How to Use Emotional Intelligence to be an Effective Leader

We often hear about IQ and technical skills taking the forefront in things such as annual performance reviews as well as professional development courses. But, are these the traits that will guarantee effective leadership? Well, not really. To your surprise or maybe not, emotional quotient (EQ) has been shown to be the best predictor of effective leadership.

So, what exactly is EQ? It can be broken down into four core skills, namely self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.

To provide some clarity, self-awareness is the ability to predict, perceive and be aware of your own emotions, while self-management is the ability to leverage your self-awareness to positively channel your behaviour. Social awareness is the ability to pick up on other’s emotions and understand what is going on, while relationship management is the ability to use your social awareness to successfully manage situations.

It is important to note that EQ has no direct correlation with a person’s IQ and unlike personality, which is hard-wired into us, EQ can be trained and developed over time.

So, why is it important? Well, as a business leader, it can help you navigate challenging situations such as contract negotiations and terminations and even positive ones likes company celebrations better.

The burning question then is why do so many leaders still lack EQ today? In part, it is because businesses assume that all their leaders will already have a high EQ. However, a good point to note is that the skills needed to rise to the top are often in contrast with the skills needed to be a good leader.

Companies often promote individuals for their knowledge and tenure, rather than their abilities to inspire others to excel. Even more so, once individuals become leaders, they often spend less time with their once-peers, which further decreases their natural EQ. It’s often lonely at the top, and easy to lose touch with the rest of your colleagues.

So, now that we know it is absolutely essential, how do we increase EQ? Well, you can’t get it from reading books and instruction manuals, it requires mindful practice. The first technique to use is to focus more on ‘we’ rather than ‘me’. It is important to fight the urge to only think of yourself and start to put the needs of others before yours.

The second is to use more personal forms of communication. This means more genuine human contact rather than hiding behind digital forms of communication. Making things happen means getting people to like you, respect you, listen to you and want to connect with you and the best way to do build this is by fostering genuine human contact.

Further reading:

https://www.inc.com/justin-bariso/13-things-emotionally-intelligent-people-do.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/emotional-intelligence