How to start a conversation with anyone?

How to start a conversation with anyone?

“I don't know how to start conversations? What do I do?”

Think of the last conversation you had with someone you didn’t know. Did you find certain moments to be awkward? Especially the part where one of you had to start the conversation?

Whether it’s engaging someone over the dinner table, meeting someone at a party or exchanging a kind word in the elevator, starting a conversation can be more intimidating than it looks.

Here are 5 ideas you can use to skip the awkwardness and spark your next conversation with confidence:

1) Acknowledge The Person With A Genuine Compliment

You always want to start the conversation by making it about them. It shows you’re genuinely interested in who they are. After all, everyone enjoys the company of someone who makes them feel good about themselves, right?

Eg: I love what you are wearing. I found what you shared earlier to be super interesting.

Important Note: If you’re sharing a compliment, observe and keep it real. There’s nothing worse than a fake compliment.


2) Find Common Ground

Everything changes the moment someone realizes you and them have something in common.

The easiest common ground is the weather or the place you both are at. But don’t be afraid to dig deeper for more similarities - maybe you share similar passions, follow a similar sport, work in similar roles or feel pretty similarly about a current event.

Everyone has something in common. Your job is to discover what that is.


3) Focus On How They’re Feeling Instead Of What They’re Doing

The best way to do this is to start with how you’re feeling. People want to know the real you so they can express the real them. When you share vulnerably, you give the other person the opportunity to do the same. Eg: I had a really long day at work and I feel super exhausted. How about you?


4) Stay Curious With Open-ended Questions

When you’re in a group of people, you don’t always need to start the conversation by speaking first. Listening intently and following it up with an open-ended question is a great way to spark the conversation.

Eg: When was the last time you saw that movie? What do you think kept you going in that moment?


5) Listen Actively and Maintain Eye Contact

Starting a conversation does not happen only through words. You also speak through your eyes and your silences. There’s nothing more engaging than a curious listener. And if you are willing to stay present, you will learn much more about someone than what they’re words have conveyed.


In the dance of conversation, your words are the steps that lead to connection. Remember, every chat is a chance to light up someone's day. So dive in with a smile, a genuine compliment, and a curious heart. You've got this

Lakshmi Ravikumar

Manifestation Coach/15 years of Manifestation Mastery/ LOA Coach/Ho'oponopono Coach/30 days Life Transformation challenge

4 个月

Reminds me of the first ever Life coaching event I attended in 1995. I used too cling to my husband in new environments. He slipped away and I stood terrified for about 20 minutes waiting for him to return. When I finally realised what he was upto, I smiled at the girl standing next to me , who looked just as lost. We introduced ourselves, Inwas a banker, so was her dad, her home was right opposite where I worked, and so on... That day I got that people are all nervous, waiting for us to make the first move.

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Emma Jane Sandford

ICF Accredited Life & Mindset Coach ?

9 个月

Great post, and something many people find intimidating. I try to remember that confidence comes primarily from competence, which comes from doing the damn thing. And then doing it again, and again and again!

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