How to Teach Adaptability

Let me start with a personal story about teaching adaptability to my own son.

He just turned 13 a few weeks ago.

Right now, he’s diving into all sorts of activities—animation club, voice acting, fencing, and more.

Back when life was “easy” for him, his days were unstructured, and everything fit neatly into place. Now? Not so much.

With so many interests and responsibilities competing for his time, things don’t always go as planned.

Sound familiar?

As adults, we experience the same thing. Unexpected shifts, tight schedules, and the reality that life doesn’t always cooperate.

And just like many professionals I coach, my son struggles with frustration when change happens too fast.

Then, earlier this week, we both got hit with a major curveball.

The owner of the house I’ve been renting for the past five years has decided to sell.

No lease renewal. No negotiation. Just… change.

I felt all the tough emotions... frustration, uncertainty, resistance.

I even shut down a little because I didn’t want to accept that I’d have to uproot the comfortable life we built here.

But my son? He took it even worse.

That was my wake-up call.

I realized that before I could teach him adaptability, I had to model it.

I needed to shift my own mindset first, so I could lead him through the change instead of just reacting to it.

And that’s exactly what we need to do when leading people at our work through change.

I mapped out 5 steps on How to Teach Adaptability.

Step 1: Shift the Mindset from “Change is Hard” to “Change is a Skill”

Most people resist change because they see it as an obstacle.

Instead, we need to view it as a skill that gets easier with practice.

AKA: Mastering Adaptability.

For example, my son saw his packed schedule as a problem.

Too much going on, too many unexpected changes.

One of my favorite strategies of all time is re-framing.

I reframed it for him: "Look at all these cool things you get to be part of. This isn’t a bad thing.. it’s an opportunity to learn how to manage change."

I brought up some past experiences that sucked in the moment, but once we worked through it, it actually ended up making us stronger and more resilient. When we reflect on past success, we realize we are already more adaptable than we think.

And I framed our house move as an opportunity to build our adaptability muscles.

Step 2: Make Change Feel Less Overwhelming

We also resist change when it feels too big, too fast.

I'm a huge fan of breaking things into smaller steps. I live my life by pomodoros. I focus on what can i do in 10-25 minutes. Then I stack those pomodoros over time consistently to get the results i desire.

When we first talked about moving, my son spiraled into worst-case scenario thinking. He was overwhelmed by the idea of everything changing at once.

We started to break it down. Taking one step and component at a time. I involved him in the process for looking for new places. "First, let’s make a list of what we love about our home so we can find something similar. Then, we’ll start looking at places. One step at a time."

Small wins create momentum.

Step 3: Model Adaptability in Real Time

The people around us are watching us. If we panic during change, they will too.

When I first heard the news about our house, I was stressed and resistant... and my son immediately mirrored that.

I realized that if I wanted him to handle it well, I had to go first.

So, I made a shift. Instead of reacting negatively, I said: "Okay, this is tough, but let’s focus on what we can control. Let’s treat this as an adventure."

His energy shifted instantly.

When leaders approach change with a problem-solving mindset, our teams follow.

Step 4: Create a Safe Space for Experimentation

Sometimes i wonder if people aren't resisting change.... maybe we fear failing in front of others.

If we can build an environment where it is okay to try, fail, and adjust, our peers (and ourselves) will be more willing to take risks.

When he started animation, he struggled at first and got frustrated with himself. He wanted to quit because he didn’t feel “good enough.”

I told him: "Every great animator was bad at first. You’re not failing... you’re learning."

By normalizing failure, he kept going.

When failure is treated as learning, adaptability becomes second nature.

Step 5: Recognize and Reward Adaptability

People repeat behaviors that get recognized. (for good or for bad). If we want adaptability to be part of our personal philosophy and our work culture, we need to celebrate it.

I decided to come up with some creative ways to recognize his "adaptability" in this house move.

Many times we just reward the result. I truly believe we need to reward the process more in order to build the habit of adaptability.

Imagine saying this:

• “I saw how you adjusted to the new system so quickly, that’s the mindset we need.”
• “You handled that unexpected challenge with a great attitude, thank you for being adaptable.”

A little recognition goes a long way.

ACTION TIME:

1. If you want the people around you to be adaptable, you need to model that behavior yourself. Be honest with yourself when change happens. Are you being adaptable or resistant?
2. A small change in words can go a LONG way to help our peers embrace change. Instead of saying “We’re changing everything about this process,” say, “This week, we’re testing one small improvement—let’s see how it goes.”
3. Involve your peers in the process of change. "Here’s the challenge. Let’s figure out the best way forward together." When people have a say in how change happens, they’re more likely to support it instead of fight it.

Thank you for taking a few moments with me in today's article. I had to learn adaptability in real time myself this week... I hope this story inspires you to be more adaptable and model this behavior with your peers. I promise to continue to provide fresh, actionable content... week after week, on the topic of growth and learning in the workplace. And sometimes... these strategies will help our home life as well! I appreciate you!

-Your Friend,

Dan