How You Say Your Words Is Just As Important As What You Say
Amy Blaschka
Professional Image Consultant | Color & Style Expert | I help leaders elevate their presence to magnify their impact. | Former Ghostwriter | Forbes Leadership Contributor
Welcome back! Don't forget to scroll down to get links to all of my content from this week! ??
________________________________
Everywhere you look, audio is on the rise.
A recent?NPR study?found that spoken-word audio listening has risen 40% in the past seven years. And no wonder. We listen to podcasts and audiobooks, communicate using voice memos and conduct Zoom call with our cameras turned off.
On social media, users are invited to hang out in live chat rooms and listen to podcasts or record a short clip to their profiles.
Even a recent?Wall Street Journal?article?chronicled the popularity of the voice recording feature on online dating apps.
Our voice says a lot about us to others, for better or worse. And with an increase in audio-based communication,?how?you say something is just as important as?what?you’re saying.
According to?Vanessa Van Edwards, author of the book?Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication, the best way to ensure your intended message comes through is to master your vocal cues.
“When we listen to someone speak,” writes Van Edwards, “we’re listening for two things: confidence and emotion.”
Confidence conveys power—a low tone and the right inflection signals that others should take you seriously.
Emotion expresses warmth. Vocal variety and a lively vocal tone make you interesting to others, capturing their attention.
Ideally, you want both. But how can you be sure to get the balance right and be your most charismatic? Here’s how Van Edwards breaks down vocal cues:
COMPETENCE CUES
Want to increase vocal presence? Consider these cues:
Low tone?- When we’re nervous, our voice tends to pitch higher, but a confident tone is the lowest pitch you can comfortably speak in.
Volume control?- The best communicators speak louder and understand how to vary their volume to highlight what’s important, whether that’s something they’re excited about (louder) or sharing a secret tip (lower).
Pausing?- Instead of using a filler word like “uh” or “um,” pause briefly and take a breath. The most powerful pause is done right before delivering a punch line or revealing an important idea, building intrigue and excitement with your listening audience.
WARMTH CUES
If you need to dial up your vocal warmth, try these cues:
Happy hello?- When you’re happy (or sad), your voice reflects that, so be mindful of your mood when speaking to someone. Van Edwards advises never to answer the phone when you’re angry.
Warm-ups?- Using phrases like “So happy you called!” and “Here’s a digital high five!” signal reassurance and belonging to others, spreading warmth.
Vocal variety?- A monotone voice kills your warmth. Instead, find ways to use vocal variety to emphasize your points.
领英推荐
Vocal invitations?- Using words like “Ooo” and “Mmm-hmm” signal agreement and using encouraging words like “Fascinating” and “Wow” to nudge others to keep talking. And subtly mirror others vocally by repeating “Got it!” or “Okay!” when someone is seeking confirmation.
Channeling?- Channeling your speaking role model can help you improve your vocal charisma by adopting their vocal cues.
DANGER ZONE CUES
To present your best vocal self, be careful to avoid these negative vocal cues:
Question inflection?- If you end your sentences on an up tone (called “up talk”), you’ll sound unsure, and people will question your competence. Instead,?tell?people what you want them to know, don’t?ask?them.
Vocal fry?- When your voice creaks and sounds raspy, you’re using vocal fry and undermining your message. Eliminate it by taking a breath and speaking a bit louder.
By being intentional with your vocal cues, you’ll naturally convey warmth and confidence.
________________________________
BONUS! HERE IS THIS WEEK'S CONTENT:
________________________________
Bachelor of Commerce - BCom from Nizam College at Hyderabad Public School
2 年????
Multidimensional Healer, Author, and Thought Leader in Epstein-Barr Virus (EBV), Entity Intereference and Personal Transformation
2 年Amazing work as always Amy Blaschka We absolutely need to be intentional of the cues we're sending so we can send the right ones ????
Entrepreneur, Investor, Mentor & Coach - "Helping others Succeed" - founder of The Evolved CEO, The Evolved Healer & Perform Media
2 年Great insights from your article Amy Blaschka?... It is often more in how we say it than what we say ??
Keynote Speaker, Author & Developmental Coach | Join me for Numinous - 14th March ????? Book a call with me to become stress-free and unshakeable in business and life.
2 年SO GOOD! SO HELPFUL! Thank you Amy. ???????
Business Consultant ? Co-Founder & CEO ? Youth & Leadership Mentor ? Executive Coach ? I equip business leaders and individuals with strategic insights for profitable outcomes & transformative management solutions
2 年Great tips Amy Blaschka and it’s like the saying goes, ‘it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it’ that counts. Love your work and have an amazing weekend??