I am Now a Senior Citizen

Today marks a milestone in my life...I am officially a senior citizen! In addition to making me eligible for many discounts, I can also purchase my senior lifetime pass for our National Parks. And, if I so choose, I could begin collecting social security. There are of course many good things about this milestone, besides the fact that perhaps it beats the alternative ??

Aging in our culture is an interesting process. As women we are so often encouraged to defy the aging process with so many "beauty" products, everything from collagen (which is available in so many forms!) to Botox and hair coloring. Yes, I've bought into some of it and have taken collagen pills, used various anti-aging creams on my wrinkles, and even colored may hair more than once. Yet, I've realized over the past few years that none of it really matters.

I stopped coloring my hair (outside of a few fund colors on the tips) in 2019 and am coming to terms with the gray that is coming in. While I still use decent cleansing and moisturizing products most days (when I'm not feeling lazy), I've given up on the many products that are designed to hide wrinkles and age spots. I've earned them all fair and square, so I'm learning to accept each one. I'm also learning to rethink and notice beauty.

A few years ago while working with a spiritual director, I identified beauty as a core value in my life. Some may find that a little odd, or perhaps vain. But for me, this discovery was not about beauty in the traditional sense. It's about noticing the beauty in everyday things. The hint of color in the sky as the sun sets. The amazing smile on a friend's face - wrinkles, age spots, and all - when we see each other after a few weeks of absence. A flower, especially those that pop up in unexpected places. The beauty of an aging woman who walks with confidence and owns her gray hair, wrinkles, and aching knees. That's sort of what prompted this post.

Last week I was walking into a local grocery store and noticed a woman get out of her car as I passed. She had the most beautiful head of thick, gorgeous gray hair. I scooted up next to her and complicated her on it, which led to a brief, yet meaning, conversation about the challenges of going gray in our society, particularly for women. That tiny conversation brought me great joy, because there was so much beauty in it! Here's the thing...growing old is a privilege and recognizing the beauty of it is a blessing!

My dad will be 87 in March. He has a great head of long gray hair, plenty of wrinkles, and has aches and pains pretty much every single day. My dad also has a great sense of humor, a posture of learning, and a deep faith that I believe has helped him come to terms with his own death. He per-planned his funeral over 20 years ago in Arizona, and as we’ve reviewed the details and I’ve updated things for him here in Michigan, it prompted me to get my own in order. Why you might wonder, because there’s beauty in the gift that my dad is giving myself and my siblings…he’s taken the worry and anxiety out it. I can enjoy the time with him knowing that he’s made decisions that are important to him, the power of choice is a beautiful thing!

So today, as I embrace officially being a senior citizen, I don’t have any plans to retire or collect social security. I’m enjoying the beauty that comes with being comfortable in my skin, having enough financial security that allows me the power to make choices that fit for me (and yes, I acknowledge that is indeed a privilege!), enjoying work that I love doing, and taking vacations filled with beauty and learning. So, I offer this advice, given from a sage “old” woman of 62…

• Embrace every gray hair, wrinkle, and ache as a sign that you’re still here and you have been given today as an opportunity to make a difference.
• Take the time to notice the beauty that is all around you, even on gray Michigan days.
• Pursue your dreams every single day…especially when they feel impossible. I for one still have so many things yet to accomplish and I’m making little strides every day!
• Understand what is important to you and create even greater space for it in your life. For me, I’ve identified relationships as of key importance. It is the driving force behind every symphony date, dinner party, tea party, phone call, etc. in my life. ?
• Travel more, especially internationally. Engaging in other cultures and opening yourself to new experiences can be so beautiful, not to mention that it teaches us so much!
• Always have a heart open to learning and growing, no matter how old you get. That means being uncomfortable at times or maybe feeling silly and embarrassed as we learn something new…and yes, I’m still working on that one!
• Laugh every day! Find silly videos, watch a funny movie, be sure to have at least one friend in your life that reminds you to laugh at yourself (thank you Laur Schaberg ).
• Finally, for my fellow senior citizens, take advantage of every discount available to you! Here's a list to get you started, and don't forget to buy your lifetime National Parks pass.