How are you doing?

Let's talk about performance improvement for a moment.

I'm sure we've all been told from time to time at work that we need to improve our performance. Being nice people who are keen to learn and happy to take feedback on board we listen and try to improve, that's life right? 

Now that's usually a very positive thing, I find it really hard to reflect and figure out exactly how I need to improve. Getting other prospectives are invaluable to figure what to do better. 

In fact I could write a whole post about the value of feedback, self awareness and listening to constructive criticism. 

But what do you do if the feedback you've got is unfair or even unfounded?

Or worse, if it actually discrimination?

I know in my case, I had to do some real digging before I found out that not only was the reason for a performance improvement largely based on discrimination (in my case dyslexia), no one had bothered to check if the opinion had any validity. As opposed to being an abuse of power. The worst part being when I presented my case, it wasn't acknowledged. I was then unconditionally told it didn't matter if the reasons were founded on any evidence as the process had already started. 

Does that sound wrong to you, because it certainly did to me. 

The lawyer I spoke to found this all fascinating and is probably rather surprised I didn't take the legal action I should of. Mainly because I didn't want to fight. I don't have the energy or inclination. 

What I did get upset by was the unfairness of it all and worse the fact it made my doubt myself. Thankfully I had the sense to go and check with those I worked with. Had they been covering for me? Did they all believe I was failing them? Had I been blind to so much. The answer was surprise and reassurance. No one could even guess as to the reasons why and seems as shocked as I was. This support network was the only thing that gave me any solace and restored my confidence. And to those people I'm continually grateful. 

However, not everyone has the nerve to open up about something like this. And they never know if they are being unjustly judged. 

More important is the resilience to get up. After you've been knocked down, it's easier to stay down, your less likely to be hurt again. And sometimes others opinions can seem so important we lose our own voice.

This is where I get angry. Because basically unfair judgement can have a massive detrimental effect. Not just on working lives but personal as well. While I found my strength through the support of others, not everyone is so lucky. And I've known enough people to lose their confidence because of similar situations and bullying at work to be enraged that this still happens. It happens all the time. 

At the end of the day we need to have open, honest and fair in conversations. 

I know when I've been on the other side, conducting reviews when people are under performing or even worse having to let someone go it's unbelievably difficult. Sometimes the role is just wrong for the person and vice versa. No normal person enjoys it. But at times it has to be done and you've got to have the difficult conversation. The trick is doing it with as much clarity and respect as possible. At the end of the day you have a duty of care to those in you team, the organisation and the individual. 

While no one is going to be happy, mutual respect goes a long way. 

So here is a useful list of things to check:

1. If you going to give constructive feedback, have the good sense to have evidence for that 

2. Ask, is this personal or professional? Because if its personal, why are you bringing it up? 

3. Ask yourself if the feedback your going to give is more helpful or hurtful. If your out to hurt someone, keep it to yourself 

4. Sleep on it, because time and cooler heads really do prevail and allow your rational brain to kick in

5. Empathise with the person you are talking to, this is a two way conversation 

6. Give the recipient time to reflect. Difficult news is just that. Not everyone is ready to react right away

7. Be willing to answer questions 

8. Most importantly if your delivering someone else's message, check and check again, that's the very least you can do