I challenged myself to go to a new place every week. Here's what I learned.

The term “third place” was coined by sociologist Ray Oldenburg in 1989. Third places, or third spaces, are informal community gathering spaces apart from home (first place) and work (second place), where people can share ideas, activities and time with others. As a chronically online recent graduate and remote worker, I’m trying to feel more embedded in my local community. So, I’ve embarked on a six-week “Third Spaces Challenge” — finding, visiting and evaluating a new third space in my hometown each week. Just over halfway into this project, I’ve already noticed big changes in my social satisfaction and comfort.

So far, I’ve been to a rock-climbing gym, a pottery studio and a group barre fitness class (twice). Unsurprisingly, forcing myself to go to a new place every week has dramatically improved my small talk, body language and conversational skills — particularly when it comes to asking good questions.

This is an excerpt of Renee Yaseen’s Post Grad column. Read the rest for free on washingtonpost.com,

You can also follow Renee on Instagram at @washpostgrad.

What I’ve learned from four weeks of making friends IRL

Do you have advice for meeting friends through talking to strangers?

Below are two reader responses to our question of the week that stood out. To get our complete collection of reader responses each week, sign up to get the full edition of Post Grad.

“Try to help them! When I’m on the bus, at an event or traveling, I have made the most friends by simply picking up something someone dropped or letting someone know there was a seed in their tooth. I was in Hyde Park in London this August, and a strange man seemed to bother a woman sitting a few feet from me. I intervened to get him to leave her alone, and the woman and I struck up a conversation. We ended up spending the whole day exploring London together and meeting up the following day. We now text and chat and are still getting to know each other.” — Gabbie C., 27

“People like talking about themselves, so I ask them questions about themselves. Also, I have read that a lot of making friends is situational and repeated interaction. Keep doing something over and over again and people will get more familiar, and you’ll have more interactions and shared experiences that lead to friendship. I have a lot of friends, and I’ll talk to anyone, but that doesn’t mean that I know people in every situation I am in. I have to remind myself that it is okay to be quiet at times and to not know people. I think some people think other people don’t need friends. It has been my experience that almost everyone is happy to make a friend. So, I view my interactions in that lens. Finally, when I was a new mom, I had no mom friends and once my cousin told me to just ask people for their number and try to make plans. She said it won’t work out with everyone, but it will work enough to be worth putting myself out there. She was right!” — Becky R., 42

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