How To Write New Year Resolutions like a Pro!

Can I tell you a little secret? I love New Year Resolutions.

There is something so magical about the idea of "turning over a new leaf" with a new year. A blank page. Where...anything is possible.

Could we finally be more of who we always wished to be? Can we escape the gravity of our thoughts and habits to build a new future?

The wonderful news is that--yes, we can. And the not so wonderful news is--it's not so easy.

Based on my work as a leadership coach, let me introduce you to a few ways to get those New Year Resolutions to work for you

1. Start with Your Wishlist

We will always be capable of so much more than we are at any time. Always.

There is both comfort and realism in this.

On the one hand it means that we can always do more. On the other it's comforting to just know that just because we could have done more, doesn't mean we did less.

This is the place from where we will get ideas for our resolutions.

(Fun fact--most people end the process with this wish-list).

2. Pick 3 or 4 that Matter the Most.

You may not be able to do everything on your list this year. And that's okay.

Which of these really really matter to you at this time? A year later, which of these if accomplished would put you in a much better place than this year? How would you feel if you accomplished these?

Before you make up your mind, think of How Much they matter to you really, and Why. Whether you use your intuition or a more analytical approach, you should be able to pick those that really matter to you the most.

My personal favourite is to visualise what it would feel like a year later if I got these done. And then pick those that left me happiest.

This relatively short list should feel exciting. And a bit challenging.

Besides you may find a few things on your list that are easy to do anyway. Low hanging fruit is good too.

3. Build your Building Blocks: Knowledge, Effort, and Focus

"When you know better. You do better." Oprah

Sometimes we just don't know enough. This is particularly true of complex goals where many opinions rule. Think of knowledge about losing weight (keto/ intermittent fasting/ macro-counting). Or, building our savings (bonds/ deposits/ equity). Or building a business (should I focus on product/ marketing/ hiring/ raising money).

I wish this were simpler. Sometimes we get lucky and reach the right source of ideas soon. More often, we have to cycle through several before we find one that works. And that is never easy.

We are still early in the year, so no worries. Just make a note of the kinds of knowledge gaps you may need to fill. And (perhaps) your first thoughts on how.

Now to the most common visual when we think of someone achieving their goals. We think of someone who is disciplined, purposeful and focused. And all that is good. And hard.

There is a lovely hack though. The power of habit.

"Success is actually a short race—a sprint fueled by discipline just long enough for habit to kick in and take over". (Gary Keller, The One Thing)

It takes 66 days to build a habit. That is not very short. But not so long either.

"Every action you take is a vote for the person you wish to become" (James Clear, Atomic Habits)

4. What Will Get In The Way? Our De-railers: Ambivalences, and Trade-offs

This is where things get complicated.

We are human. We often think we want something. But sometimes (or often) we also want its opposite.

For instance, maybe you want to save more money. But you also want to upgrade your lifestyle.

Or you want to lose weight. But you also want to really enjoy great food.

Or you want to write a book. But you also want to spend time going out with friends.

There are after all trade-offs in everything. Which are you ready for?

And then there are often other hidden ambivalences.

Perhaps part of me wants to lose weight, but the other part just likes my curves after all. Or the other part worries about being trapped in a cultural idea of 'thin is beautiful' and is uneasy about it.

Or perhaps part of me wants to build a business, but the other part feels it would be equally nice to have lots of leisure time. Or the other part worries about getting caught up in a success is god culture that we don't really believe in.

Our ambivalences are part of being human. And are gloriously normal.

Acknowledging our ambivalences and then making choices is liberating. These ambivalences may never go away. But we can understand why we are being pulled back.

There is a caveat here. Deep seated ambivalences may indicate that the goals we have chosen are not the ones we really want.

5. The One Thing: Focus and Priority

Is there one (or even two) things you can do that will make it easier for you to accomplish your goals?

This idea comes from the Gary Keller's book (The One Thing). The central idea is that even great success comes from simply focusing on one thing at any given time. If you can identify the one thing you can do right now that will get you to your goals, it will lead to a domino effect, making everything else far easier.

“Your next step is simple. You are the first domino.” (Gary Keller, The One Thing)

And finally my favourite,

6. Coin a Slogan for the Year (Extra Credit)

You need a shorthand to remind you of the way you want to live out this year. Something that is catchy and energising and reflects you.

"Change begins here";

"Focus, focus, focus";

"Every day an adventure";

"Letting my light shine"

Advertisers have known about the power of a slogan for a long time.

A catchy slogan makes a home in your head. It reminds you of the spirit with which you want to live the year. It is fun and it is creative.

And it is meaningful--for you!

Thank you for reading all the way here. I wish you and your family a very happy 2023!

And if any of these have worked for you would love to hear in the comments

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(About me: I lead Unqbe, a research and advisory firm around the Future of Work. We partner with clients to help them understand change through commissioned research. And we help leadership teams build Workplace 2.0 with a current focus on re-building social capital; designing the hybrid workplace; and introducing a future-friendly inclusive leadership style)