Humbled Schmumbled

Okay, I’ll admit this thing that annoys me isn’t the worst habit people allow themselves on LinkedIn. But I’ll also admit I find this thing not just annoying, but particularly annoying. Because it’s usually some combination of language abuse and outright lying. Both of which I’m against.

I’m talking about “humbled.”

If you’ve spent much time here, you’ve seen this blight on the LinkedIn ecosystem. “Humbled” gets trotted out whenever someone wants to brag on themselves but doesn’t want to get caught bragging on themselves. As if the very purpose of LinkedIn isn’t giving people a platform for bragging on themselves.

F’rinstance these real-world examples (revealing details kindly redacted):

• “I am humbled to have spoken at the prestigious (CONFERENCE).”
• “Humbled and excited to share that I have joined (COMPANY).”
• “Humbled to have been interviewed by (BUSINESS WRITER).”

Are these circumstances where humbled feels like an honest description of what would, should or could be going on in the hearts and minds of these folks? Humbled by a speaking engagement? A new job? A media interview? How low does one’s self esteem have to be that these not uncommonplace career activities would be considered humbling?

Or is it possible humbled is dropped merely to soften the bragging? That these folks do not in fact feel humbled but do believe saying so makes them sound less full of themselves? When – ironically – it actually makes them sound more full of themselves.

THE OTHER H WORD

Humbled is perhaps most commonly paired with another H word: “Honored.” Think of it as humbled for beginners.

• “So honored and humbled to receive the 2021 (AWARD) from my undergraduate alma mater.”
• “I’m extremely honored, humbled and excited to have accepted the role of (JOB) for the (RESTAURANT COMPANY).”
• “I am honored and humbled to be among the women featured in (BOOK ABOUT WOMEN IN BUSINESS).”
• “Honored. Humbled. This is an amazing group of individuals to be recognized alongside.”

This is verbal autopilot. It’s like a macro in the brain. The brain says, “I need to sound gracious,” and the fingers type out some version of “Humbled and honored.” Is humbled needed? Heck, no. Honored is more than sufficient to get the point across.

Though I do have to award points for this, my favorite of the “honored and humbled” genre:

• “Humbled to be honored!”

There’s an almost Zenlike economy in those four words. Interestingly, you can say “Humbled to be honored,” but I don’t think anybody would be inclined to say, “Honored to be humbled.”

Hmm.

Humbled-Not-Humbled

People don’t seem inclined to think through what they’re writing when the word humbled is in play. Do they ask themselves, “Is it the right word?” No. “Is there a better word?” No. “Can the other words wrapped around it get by without using the H word?” Also no.

Consider these:

• “I am grateful, humbled, and ecstatic to share that I am officially an owner and President of (COMPANY).”
• “Joyful, shocked & humbled to receive (SOME AWARD NOBODY’S HEARD OF).”
• “Humbled and excited to join the team at (RIGHTWING POLITICAL GROUP).”
• “I am absolutely thrilled and humbled to share that I’ve joined (INTERNATIONAL SHOE COMPANY WITH QUESTIONABLE LABOR PRACTICES IN A CERTAIN LARGE TOTALITARIAN COUNTRY).”

Take humbled out of each of those sentences. Is anything meaningful lost? Not at all. One might even argue the statements would be simultaneously more true and less trite.

I call those examples Humbled-Not-Humbled. Because by all appearances the writers are experiencing zero degrees of humbledness. They feel the opposite of being humbled. They’re excited. Thrilled. Ecstatic. Joyful.

My favorite of these inapt pairings is humbled and “proud”:

• “My book won 3 more awards. Very humbled and proud.”
• “Every day I am humbled and proud to represent some of the most storied brands in sports and entertainment.”
• “I cannot begin to explain how proud, humbled, and starstruck I am to announce (BUSINESS DEAL).”

Why do I love these so? Because BY DEFINITION humbled and proud are opposites. You simply can’t be both at the same time. Choose one, please.

EVERYBODY’S HUMBLED

Coincidentally, a once-upon-a-time colleague of mine, Jeff Eaker, happened to write on this topic just last week at his blog, The Kingdom Of Failure.

In that piece, Jeff focuses exclusively on ad people. But it’s not just ad people, I hate to say. I’ve seen this pernicious language in posts from lawyers, salespeople, writers of the non-advertising variety, news media professionals, auto industry executives and, I kid you not, a former supermodel.

That said, Jeff’s instincts are correct. Ad people embrace humbled with particular gusto and a complete lack of concern for whether it’s true or not (helpful hint: if they’re ad people, it’s probably not true). What ad people are exceptionally gifted at when misusing humbled is smooshing as much bragging into their post as humanly possible:

• “So excited, so humbled and pumped for the expansion of this amazing (ADDITIONAL BUSINESS WIN FROM AN EXISTING CLIENT).”
• “So thrilled to have been awarded a Silver Star in (SOME KIND OF ONLINE COMPETITION THAT REQUIRES YOU TO BUY A BOOK, SO I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT’S ABOUT, BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT TO BUY THE BOOK). Such an honour indeed and really humbled to have work recognized by amazing global experts.”
• “More than five creatives have reached out to me in the last few months wanting to get advice about how to do what I’ve done in advertising. Which is super humbling.”

More than five? Does that mean six? Or a million? Either way, it doesn’t sound "super humbling." Especially considering that bit about people wanting his or her “advice about how to do what I’ve done.”

Which I think kind of pushes to the point of all this: It’s okay NOT to be humbled.

HUMBLED? WHY?

Over my several years of reading posts like these, what I inevitably come back to is one fundamental question: Is humbled the right emotion to wrap around the news that’s being shared far and wide across LinkedInLand?

By my enumeration, occasionally it is; usually it is not.

• “I’m humbled to have been awarded 9 Emmys, so far.”

This was from a local (not Detroit) news personality who correctly opened his or her post with an honest admission that LinkedIn “is a place for accomplishments.” Does he or she really need to hedge the post about all those Emmys – which includes a photo of a whole bunch of Emmys – when what he or she wants to do is take a bit of a victory lap and show off his or her Emmys?

• “Had a great time with the team who put on (ONE OF THE TED EVENTS; DON’T GET ME STARTED ON TED)! Humbled to be a part of a great group of speakers with ideas worth sharing!”

My quibbles with TEDx, y or z aside, the artifice of humbled and the way it detracts from a perfectly legitimate celebratory feeling seems out of place.

There’s nothing wrong with being excited. You’re allowed to be excited. You’re allowed to be proud.

It’s not the bad kind of pride (like Mr. Darcy at the start of Pride And Prejudice, looking down his nose at the bumpkins who live in the vicinity of Netherfield Park). It’s a reasonably good kind of pride, a desire to take delight in achievement and share legitimate accomplishment with people you know. Or know of. Or somehow have ended up Linked with despite having no idea who they are.

It’s okay, on LinkedIn, to show off a little bit.

IN OTHER WORDS?

Besides, there are plenty of other perfectly wonderful words to use when showing off, sharing news, celebrating a win or whatever.

Consider these conspicuously humbled-free posts:

• “We are super proud to be recognised as the #1 in (VERTICAL PUBLIC RELATIONS FIELD) in (COUNTRY).”
• “Overwhelmingly proud to announce (AD AGENCY) won a jaw-dropping 9 awards at (AD COMPETITION) this year, including 2 Gold, 6 Silver, and Best of Show!”
• “Thrilled to share that (TECH FIRM) has chosen (CITY) for our first office here in (COUNTRY).”
• “Delighted to share that I have been elected Chairman of the (INDUSTRY ORGANIZATION).”
• “Wow!! Speechless and extremely grateful for this honor!”
• “Super PUMPED to announce that I am now the (JOB TITLE) at (AD AGENCY) dedicated to the (CLIENT) business (specifically leading [BRAND] and [BRAND])!!”

I think I like that last one best. “Super PUMPED” lets you know this person is legitimately and truly excited about his or her career advancement. Which is, again, the point of posting such news on LinkedIn.

You’ve got to respect that.

As I’ve said, it’s okay to be excited. It’s okay to be proud. It’s okay to be thrilled, thankful, grateful, pleased, happy and/or delighted.

If you can’t be those things here on LinkedIn, where can you be?

* * *

Okay, I’ve finally gotten that off my chest. As I said earlier, it’s not the worst thing people do on LinkedIn. It’s just annoying. (The worst thing people do on LinkedIn is the messages they send you after you’ve accepted their LinkedIn request, trying to sell you something, despite your having never met them before in your life. But that’s a gripe for another day.)

One last note, however:

I’ve been collecting these uses of humbled for some time now. LinkedIn serving content the way it does, these posts have come from people I’m Linked with or – mostly – people they’re Linked with.

If, by some small chance, you recognize your own words in any of the LinkedIn posts referenced above, please understand there’s no ill will on my part. Perfectly fine people give in to this temptation. I find the humbled phenomenon annoying but also fascinating, in its way.

So please make allowances for my presumption in using your words.

If you do, I will consider myself truly humbled.