How to Thrive Through Intentional Change

Change is tough enough when you are forced into it by factors outside your control. But what about when you make the choice - and create that change intentionally? Surely the changes that we actively choose to make are easy ones, right? Nope!

Intentional Change – where you decide and are fully responsible for the change – can often be the most difficult and evoke the most conflicting emotions. Read on for 7 ways to help us thrive through those changes we create ourselves.

1/Remember your WHY?

Remember WHY you wanted to make the change – more importantly – what you hope will be different with the change - i.e., /what are you living into? Focus your thoughts on what that change will ideally bring you. Work toward the change?rather than away from what you are ending.?Remember your compelling WHY.

2/Gird Your Loins

Plan for a change that may be difficult, or well – messy. Being the one that precipitates a change (especially when it involves other people) can bring with it a degree of guilt and uncertainty, doubt, fear or even panic. You might think – why the heck did I …Especially when that change involves hard work. Plan for and accept having mixed feelings about the change and give yourself a heap of self-compassion when you are hit with differing emotions.

3/ Honour the Ending

Instead of thinking of the thing you are changing from as something that has ended, think of it as the first phase of the transition process to your new beginning. The ending is important to understand and appreciate as it is what got you to where you are now. William Bridges, author of the best-selling book Transitions, is big on ending with a ritual – creating something or some process for yourself that allows you to acknowledge, celebrate or perhaps even grieve what was, so that you can let it go. Key is to be sure not to rush through the ending and to simply notice and accept the conflicting emotions that you may be feeling.

4/ Stay Flexible

Rarely are the changes we make black and white situations or a fixed straight road to travel from A to B. Many different things may be required of you as you navigate this change. Sometimes you are going to have to swim, sometimes you need to float, and sometimes, you will feel like you are caught in a riptide…Don’t fight it…stay flexible and pivot where you need to keep moving forward.

5/ Trust?

Sometimes the change or way forward may seem very unclear. Trust that the “messy middle” is the living and the learning part of life. Accept that there will be uncertain times, tough days, but revisit your compelling “why” (see #1) and trust that you WILL come out the other side. You will move forward in the way you want.??

6/ Have Courage?

Making a change intentionally can feel both liberating and terrifying at the same time. It takes a huge amount of courage to choose to make a change. Though our instincts might be to try and counteract the discomfort of the transition, sometimes we just need to feel the feels and lean into the change. Just like you are rounding a corner on a motorcycle – lean into the curve.

7/ Ask for Support?

It takes energy, and commitment to intentionally make a decision that will be a significant life change. Even the most highly motivated of us need support. Set yourself up for success by getting an accountability partner - someone you trust and can share your vision, plans, emotions and progress with on an ongoing basis. And be sure to celebrate every incremental step of the change you are making.