How to Stop Negative Self-talk

I want to speak to you about all of us want yet struggle with to a greater or lesser degree. I'm talking about self-confidence, courage, charisma, commitment, and how to overcome the opposite; the dark side of those virtues.

The opposite of these, are fear, doubt, anxiety, low self-worth and that nagging inner voice that behaves like a dirty needle on the disk of an old record player. It's repeating the same old and false story that you have been telling yourself for much too long. You know that inner voice, yes? We all have that inner voice. There is one that speaks the truth, but then there is the other one that so often overpowers the voice of truth because it shouts much louder. And that voice shouts FEAR. That voice shouts Doubt, Anxiety, Caution, and "Come on, be realistic!" Yes?

I've got a little bit of a lesson from my 5-year old granddaughter.

I spent some time with her the other day. We took a walk on the beach and ventured into the dunes where all kinds of little creatures, prickles, and other hidden objects reside that could sting, or hurt. So I cautioned her about certain things, but she was fearless. She wanted to explore and experience something new. No danger existed in her mind. Of course, she didn't have any negative experiences yet, or at least if she had them in the past, they didn't stick with her. She was naturally courageous and wanting to explore. Seeing her being fully engaged in what she really wanted, taught me a lesson and I want to share it with you.

You and I already know that lesson, yet we often forget and have to be made aware over and over again. We still grapple with Fear. What is it that makes us so afraid? If it is prime of fear, we can never get rid of that kind of fear, and we don't want to because that's the fear that keeps us safe; safe in a way that keeps us from disaster and death. Thank God (or thank Evolution) for that.

We needed it to make it through the ages, and still need that kind of primal fear so that we don't jump off a cliff. This is the primary fear; it is very real and it gets triggered when your nervous system detects immediate danger. We cannot even reason with that. It is there and it will always be there in the moment when it's necessary.

But then there is that other fear, the fear that has been planted into our subconscious mind. Those were experiences we were told about. For example:

 How to be, what not to do, what we must do

And of course the warnings: to be careful about this or the other thing. And that caution, that fear, that anxiety that comes up from your subconscious mind so often paralyzes us.

Are you experiencing that right now? There may be something in your life that you really would like to experience. And yet the moment that desire comes up in your heart (and it comes from the depths of your soul and your heart) that moment also triggers the counterpart that resides in your brain. See if you recognize any of the triggers that your brain injects: it's the anxiety, fear, and soundbites like: "who am I to be able to have this or deserve this" "This is not going to happen" "That's not possible for me" Because... I am too old or too young, or too fat, or too stupid (yes, you even think that about yourself, yes?) There are thousands of reasons that instantly come up preventing you from experiencing something new and exciting. How sad is that?

All of these anxieties, all of these so-called voices of reason would keep you exactly in the status quo, would keep you exactly where you are now. What are you going to do about this? I guess that this is not what you want to keep experiencing, correct? Don't you want to experience all that You can experience?

You are a magnificent woman who wants to experience love and prosperity and joy and live with purpose. What if you could experience the full power of your life force so that you can joyfully create the life that is abundant and fulfilling. That life is real, and it is waiting to be claimed by you.

What is the barrier? The barrier is your doubt, your anxieties, and your fears. So I want you to do this little exercise with me now, and on your own later whenever this comes up.

Acknowledge your true desires and know what you want deep down in your heart. You know exactly why you are here, You know what you want, and you also want to explore things that you don't even know yet that you want. Your unapologetic, original self has the courage and the will to experience anything that you are naturally drawn to. And if you are unclear about what that is, I am here to help you get the clarity about what you really, really want.

Right now is the perfect time to break free. It's time to experience all that you are. It's time to let out the magnificent, untamed and unapologetic woman that you really are. So how do you do this? You cannot do it alone...well it could take decades of trial and error and frustration, and going around in circles. How exhausting!

Yes, you need a trusted, experienced and highly dedicated coach or mentor; you need me to help you get it done. Are you ready to take the first step to your freedom and fulfillment? You may be ready because you are still reading, you are still with me and I am here for you. Yet if this is not your time yet, listen to one of my nuggets that will already help you.

This one nugget is a golden nugget.

When this inner negative rhetoric comes up again, ask yourself these questions: Well, there are actually five questions that you have to ask yourself, but I don't want to go into all of those now. I just want to give you this golden nugget that will help you enormously already.

When this doubt, anxiety, and fear come up... What if you see it almost like a little child, like something that comes out of you but is really immature because it is immature; it's a lie that your frightened mind creates. It does not come from your soul, not from the wisdom, definitely not from the wisdom and the abundance and the truth of who you really are. So then treat the phrase or image or feeling like a child that is unruly. Or see it as this big ugly person that comes up and tries to overpower you.

Say, stop! Stop it right now!. I'm not going to listen to you anymore.

I don't answer to you anymore. I have another partner that I listen to now and that partner is:  courage is confidence and it's also security. Security resides within you.

There is no real security outside of you. This is another story.

So just experience this. When this anxiety or fear or doubt, this low self-worth, all of the negativity comes up, just say to yourself, STOP! I don't listen to you any longer. I don't answer to you anymore. You have no power over me. I chose another partner. If you would say that, try it and let me know how this works for you. Okay?

P.S How to imagine, embrace and become intrinsically connected with your wise and most powerful Soul-Self is part of the training that my clients become skillful at.

P.P. S. Text me or email me at. [email protected] if you want to get more of my articles on Self Development, Relationship Secrets, Kick-Ass Happiness and Wellness, send me an email with the subject line words: 

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