How traffic proves that people are inherently good

The incident

I was driving down the freeway the other day from a face-to-face client meeting. Yes, we still do those despite COVID 19 making everything virtual. It had been raining before the meeting and the road was still soaking.

A car indicated to merge into my lane and started moving across immediately. They were going to bash into my car, so I leaned on the horn for a few seconds until they moved back to their lane.

Now the first thought through everyone's mind is always 'that guy was just going to cut me off and push me out of the way, deliberately and with malice aforethought! The road is wet so why would you drive that irresponsibly?’ But he immediately apologized with the flash of the hazards. I must have just been in his blind spot.

That brings up my first point. There was no negative intention, simply an error in judgement and a swift apology just calmed me down from green Hulk level road rage to a calm 'ok, thanks that’s fine, you're forgiven'. Showing the intention (most often innocent and good) and apologizing can change an entire situation and the outcome. So why are so many people not willing to acknowledge a mistake, apologize and show their intention?

There seem to be something society that ties an apology to an error, being wrong and in an ever-competitive world that is seen as a form of weakness. This is not the mindset that will drive society into the future we want for our children. On the other hand, when we see someone do something that we cannot comprehend, if in our initial state of bewonderment we think ‘I wonder what his intention was’ in stead of assuming the worst we will naturally be in a more positive state of mind.  

I allowed the driver to merge; he showed his hazards again - thank you. I flashed my headlights - you're welcome and I drove on.

Then the accident

Further down the freeway there was an accident and the cars started to slow down. People kept changing lanes, not really helping them get anywhere quicker but you know how it is. Despite me thinking it is a pointless exercise I was still calm because of my experience just a few moments earlier. These drivers are not doing this to me. Their intention is not to deliberately get in my way. So, I let a few into my lane and there were a lot of hazard thank you and flashing you are welcomes. When I got close to the accident and needed to change lanes I indicted, someone let me in, I did the hazards, they did the flashing, and we were off on our merry way.

There are many studies and opinions on if people are inherently good or bad, so this helps prove a point. There are absolutely some drivers that do not have any regard for others and do what they want, cutting you off and literally placing everyone around them lives in danger. But on any given day there are over 250 000 cars that pass that point on the freeway. If there are one or two bad apples that still makes the vast majority good.

The world has been a tough place the last few months and we can often become negative and think people are inherently bad. That everyone is just out to get you or in it for themselves. That is simply not true. People are inherently good and if you look long enough and have the right mindset you will find their actions are loaded with good intentions, even if poorly executed.

Open a dialogue and understand why someone did what they did. This will serve us all well whether it be in the workplace or in our personal lives.

Good people in the workplace

I am going to stretch the point of good people a little further. I have been involved in a few start-ups and saw some phenomenal growth. In a start-up you will have times where the employee-workload ratio is not spot on and people are moved to functions that do not necessarily suit them just to plug a hole.

A few months later the business looks a lot different and somehow people think ‘that guy shouldn’t do that job’. Well guess what, that’s not what he signed up for, but he is doing his best. Its forgotten that he stepped out of his comfort zone to support the business when it was needed most. Not everyone is good for the position that they are in, but that does not mean they are not good for the organization.

In one of my previous companies someone was moved five times before they found the perfect position. I applaud that company for sticking with that employee and now they reap the benefits.

Find the good in people, back your people and if they are right for the business, they will deliver the results; they just need to be in the right position.

Photos supplied by: Jerin John, Sepp Rutz, and Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash