I Choose Joy

In the early stages of my leadership career, I consistently awoke with a sense of joy—a feeling of serving others, championing a team, and making a meaningful impact. While I might have simply described it as waking up happy back then, reflecting on those moments now, I realize that feeling was genuine joy.

For me, joy is a subtle internal exhilaration, a blend of excitement and contentment. Recently I had the luxury of sitting on the patio of a charming neighborhood restaurant, watching some children playing on the lawn. While I was observing their curiosity and discovery, it seemed they were experiencing joy. The sun was fading and the innocence of their play was profoundly satisfying.?

In Brené Brown's book, "Atlas of the Heart," joy is defined as "the good mood of the soul." She further characterizes it as an intense feeling of deep spiritual connection, pleasure, and appreciation. Brown emphasizes that although joy is indescribable, experiencing it allows us to become more authentically ourselves.

Somewhere along my leadership journey, joy was replaced by anxiety— not every day, but frequently. I can't pinpoint when it began, but I transitioned from "They pay me to do this?" to "They can't pay me enough to do this." I was constantly striving to prove myself, demonstrate my worth, and showcase my value, ultimately losing sight of who I really was.

Recently, I conducted a thorough examination of my leadership style, motivations, and path. I delved into what truly motivates me and what doesn't, creating a list of my truths.

Truth:? I am not a morning exercise person.?

Truth:? Coffee is just okay. (Don’t hate me)

Truth:? Grocery shopping brings me happiness.?

Truth:? I am a servant leader.

I found that championing someone else's success is what excites me the most. Although this truth is integral to my leadership style, it is not always universally celebrated; sometimes, it is viewed as a weakness.

Serving and championing others may seem to undermine one's own knowledge and skills. The question arises: if you are perceived as a thought partner, can you truly be seen as a leader? The pressure to have all the answers in the corporate boardroom is enough to induce anxiety, yet nobody possesses all the answers— it truly takes a village.

I was once on a two-week business retreat and I found myself on a team of "alpha leaders." It became evident that we couldn't all take charge. Recognizing that leadership, in that moment, was more about championing the group, following to lead, and making space for others to shine, allowed real progress to unfold.

Truth - Connecting and serving others is ingrained in my DNA; I can't resist it even if I tried. And, it brings me joy. When I connect the dots for someone, assist with a problem, or promote another person's brilliant idea, I become my true self.

These days, I embrace my truth without guilt. No more apologies for not exercising first thing or for my leaders-eat-last mentality (thank you, Simon Sinek). Recognizing my truth has enabled me to lean into my gifts and talents, and now, I wake up most days with a calm that can only be described as joy.

Oh, and truth:? I am still visited by my foe, anxiety, but when she visits, I check to see if I am living my truth or if I am instead, striving to manifest a picturesque morning jog in my best Lululemon outfit on the way to a hot latte!

Want to know more? Connect with me and let's chat!?

Ellen is an executive thought leader, business strategist and coach who is optimistic, energetic, and committed to serving and connecting others. She believes human resources is the business of people and the core of the company. The most successful organizations are those that align their talent strategies with their business strategies to ensure an organization’s people and culture are championed. HR’s primary function is to advocate for the total wellbeing of the company, the employee and the consumer - not always in that order!

As a passion project, she runs a theatre company that performs live theatre in site-specific spaces with a mission to reimagine live theatre with innovative experiences that bring our community together.?