How Well Do You Know Yourself and Your Anxiety?
Rebecca Pay ??
Kick-ass CV and resume writer for senior leaders and interim directors. ?? LinkedIn Top Voice.?? Neurodivergent AF mother. ?? ??Join Kick-ass Job Squad on Skool or see payforprecision.com for FREE CV writing pack.??
We all struggle from time to time to get over insecurities and be our real selves but why? I guess if your fa?ade or mask gets a negative response then you can tell yourself they don’t really know you, so it doesn’t matter. But then that also applies to anyone who loves you, it is not really you.
It is like falling for a character in a film, they don’t exist. If you meet the actor, you have no idea what they are really like as a person. It is not real. You love a portrayal not a real individual.
So, to have a true connection with someone you must be yourself. And this will lead to a degree of vulnerability. It is inevitable. If you are rejected it is the real you that is being rejected. This is where you need to really love who you are. The good and bad. The dark and the light. No one is perfect, in fact it is arguably the imperfections that we often fall for or are attracted to. The foibles and the intricacies of a person. And I include friendship as much as romance.
Therefore, you need to be honest with yourself about who you are to start with. And truly accept that person. Any parts you really don’t like you can work on, in fact my favourite type of people are a bit broken, but they are working hard to fix themselves. As long as you are recognising your flaws and trying to better yourself, you’re alright in my eyes.
As for me, I am a deeply empathetic person and I care about a lot of people; I want to help, and I want to support and I am full of a deep source of energy, which I share. This can be exhausting, and my anxiety revels in this energy depletion, and it is why I try and make time for myself. I haven’t given myself enough writing time lately as I have been so busy with clients, great for the bank balance but not so good for the energy balance.
I work hard to better myself and I am incredibly open, anyone who has chatted with me will probably laugh at that, as it’s so true. I guess we call it oversharing, but that seems like a negative connotation to me. I love hearing about what you really think or what you really want in life. Trust me I can discuss the weather till the cows come home but I think life starts when small talk stops.
So, what is the point of this article? I have had a tough week, busy with work and emotionally I feel drained as I am supporting a few friends which I have zero regrets about as it is needed and I know I will get that back in some way, that’s how it works. However, I haven’t had the time to put myself first. I have become frustrated by people’s reactions to me and in fact I know I am trying to give it all away when I need to keep some love for myself.
Recognising this is such a big step for me, rather than going into an anxiety meltdown and wondering why!
Time for some self-love ?? At the time of writing I am out with a friend tonight and tomorrow I am NOT working and next weekend I am at a spa. Are you having some true downtime this week?
Please be yourself. Please be more open. It is a beautiful place to be. I am reminding myself that I am not TOO kind or TOO open, I am just me and that’s more than enough.
If any fellow anxiety sufferers ever need a chat, my inbox is always open.
Senior Regenerative Agribusiness, Agroforestry, Nature Credits & Carbon Strategy, Compliance and ESG and Impact Investment
4 年No more fear .... i needed this reminder! Muito obrigada from Portugal. Happy Holidays!
Author of “Anxiety to Self-Absorption, speaker, copywriter, executive coach, idle thinker and sometime poet.
5 年Find out where the anxiety came from in my book.
Support Worker at High Hurlands Homes
5 年Hi Rebecca! First of all, big hugs to you! I have not been on social media lately as me and the boys are a bit under the weather. All on road to recovery now, though knowing the tasks at hand but not being able to do it, nor having the drive to do so makes me so anxious. Reading this makes me realise that I just need to move on. More focus than anxiety. Thanks...
Senior Account Manager @ Chili Piper | Advanced Digital Marketing & Driving Revenue Growth. The only Demand Conversion Platform
5 年I think I always classed anxiety quite wrongly. Keen to find out more. Thanks for sharing.
Creating ￡￡￡'s for cleaning businesses through Linkedin and joy through the power of comedy ??
5 年Great article Rebecca. I suffer with anxiety terribly at times. I've learned my triggers though and find that by keeping a close eye on those I can often prevent it occurring before it gets too much. And self talk helps a lot. Give myself a good lecture in the car, helps me to rationalise things.