?? How Not to be Taken for Granted

If you're reading this, chances are you fall into one of three distinct categories in the world of corporate communication. Let's dive deep into each one and uncover some thought-provoking discoveries along the way.

Category 1: The People-Pleasers

Do you often find it challenging to say 'no' at work? You're the empathetic soul who prioritizes others' needs over your own. On the outside, you're the agreeable team player everyone loves. But deep down, you feel undervalued and locked in an internal battle. You feel afraid of standing up for yourself because you worry about hurting the other person’s feelings.

So, how is it that you can maintain your caring nature while asserting your own needs? Is there a balance that allows you to be kind without feeling taken for granted?

Category 2: The Blunt Truth-Tellers

Are you the no-nonsense, tell-it-like-it-is person at the office? Do you find it hard not to express yourself, even if it risks offending others? Your intentions are pure, but sometimes your straightforwardness leads to conflicts and misunderstandings. Are you looking for a way to be honest without being perceived as inconsiderate or tone-deaf?

How can you convey the truth without the sugar coating, yet avoid unnecessary conflicts? Can you find a middle ground between being frank and being polite?

Category 3: The Balanced Explorers

For those of you who seek a middle ground between extreme agreeableness and bluntness, you're the diplomats of the corporate world. You navigate tricky situations with finesse, but sometimes there's no avoiding leaning toward one extreme or the other.?

How can you maintain this balance while ensuring your voice is heard when necessary?

In a world where 'nice' can sometimes feel like a synonym for 'doormat,' it's crucial to strike the balance between being accommodating and assertive. Let's dive into 4 simple and practical ways on 'How Not to be Taken for Granted?':

1. Face Your Biggest Fear with a Twist

Ever felt overwhelmed, but hesitated to say "No"? Here's how to do it gracefully:

Acknowledge and Explain: Appreciate the offer, then politely state your reasons. Be concise and to the point. No need to over-justify or over explain your reasons. Keep it short, simple, honest, and open-ended.

“I am grateful you thought that I could be a part of this. I would have loved to do this for you, had it not been for Project X holding me back.”

2. Seek Clear Expectations

Many times ‘nice’ people struggle with seeking clarity, even when they need it; just because they don’t want to be a bother. And they compensate for that lack of clarity by being ‘extra-nice.’?

Ask for Clarity: Don't be afraid to discuss your roles and responsibilities with your superiors. Once you know what you’re aiming for, it becomes much easier to navigate through your internal emotions.?

Now, conversations such as these might seem intimidating at first - but there is no other way to approach them other than by taking the bull by its horns. Intelligent communicators understand that asking for clarity on your roles and responsibilities is not a sign of laziness; rather that of respect because at the end of the day, it ends up saving everyone involved that much more time and energy; leading to much faster and much more effective results.?

The best way to seek clarity is to begin by paraphrasing what you have understood, and add your question regarding what you find confusing towards the end.

“I have understood that my deliverables are A, B, and C. Would you also want me to focus on item X; or would you first want me to finish the first three deliverables and circle back?”

3. Pat Yourself on the Back?

One of the biggest reasons ‘nice’ people find themselves in a constant loop of not being able to say ‘NO’ and being taken for granted is because every time they make a mistake, they find themselves guilt-tripping.?

Guilt is a low-frequency emotion and it takes away your energy from much more important things; such as actually using the mistake to learn what you could change and do better the next time.?

As important as it is to not engage in blame-games, it is equally important for you to pat yourself on the back, everytime you find yourself doing something worth acknowledging. We want people to acknowledge us because we’re hard-working, committed, and drive the results needed. But humor me this - if you don’t appreciate yourself, how do you expect anyone else to fill in those shoes for you?

The first person that you need to convince that you’re a good person who deserves recognition and acknowledgement is no one but you yourself.?

At the end of each day, start journaling:

1. What went well? What would I like to pat myself on the back for?
2. WWW - What Went Wrong; and how can I do this better the next time?

4. Get a Mentor

Mentors see in you, what even you don’t see in yourself - be that in terms of your blind spots, or your dormant strengths.?

Find a mentor who can help you reverse the negative aspects of being nice, and conserve the constructive aspects of being one.?

Finding the right mentor is all about finding the connection and alignment among your needs with the kind of success stories your mentor has created.?

Go, and read success stories, testimonials, book strategy sessions, and ask questions so that you can find someone who can truly help you uncover your real potential.?

And if you want me to help you become an Intelligent Communicator, well then all you need to do is click the link in the comments and book your FREE 1-0-1 Strategy Session with our Program Specialist.?

And as always, don’t forget to share your thoughts on this in the comments below!