How we can take control of our thoughts

Is there a topic that would be more beneficial to the quality of our lives, than understanding and practising how to run our mind, instead of our mind running us, at the highest possible level? 

At a level we didn’t realize was possible, because we’d never been exposed to this kind of information?

Once we leave the school system, we all get to choose what we learn about, what we study, what we put our time into mastering. This is a beautiful freedom we all share. 

We literally have the power to design ourselves and to live our lives at our utmost potential.

Some people do this; many do not. Others are unaware of just how much untapped potential they have lying dormant inside themselves. 

Why is that?

One reason is that we get caught up in the day to day managing of our lives. Our mind gets into a cycle. For some people this cycle is mainly negative. For others, it is ‘pretty good,’ but nowhere near the level of fulfilment and happiness they could be achieving. And for others, life is lived in a way in which they feel fulfilled in all areas of life. Where they experience bliss on a daily basis, by living congruently with their goals, and purpose, and values and vision completely aligned, in a way that positively impacts them and all of those they come into contact with. 

The difference that makes the difference in the quality of our lives, is within us. 

It is the way we run our mind. It is the quality of our habitual thoughts that we choose to focus on, which affect our habitual emotions, which determine our actions and therefore our outcomes in life.

The mind works like this: 

Thoughts enter the mind—we cannot control what thoughts enter. There are ways to slow the thoughts, and ways to calm the mind—but the main point I want to make at this stage is, we cannot control the thoughts that pop into our mind every day. (The subconscious filters we can bring into the conscious and change dramatically; this is a massive part of running our mind at the highest possible level, but not the focus of this article).

The fundamental point I want to make in this article, is this: 

We can decide whether to pay attention to each thought or not.

We can choose whether to believe each thought or not.

We can choose whether to focus on a thought—and we can also choose that a thought that enters our mind is not helpful at all, and destroy the thought!

We can choose! We have this freedom!

Our thoughts produce emotions. Emotions determine our actions. Our actions produce our life results. 

First, I will demonstrate a negative cycle, and then the antithesis that we can choose and condition through training—a positive cycle.

Negative thought cycle example:

A thought enters your mind: 

“I am not good enough to give a keynote speech at this event; I am not on the same level as the prestigious and highly educated audience at said event. I am an imposter!”

Now, if you choose to focus on this thought, and believe this thought, you will feel an emotion: 

maybe depressed, or anxious,

and frustrated with yourself for not studying harder so that you were ‘on the same level’ as the audience, 

and then you might get angry that you can’t do the speech, 

which means you will miss out on amazing business opportunities, 

which means you won’t make money, 

which means you won’t be providing for your family, 

which means you’re a bad husband and father/mother and wife…

and by the end of all these emotions you feel utterly worthless! 

All of these negative emotions you felt, because you decided to focus on just one negative thought!

But it gets worse.

Because of these emotions, you don’t take action, and then guess what happens? The thought becomes true!

You don’t do the speech because you let one negative thought control you!

Then, this result gets stored in your subconscious, and affects future thoughts! “Remember last time, you couldn’t even do a speech…see, you are worthless!”

The good news is this:

There is a myriad of ways and tools we can use to break this pattern.

I will give you one now:

Positive thought cycle example:

A thought enters your mind: 

“I am not good enough to give a keynote speech at this event; I am not on the same level as the prestigious and highly educated audience at said event. I am an imposter!”

You choose not to focus on this thought. You discard this thought. 

If you don't 'catch' the thought, you will definitely 'catch' the emotion! When this happens, the key is to backtrack from the emotion, to the thought. E.g., You feel the emotion 'anxious' in relation to your speech. Ask yourself 'what thought did I have that triggered this emotion?' Thoughts always preceed emotions.

You ask yourself a key question:

‘Is this thought going to help me to achieve what I want, or drag me down?’

(The simplicity in this question is deceiving, but is the essence of taking control of our mind. This is the question you need to ask every time you experience a negative thought).

The answer is obvious; it’s going to drag you down, so what do you do? 

Shoot the thought to the moon! Literally. In your mind. Blow it up like a bomb. See it blown apart into a million tiny pieces!

And instantly ask yourself a question:

‘What is a better, more accurate and intelligent thought, that will best serve me?’

Instantly replace this negative thought, after you shoot it to the moon in your mind, with a quality thought.

This is this article’s key message. 

Doing this creates a habit. If you commit to doing this for 30 days, it will become automated. A new positive habit. A cleaner way of processing information.

This is an example of a positive thought you could choose to replace the previous negative thought:

“Every single person on this planet is imperfect. We are all on this ride together and not one of us is better than anyone else. We all have different skills and abilities. I can absolutely make a speech, and I absolutely deserve to be there because I have life experiences some of these people couldn’t even dream of! I am someone in this world and I will not let fear, or something as tiny as a thought stop me from being the best version of myself and living my dreams!...Let’s GO! Get out of my way because I’m going to deliver a speech to the absolute best of my ability—and that is more than enough.”

Now, what emotion will you feel with this different thought? 

Probably extremely motivated,

and a lot calmer inside,

and confident

and excited….

All of these are a hell of a lot better than the emotion of worthlessness that was produced by the original negative thought!

Then, what action will you take? Will it be drastically different to the non-action taken by focusing on the negative thought?

Absolutely!

From a motivated, confident, calm, centred place you have an infinitely higher chance of achieving your goal, than in a place of worthlessness. This is indisputable!

Then, it gets better!

You take action, and therefore do your speech. 

It doesn’t matter if it’s not perfect.

You just made HUGE progress.

You proved to yourself what is possible by controlling your thoughts.

And you will store this in your subconscious, as a reference of how NOT WORTHLESS you are! Therefore, proving the original negative belief wrong! 

Incredibly simple; incredibly powerful.

That's it for today my friends :)

Remember, the 2 steps: 

When you notice a negative emotion, STOP, backtrack to the thought that produced it, and ask yourself: 

1.    ‘Is this thought going to help me to achieve what I want, or drag me down?’

2.    If it’s going to drag you down, shoot it to the moon, and instantly replace it with a more intelligent, quality thought, by asking yourself: 

‘What is a better, more accurate and intelligent thought, that will best serve me?’

Peace :)

Travis Simlinger is the founder of 'Progressive Coaching' in Zurich, Switzerland. Click here for more information.