How to Write a Thank You Letter

As the holiday season approaches, our minds turn to appreciating those around us. We might give a thoughtful gift in December, but we can start the holiday season by focusing on the "thanks"?in Thanksgiving. Whether you plan to give a holiday gift or not, consider writing a thank-you letter this holiday season.

A thank-you letter is different from a thank-you note, which is a social nicety that follows a specific event, such as a gift or dinner invitation. "Thank you for the beautiful vase,"?or "Thank you for including me in your dinner party,"?are the usual fare in thank-you notes.?

In comparison, a thank-you letter acknowledges a relationship and the impact that relationship has had on your life. It requires you to dig deeply into yourself and your connection to the other person and recognize how they contribute to you. Doing this demands humility as you admit that whatever success you have achieved, you have not accomplished it alone.?

When delivered sincerely, a thank-you letter can give your reader the precious gift of being seen. Many people wander through their lives feeling unappreciated and invisible. By writing a brief message that shows you have heeded their toil, you brighten their spirits. Your letter need not be lengthy as long as it is sincere.?

Elements to include in thank-you letters.

• Be specific . Don't hide out in generalities. Say exactly what the person did to enhance your life. Did they stay late to finish an important assignment? Did they clean up after your team left the conference room a mess? If all you say is, "You've been very helpful,"?you are not saying much. To demonstrate that you truly appreciate the other person, think of a specific example to illustrate how helpful they have been.?
• Share the consequences of their actions. When our coworkers and support staff do their jobs, they might not be aware of how they contribute to the big picture. In your letter, tell them the positive repercussions of their actions. Let's say that they stayed late to finish a project. Did that project lead to some larger result such as a sale or new initiative? Show them why their actions mattered.?
• Use the words "thank you."?If you write, "I appreciate all your efforts,"?you are talking about yourself and how you feel. Instead, use the words "thank you."?In linguistics, thanking is considered a performative verb, meaning that simply by using the word "thank,"?you have performed the action of acknowledgment. Thanking someone is a real event.

Who should receive thank-you letters?

Start with the people who are least likely to receive acknowledgment during the year--the IT person who magically makes your computer work, the receptionist who starts your day with a smile--even office cleaners, doormen, and other support staff. For these folks, saying something like, "Thank you so much for showing up right away when my computer crashed. You helped me save an important deal!"?might suffice. As you move toward the people who are most important in your world, your letters become more focused. Think of your assistant, your direct reports, your key customers, and even your boss: When was the last time you told them how much you value their contributions??

It might seem overwhelming to thank everyone while you're waiting for the turkey to roast. If you incorporate the idea of writing thank-you letters, you can write them throughout the holiday season. Whenever you decide to share these epistles, both you and your recipients will benefit. You will gain from practicing gratitude, which has been proven to have physical, emotional, and even business benefits . Others will benefit from knowing they made a difference in your life.?