How Are You Showing Up?

How your team, customers and suppliers perceive you, matters

 “I‘m dreading what today is going to bring – yesterday was so awful”, complained Amy, the Executive Assistant and Sales Administrator for the CEO of a mid-sized manufacturing company. “You just never know what you’re going to get with him. Some days he walks in really upbeat and energetic, and other days he’s like a huge dark cloud that we all try to avoid. It’s really exhausting.”

Because I was working with this particular CEO, I understood the source of Amy's angst. Other members of his leadership team had, confidentially, shared the same frustrations. There were palpable mood swings, unpredictable and inconsistent behaviors and frequent rough language, sometimes directed at staff members. Curiously, at other times, he remained incredibly calm and controlled. It was this unpredictability that was so exasperating for the team. It seemed to be a roll of the dice.

This is a grievance frequently echoed across the business world. Toxic leaders are, unsurprisingly, the top cause of misery in the workplace. A recent study, conducted by Gallup, concluded that 80% of employees who left their jobs in 2018, did so to get away from a bad manager or leader. My own experience has unequivocally proven to me that when a leader is unpredictable, volatile and/or moody, the best people in the organization will make their plan to exit at the first opportunity. Why? Because people who work for those who display these traits not only feel more depressed due to their bosses' behavior but are also more likely to engage in undesirable behaviors at work. Simply put: People don’t leave jobs, they leave managers.

In 2015, The University of Manchester’s Business School conducted research on this subject. Findings of this research was presented at the Division of Occupational Psychology's annual conference in Liverpool by lead researcher Abigail Phillips.

A total of 1,200 participants from a wide range of industries and countries took part in three studies, completing questionnaires relating to their own psychological well-being, the prevalence of work negativity in their organization and their manager's personality.

Analysis of the data showed that those working for leaders who display these damaging traits had lower levels of job satisfaction and scored higher on a clinical measure of depression. Beyond this, instances of counterproductive work behavior and workplace bullying were also higher under their leadership. The findings also showed that a boss’ poor behavior trickles down to their employees and affects the workplace at large, triggering a vicious cycle of negativity in a company.

While these are certainly factors contributing to the increased depression and low job satisfaction that employees of poor leaders experience, it’s clear that working for a toxic boss can lead to other types of health problems. Employees of bad managers are at greater risk for high blood pressure, chronic stress, sleep problems, anxiety, substance abuse issues, overeating, heart attacks and other health problems.

“The evidence is clear that the leadership qualities of ‘bad’ bosses over time exert a heavy toll on employees’ health,” Harvard Medical School researcher Jonathan Quick previously told The Washington Post.

In a 2009 Forbes article, Sara Eckel writes, “The ability to manage your emotions is an essential leadership skill and responsibility. The best managers make the connection between negativity in the workplace and a negative balance sheet. To make the obvious and opposite point, according to Professor Barsade's 2007 study co-authored by Donald Gibson, who is an associate professor of management at the Dolan School of Business at Fairfield University: "Expressing positive emotions and moods tends to enhance performance at individual, group and organizational levels."

In Amy’s case, she had no idea what to expect in her leader, from day-to-day, and the emotional toll she paid for that uncertainty and anxiety was devastating to her. Is that the effect he wanted to impose on his staff? Probably not, but failure to be self-aware as a leader is still a leadership failure. One of the most important questions I ask of every new client is, “How would your leadership team characterize you as a leader and boss?” Sometimes the answers are surprising and, intentionally, invoke some self-examination. When there is uncertainty, a large part of my role as a business advisor and mentor is to provide a process that reveals and addresses those weaknesses and the tools to strengthen them.

 One of the most influential and inspiring leaders I’ve ever had the privilege to work with, Jimmy DeMesa, was remarkably consistent in how he “showed up” for his company. During a dark time when our company was under serious legal assault and he was besieged with uncertainty and threat, he never wavered from his inspirational energy and positive narrative. Although those of us inside his leadership circle were acutely aware of the critical situation, we often remarked at how he was able to project an unvarying style and optimism when others would have withered and eroded under the pressure. He always “showed up” for us and the company, and we all showed up for him because we believed in him and the mission.

There is no doubt that the pressures and demands of being a business leader, CEO or owner can sometimes empty your emotional and intellectual fuel tank. That is part of the burden we acknowledge as business leaders. Your staff, employees, customers and suppliers are, as a rule, taking many of their cues from you and are directly affected by how you show up every day. Consistency and a high level of predictability in the behaviors and energy you bring to the office every day, regardless of how you may be churning or agitating within, are central to your team trusting and believing in their leader and ensuring that the team shows up for you.

So, the question stands: How are you showing up?

~Michael Weis

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