How To Start and Continue Conversations About Mental Health with Loved Ones

Mental health and well-being are key aspects of a person’s total health. Yet, for many individuals, having conversations around these topics can be incredibly difficult. Whether due to the stigma associated with mental health issues or just a lack of knowledge on where to begin, talking about the topic can be uncomfortable for some. It can be easier said than done, but simply being open to having these conversations can make all the difference.

Thankfully, since the onset of the pandemic, people are becoming more accustomed to and comfortable with conversations about mental health. A CVS Health and Morning Consult study from earlier this year found that most people agree that society has become more comfortable engaging in mental health discussions (56%) since the pandemic began — a trend I am hopeful will only continue to grow.

Now, as we head into the holiday season, we have an opportunity to start or keep these conversations going. However, if you are struggling with how to check in with your loved ones or with initiating discussions around the topic, there are some pointers you can keep in mind.

Initiating the conversation

For many, asking someone about their emotional state or any issues they may have might not come so easily. If this is the case for you, simply start by checking in on your friends or loved ones and asking to catch up. By starting a conversation unrelated to a person’s mental health, you may find an opening to ask in a more “casual” way that can be more comfortable for both parties.

Feel free to kindly point out if they’ve displayed a difference in behaviors or if you’ve noticed a change in them and recognize if they are going through a challenging time (i.e., if they’ve lost their job recently, are grieving the loss of a loved one, etc.). Let them know you are paying attention, that you care and are there to lend a listening ear and support them.?

Listen carefully and show understanding

Lend a listening ear to your loved ones and encourage them to continue speaking. Let them know you are paying attention by using phrases like “I understand” or “take your time” if they hesitate. Try not to interrupt them when they speak, and instead, leave comments until the end.

It’s also important to use positive body language during the conversation. For example, keep eye contact and nod your head to show you are listening. Lastly, remember to stay calm. While some of the things they bring up could be worrisome, strong reactions could make some individuals shut down.

Let them know you are there to support them

Reassure your loved ones that they are not alone, that you want to be there for them and that things can get better with the proper tools, resources and care. Ask them what you can do to help them and encourage them to take small steps to improve their mental health and well-being. Together, you can brainstorm how they can incorporate practices that benefit their well-being into their daily lives. This can include establishing a routine that involves physical exercise and healthy eating, mindfulness practices, time for self-care and more.

Remind them that they do not need to wait to seek help and that preventive mental health care can be incredibly beneficial. Point them to tangible resources that aim to provide people with the tools they need to take charge of and prioritize their mental health. You can find a list of helpful resources, tools and organizations on CVS Health’s Mental Health and Well-being page.

Lastly, remember that 988—the 3-digit number for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline—is available if you feel someone needs immediate support. You can call together or on behalf of someone else to learn how to help someone in crisis.

Follow up and continue to advocate for their well-being

Mental health conversations are not one-and-done. Keep the momentum going by following up with your loved ones and checking in after your conversation. Reach out and ask them how they have been doing and let them know that you are there for them should they need your support.?

Encourage them to continue (and expand!) the conversation. Let them know that you are there for them but that reaching out to others can also benefit their well-being. By expanding the conversation to other loved ones, they can better equip themselves and their family members, friends and others with the tools needed to support those struggling and continue normalizing conversations around the topic across society.

As the holiday season ramps up and we have the opportunity to gather with friends, family and loved ones, I encourage you to foster conversations around mental health—you never know who might need them.?