking with Him, but pride had crept in unaware and began to cloud my judgment. What I am sharing with you is extremely important because many well-known men of God have gone astray even, ending up believing that they were Elijah or some other famous prophet.

They heard a voice telling them something that was going to puff up their egos, their self-worth. A lot of the affirmation people are giving and preaching today is simply nothing more than the pumping up of the flesh, which ultimately leads to destruction and death. Our identity does not come from who we are or what we accomplish but who Jesus is in us. "In Christ" realities! It actually frightens me to ponder upon how much pride still dwells in my heart and in the hearts of other ministers, because we can only take people where we are living. If I am egotistical, prideful, self-loving, self-serving and self-centered then that is the only place where I can lead people.

So there I was, about the third day into this endeavor, when early in the afternoon I hear a voice in my mind telling me, "There is a pencil behind the desk.” In my mind I saw an image of a long, standard, yellow school pencil with an orange eraser at the top. Oh how my heart got ever so excited thinking that God was going to begin to show me even simple little things. Wow, would people ever be impressed once I came out of this motel room being able to tell them what was even in their pockets. Now, in order for me to get behind this desk, I was going to have to move this very large television from off of it. The first thing that I did was move the chair out of the way, then I grabbed hold of this large, monstrosity of a television set; huffing and puffing, I moved it over to the bed, setting it down onto the mattress. The desk was rather large so I walked to the side of it and grabbed it the best that I could, picking it up on one end and dragging it slowly away from the wall far enough to where I could get behind it. Then, I very excitedly got down on my hands and knees and began to look for this yellow pencil with an orange eraser.

But something was wrong. There was no pencil there. Surely it had to be there because I know the voice of God; I heard it. It was there. It had to be. I kept looking and looking for a very long time. High and low I kept on looking for this pencil that I knew God had showed me was there. I literally had become obsessed with finding this very special pencil because this was the foundation upon which I was going to begin to have a worldwide ministry. All of my success was built upon the fact that I must find that pencil.

All I can say is, thank God that I never did find that pencil! Now, why in the world would I say this? Because if I would have found that pencil, it would not have been the Spirit of God speaking to me but a familiar spirit speaking to and deceiving me. After this incident, I cried out to the Lord asking Him why I could not find that pencil that He showed to me. That's when the Lord began to speak to me very strongly, revealing to me my haughty and prideful heart. He opened up my understanding to see that many men and women have been completely hornswoggled, deceived, even hoodwinked by the devil through the spirit of pride.

You must always examine your heart in light of scriptures, contrasting it to the nature of Jesus Himself in order to make sure that you are not operating in the wrong spirit. I could share story after story of many women and men I have known whose hearts were filled with pride, arrogance and haughtiness. When this happens, they become extremely argumentative, self-centered and self-loving. They cannot and will not receive correction, even when it's from the Word of God because their hearts have become so hardened through the deceitfulness of the love of self. More times than I can or want to share, I have met people who were listening to the wrong spirits and voices. You could never convince them otherwise. Some of those people had simply become delusional in their own minds, constantly telling people what God has said, yet they displayed little evidence of godliness in their own lives. Such individuals as these will constantly justify the decisions which they have made even though they may be totally and completely contrary to the divine nature of Jesus, the life of Christ or the Word of God. Others have had even more dangerous encounters with such deceiving spirits to the point of hearing voices, having visions and dreaming dreams. Such experiences are of the devil. Appealing to one's vanity and aiming to deceive, he can appear as an angel of light with revelation knowledge that is completely contrary to the Word of God. Every word, deed, thought and action shall one day be judged by God's Word, which is flawless. That is why we must constantly judge our thoughts and our conduct according to God's standard so that we may be blameless and pure on That Day.

I am so glad that I had this ridiculous experience with the pencil because God constantly brings it back to my mind to double check my motives and to make sure that the voice I am listening to is of the Lord. And still, even though I had this experience, I hate to admit that much of my Christianity has been me listening to the wrong voices. How in the world can I say this? Because I look at what I have poured my life into, the results that it has produced and the fruit that has come from it. I am convinced that most people who say that they know Christ are listening to the wrong voices because the fruit that is being produced is not bringing glory to God.

If you really want to hear the still small voice of God, then you need to take the time that is necessary to meditate upon the Scriptures. As you meditate upon the written word, the Holy Spirit will be able to speak to you much clearer.