How to Share Your Mental Health Story with Meloney Hendricks
Kimberly Spencer ??
Founder of Crown Yourself? ?? CEO, Communication Queens Agency ???TED?, Helping visionary leaders boldly build their empire + stand out visibly in your industry with confidence, clarity, & courage ??
In this episode of the Communication Queens podcast, I coach Meloney Hendricks, founder of Dopamine on the Rocks.?
Meloney shares her journey as a neurodivergent single mother and mental health advocate, discussing her experiences with bipolar disorder and suicidal ideations.
She talks about the importance of sharing personal stories and breaking the silence around mental health, particularly in the Caribbean community.
We also discuss the power of community, the concept of limitless potential, and the importance of lifting others as we rise.?
Meloney's mission is to help women who have been labeled with a mental health diagnosis, emphasizing that individuals are more than their diagnosis.
Meloney Hendricks was the winner of our Social media challenge for the Communication Queen's monthly Podcast Party. Want to get in on the party??Register here.
Enjoy this episode & transcript below where I interview Meloney Hendricks, founder of Dopamine on the Rocks. If you've ever wondered how to share your story when you feel like you have this huge, giant, bubbling, burgeoning purpose that came from some of your darkest moments and how you want to lean into that purpose and that light and the glory of what it is that you see for your future. This episode is for you.
What You'll Learn:
FYI Transcripts may contain a few typos. With many episodes lasting 30-minutes, it can be difficult to catch minor errors. Enjoy!
Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podcast Addict, Castbox, Amazon Music, iHeart Radio, Pandora, Youtube, or on your favorite podcast platform.
Kimberly Spencer (00:00:00) - Welcome back to the Communication Queens podcast. In this episode, I am coaching Meloney Hendricks, founder of dopamine on the rocks. If you've ever wondered how to share your story when you feel like you have this huge, giant, bubbling, burgeoning purpose that came from some of your darkest moments and how you want to lean into that purpose and that light and the glory of what it is that you see for your future. This episode is for you. Meloney Hendricks was one of our podcast party attendees. Now, if you're new to the Communication Queens realm, we host a monthly podcasting party for our members, and the first one that you attend is totally free so you can come and meet other podcasters. Get booked on podcasts. About 90% of our attendees end up getting booked on at least one, if not multiple, podcasts from the party. And Meloney came and she shared her story of being a neurodivergent mother and mental health advocate. And she won our social media challenge. And her prize was a live storytelling coaching session that would go on the Communication Queens podcast so that you could benefit because what is personal is universal.
Kimberly Spencer (00:01:07) - And when we hear someone else's story, subconsciously, it allows for us to reflect on how we can better share our own, to create the income and the impact that we want. I was so excited to get to coach her because dang, this queen went through some hell and still came out with such a beautiful, light and positive mindset on the other side of it and is now serving with her blog, dopamine on the rocks to help other women in the Caribbean who have been labeled with a mental health diagnosis to eradicate the stigma and start sharing openly and vulnerable about their experiences building a community of support. Now, I will drop a trigger warning that in this podcast we do discuss a mental health diagnosis of bipolar disorder as well as suicidal ideations and how to share your story around this. The podcast is meant for entertainment and educational purposes only, so this is not meant to diagnose or to treat you in any way, shape or form. And if you are struggling with any of this, please seek out professional help.
Kimberly Spencer (00:02:11) - Every story on this podcast is built on lived experience and is not meant to be a substitute for professional advice. So with that, I want you to pay attention and listen to how Meloney shares her story in the beginning compared to how she starts sharing it in the end, when she gets into allowing us to see the dark and the challenges, as well as her beautiful light that she has for her purpose moving forward. And with that, I give you Meloney Hendrix. Welcome to the Communication Queens podcast for the visionary leaders, speakers, service providers and podcasters who are looking to stand out sharing their story. I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, former screenwriter turned master communications coach. On this podcast, I'll be coaching you on how to share your own transformation story so that you increase your visibility, influence, and income on podcast interviews. Let's get your voice heard. Meloney. Welcome to the Communication Queens podcast. I'm so excited and honored you were our winner from our podcasting party Social Media Challenge. I'm assuming you didn't.
Kimberly Spencer (00:03:23) - You did like the best post that I've seen on Instagram sharing about your podcast party experience. Oh really?
Meloney Hendricks (00:03:30) - And thank you so much. To be honest, I don't even remember what I wrote, but it came from the heart. It was. It was.
Kimberly Spencer (00:03:36) - Great. The graphics were great, like you made a thing of it and I was like, she is a queen.
Meloney Hendricks (00:03:43) - Thank you so much. Maybe that's why I got into blogging because I couldn't write. Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:03:49) - So tell us about your blog, who you are, what you do. Begin the process of hearing your story and getting you communicating like a queen.
Meloney Hendricks (00:03:58) - Oh sure. Sure. Definitely. So I would say picture this A Caribbean mom navigating life with bipolar, refusing to let labels define her. And I will say in a nutshell, that is me. So I'm just here to share with your audience about that. Hey, I've been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and there's somebody else out there who may have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder or something else.
Meloney Hendricks (00:04:29) - And I'm here to let you know that you are more than your diagnosis. You're more than a stigma. You're more than labels that society has thrown on you. And we are just here about creating a space where it's okay to be flawed and absolutely fabulous. Amen.
Kimberly Spencer (00:04:46) - I'm Meloney, I love your mission and your message, and one of the things that I would love to hear a little bit more from your story is like. Imagine like you are creating setting up a scene for a movie.
Meloney Hendricks (00:05:03) - We had.
Kimberly Spencer (00:05:04) - What were the what were those moments? Before receiving the diagnosis. What made you go seek out that support and then walk me through the moments of what happened after, especially since I know you're a mom and mom, so you have there's a whole lot that's there. Then we didn't get to get to capture that juiciness.
Meloney Hendricks (00:05:29) - No, it's funny that you actually say that. Imagine that it's a whole movie, because that's something that my friend Sarah and I do that we talk about, like we said, okay, we are the main character for a movie, and every little piece of it just makes it more interesting.
Meloney Hendricks (00:05:41) - So yeah, and before dopamine on the rocks and all of this, like I would say, I felt like I was a. On silica every day kind of gal. You know, I knew I was different. I knew that I was destined for something great. Um, but to be honest, I was too shy. I was too reserved. I was too, um, to knit. I would say make it perfect, make it clear. You know, I'm a mom trying to to to make my kids happy and my partner happy, and I'm trying to make my boss happy. And in all, I'm trying all these things along the way, trying to see where I fit in, how can I serve, how can I contribute and just. And I know I just couldn't pinpoint what it was. Um. God, I definitely think that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:42) - Yeah, because.
Meloney Hendricks (00:06:44) - I'm just curious.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:45) - If you were to. Walk me through the steps that led you to. Because obviously you've tied such a deep amount of purpose to what you're doing.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:56) - And there was a moment when you receive that diagnosis. Just tell me about that.
Meloney Hendricks (00:07:05) - That moment. I was. Angry. I was utterly angry and to be honest, my doctor at the time got the brunt of my anger. Because I'm like, God damn it. Another thing, another thing that I have to deal with because I'm like, God, like, give me a break. Like how much things that a person have to deal with. No, like, I, like I said, I was, I'm a I was the reserved child. I was very quiet, but I knew that there was this big voice in me that need to come out. And, you know, I had my daughter when I was a teenager and shortly after she was born, two weeks after her father passed away, he was robbed and killed on his way home. Yeah, and I had to deal with that. And I had to move back to my home country, the Virgin Islands. So, um, dealing with.
Meloney Hendricks (00:08:06) - Okay, growing up in Jamaica and on the Virgin Islands. And I have to try to understand the culture. It's very smaller in on ascendant people trying to figure out what am I doing? You know, I had this new baby and trying to figure out myself, I have to figure out how to parent by myself, you know, all of these things. And I would just when I think, okay, I got to handle everything, okay? I'm flowing. I'm getting the momentum. It's like your engine is finally running and it's like another roadblock. I'm like, darn it. Really, really. God. Really. I think we have this kind of conversations all the time. And here was like, really another thing? Another thing like you couldn't you can choose somebody else. Why me? Why me? I don't want to be your strongest shoulder. Can you let one of your other soldiers, like, deal with this, you know? So during that moment, I was very, very angry.
Meloney Hendricks (00:09:08) - And I'm like. I felt utterly defeated. Utterly defeated because I'm like that's it. Mhm. Nobody gonna label me crazy. He just does this. Does this just throw me away at this point it just throw me away at this point because it's like there's no matter how much I try, I'm not gonna win. There's always something like pulling me back. But I would say. That fighter in me wouldn't allow it. You know that that that voice that wanted to speak all of this time would not alone. Because she was like, hey, this is just another thing. Look at all these other things that you you triumphed over. You could get over this girl, you know, all of these things throughout your lives has made you stronger. You know, it doesn't make you, you know, fragile. You know, it doesn't make you fragile. It doesn't make you less than. I think it's one of these, like I said, all these labels that we put on ourselves because of what has happened to us.
Meloney Hendricks (00:10:17) - You know, instead of having these little badges of honor like, hey, I went through this thing, we make it, we take away from our words and from our value until we feel that we're nothing. I'm truly grateful for my diagnosis, and that sounds weird because they may think I'm. I am wrong. I mean, how long.
Kimberly Spencer (00:10:39) - Did it take you to get to that point?
Meloney Hendricks (00:10:42) - There to to to to to be here.
Kimberly Spencer (00:10:45) - That anger to being grateful.
Meloney Hendricks (00:10:47) - I would say. I would say about six months, six months. And I'm still learning. It's still a learning. But I'll say that I've got from my gut going from that point of complete defeated ness, because there was a point where I was like, okay, I don't want to live here anymore. You know, I can't do life anymore. It's too hard. You know, praying and asking God at this same window. I don't know what I feel like. Can I be done with living in also? Um, coming from that space and just pouring in.
Meloney Hendricks (00:11:30) - I had to anchor myself. I would say my kids were my anchor in that look you had. You have to find something that kind of pulls you through, you know, something, anything, anything even. It's just to get out of your bed in the morning, something to get you through to the next day. And for me, it was my kids because I said my daughter last lost her father when she was two weeks old, and I couldn't bear the thought of just leaving her. You know. You know this work, leaving her by herself. So there is no other option I have to pull through. If it's not for me, that is for her. And then it came to a point where I couldn't do it for them anymore. I had to do it for me. And that's when I truly found my strength, when I decided to do things for me. Um, I think we we do for what else? So much. And we don't do it for ourselves.
Kimberly Spencer (00:12:26) - Meloney, I think one of the things that I love about the the your story, um, and I want to bring light to this is when you first started off, when I first asked you to tell you, you led with your purpose.
Kimberly Spencer (00:12:40) - You led with this, this light, this heart, you know, oh, you have a diagnosis and you're eradicating that stigma. But one of the things is we humans are minds cannot see. The gap like we need to have that picture painted for us. And now your light of what you've been able to achieve, how you've been able to evolve and grow, and your level of resilience. Does it by highlighting the darkness of your story and the challenges of your story and oh my gosh, like to lose your husband when you're a new mom with a new two week old child. And that way. That compiled the move, compiled with then on top of it, getting the like all of those pieces. Those. It create an in the audience that creates meaning created in me. And I know for sure it created in the audience a sense of empathy, of deep empathy for what it is that you stand for. And now we can connect the dots logically with our brain, because you've invited us on this journey of understanding.
Kimberly Spencer (00:13:57) - So I would encourage you on any podcasts. You go on to really allow yourself to paint the picture of where you started. And then grow into that moment because you had the most powerful word. You said, but. And you said nothing for. So often I tell people to get their big butts out of their way because it was, but can typically be excuses. But yours, yours was. I felt so defeated, I felt this I, you know, you were on the brink. With your mental health and feeling like you wanted to leave this world. My God.
Meloney Hendricks (00:14:38) - And you had the.
Kimberly Spencer (00:14:40) - But and that but was just like I felt it in my soul. It was. It was deep and it was. It pulled me and so. It what you do by sharing that darkness and the glorious. But that is that that pivot where you made a new decision. Loophole that highlights and makes your message resonate even deeper.
Meloney Hendricks (00:15:14) - Definitely, definitely got that. And as I'm hearing you talk about that now, how my mind works, I'm like, okay, why didn't I do that? Because I like to ask questions and explore myself even further.
Meloney Hendricks (00:15:26) - I'm like, okay, that's a conditioning. Um, especially here in the Virgin Islands, though. It's a cultural thing, and I think all across the world, but especially here in such a small community, we have been trained to to only show our best side and all in darkness, whatever we are going through that's left at home or just for us. And, and that's why I'm so passionate about sharing my story. And I'm like, I'm listening to you. And I was like, I'm so passionate about sharing my story, my journey that I forget to share my story. Right. And that's what I find that people here in the Caribbean struggle with, too. We are taught to put the best, our best self forward. We don't show the ugly side and that's why we continue to suffer in silence. And then later to.
Kimberly Spencer (00:16:24) - It's our our unconscious minds. We want to maintain a perception of being a part of the tribe, because biologically, if we feel like we're the outcast, then that's unsafe, right? And so.
Kimberly Spencer (00:16:41) - And by being able to pave the way and be that pioneer that you are in showing the face of your true story and not. Trying to, you know, just put the best foot forward of how inspiring you are and how, you know, you had the diagnosis and now you have such a big purpose. There's like a there's a six month gap from that moment, but there's also the whole backstory behind that to help.
Meloney Hendricks (00:17:10) - 29 years. Yeah, yeah, it's 99 years of backstory.
Kimberly Spencer (00:17:18) - Yeah. So with. That. What do you see as being a benefit to sharing your story by also highlighting the darker parts of your story?
Meloney Hendricks (00:17:33) - I'm. You touched on it a bit before and when you said tribe. And that's something that I like to share with other people, is that you have to find your tribe, and sometimes your tribe exists outside of the one that you were born into. It's on the black community. Like, I am so thankful for my friends, for my family and anybody else that I meet.
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Meloney Hendricks (00:17:57) - Like, our community is really. Oh my gosh. I'm trying not to get emotional. Like thinking about this like, no, no, don't don't.
Kimberly Spencer (00:18:08) - Say allow yourself to go there because then you actually allow the audience to go there. Emotions are its energy and emotion, and especially if you're feeling. So let it out, sister.
Meloney Hendricks (00:18:20) - Really? But an hour. Oh I will. Oh, will. Try not to cry. Try not to cry.
Kimberly Spencer (00:18:27) - Take a deep breath. Take a deep breath. And I want you to feel into that space of what community means to you.
Meloney Hendricks (00:18:33) - Right. Like, coming into what community means for me is. But those who have felt labeled. Especially if you're a mom or a parent grappling with like, mental health diagnoses. It's like it's a it's a place for personal growth seekers, like. But I've grown so much because of the people around me. Because of their stories too, because of the tools that they they use and they implement and get to, you know, take little nuggets from them here and there and like, it's like adding on to my service, like we're all a part of this big puzzle.
Meloney Hendricks (00:19:19) - And. All of the pieces fits in a sense like your piece might fit me and my piece might fit you, and we are just exchanging these pieces to make one big, beautiful picture. I don't know if that makes sense. Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:19:32) - Yeah.
Meloney Hendricks (00:19:34) - Like this exchange, like, hey, I need to borrow this piece because I'm painting this picture over here. Oh, you need this picture over here. Here. Take a piece from me. So that's where that's what community means for me. It's like a continuous giving and receiving. I think we're so caught up into take, take, take and, you know, like to truly give off yourself in a vulnerable way, in a safe environment where you feel heard and seen. But as a person to say, hey, I see you, I get you, I love you regardless, and I will forever love you to how much you change, you know? That to me is what community means. And that's why I try my best to to offer in small ways.
Kimberly Spencer (00:20:21) - So you, as a leader of dopamine on the rocks and what you're what you're creating. You just said something incredibly powerful, you know, giving people the safe space to be seen. And if you're leading this. This movement in the Caribbean, which I love, that you're doing if you're leading this movement. Then by you sharing your story in a way that you're actually allowing your. The darker parts of your story, the more the challenge is to pave and pioneer the way. Instead of just putting that best foot forward, you're actually giving your followers permission to do the same. Oh. Because you are being that example and you're setting the tone as a leader. Bye bye and in how you communicate.
Meloney Hendricks (00:21:24) - Well. That is so powerful. Trees so powerful, it's like. Yeah, I can definitely see it. I can definitely see it. Unless, like. I know I'm doing it. But it's like, I don't know. To hear it from somebody. And sometimes when you're in the process that you don't understand the the impact you're having.
Meloney Hendricks (00:21:50) - And even when people come up to me and they share their stories and say, hey, Meloney, I appreciate this blog post, appreciate what you're doing, I'm still there. Like, okay, what did I do again? Remind me so sometimes, oh, my friend said this amazing thing to me over the weekend. She said, we are so powerful that even when. We are taking steps we make. We break ground. Well, the way in which that we do it, it's so graceful we don't even recognize. So. Even though I know that I'm making an impact. Me still looking at myself and, um, I don't know. Am I really making an impact? Am I really doing it? For me, I find that a little bit humbling in in a sense, because I don't want to get to a point where I feel like I'm so superior because I'm still like, I'm still learning. There's still things that could pick up from somebody else.
Kimberly Spencer (00:22:48) - But what makes the difference between someone who is making an impact and someone who perceives who's making an impact, but perceives himself as being superior.
Kimberly Spencer (00:23:01) - Huh?
Meloney Hendricks (00:23:07) - Um. That is a great question. Um. I don't know. II just for me, personality wise, I just never been one to show off in that way. That's that's just not me. Um. And I have this. Something like that. This mantra that I use to keep me grounded, where I say that I am inferior to no one, I'm superior to none, and I'm equal to all. Um, so. Even though I'm different, I'm still the same as you. Don't need to. To show off or prove that I am better than because we are still the same. We're still growing. No matter how much I grew, or no matter how much impact that I make in this world, I'm still just like you. It doesn't change who I am at the core and know.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:07) - That was that core value that's driving that.
Meloney Hendricks (00:24:11) - Um, the core value. Is. Like I said, I'm just like you. Regardless of what is that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:20) - A what is the intention or what what what is that an example of.
Meloney Hendricks (00:24:26) - That?
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:27) - I'm concerned going and.
Meloney Hendricks (00:24:29) - And going to mess up may not get everything right. I'm not perfect, I imperfectly perfect. That's basically it. So I think we we.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:41) - And what's the intention of seeing the world in that way.
Meloney Hendricks (00:24:48) - Knowing that no matter what, you can always start over and redefine yourself based on how you grew.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:55) - And what's the purpose of that?
Meloney Hendricks (00:24:58) - You don't limit yourself. There is no cap.
Kimberly Spencer (00:25:03) - And if there is no cap and you were to frame that in a positive, what would that be?
Meloney Hendricks (00:25:08) - There is room. I am limitless. I am limitless. What is it?
Kimberly Spencer (00:25:16) - What is the intention of being limitless?
Meloney Hendricks (00:25:20) - Hey, it's so weird to be godly today. There's one.
Kimberly Spencer (00:25:31) - And then seeing every like. And look at how you see everyone else then. If you're seeing and connecting with your higher source. You're inviting others and seeing that potential in others as well. We all have a like that ability to tap into that higher source, higher potential local. And as you lift up, I'm sure you've heard the phrase A rising tide lifts all boats.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:02) - So as you rise, you're you're elevating everyone else around you.
Meloney Hendricks (00:26:08) - Right. So that's where I'm coming from. It's not to say, okay, I'm here. I'm better than you. That's not where I'm coming from. I'm coming from London. I'm getting up there to bring you along with me, as I can get here to keep you down there.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:24) - There's a very big difference between. The pioneer who paves the path up the mountain for others to climb, and then hold the lantern at the top so others can climb it as well. And the person who puts themselves on a pedestal towering above everyone. Towers crumble. All. And they're easy to get knocked off of. But in shining your light, you are paving the path for others to climb that same mountain that you just did. And they don't have to do it in the darkness like you did. You're shining your light.
Meloney Hendricks (00:27:14) - That is. So freaking. But I hope you're listening. Listeners are taking notes like, know you guys see why we love Kimberly so much? Like.
Meloney Hendricks (00:27:24) - Like before we got on to this this there's this podcast episode I was telling her that I, my friend, connected with her and my friend was like, oh my God, Kimberly's so powerful. It's like, this is the reason, like the way how Kimberly speaks to you. Like, I love and appreciate you. You don't understand. While we may only have had, like what? Two conversations. But trust me, do you think, hey, you are so powerful. You know, if anyone hasn't told you that, let me tell you that I am so appreciative of you. Like I see you, I acknowledge you, I. I am so impressed by the work that you do. I am so impressed by how you can draw. Me out of myself. That that is truly a gift.
Kimberly Spencer (00:28:20) - Thank you.
Meloney Hendricks (00:28:21) - That is truly a gift. And it's like you're part of my community. And I love you all the way from the Caribbean. Thank you so much for the little nuggets that you would drop on me when we do get to speak.
Kimberly Spencer (00:28:35) - You are so welcome Meloney. It is my honor and it takes Queen to know a queen.
Meloney Hendricks (00:28:43) - Well.
Kimberly Spencer (00:28:45) - So. With this. I want to invite all the listeners and. And you that as you are. As you are courageously sharing your story. The way you share your story is. Even though you're up on the mountain. Hold a light. The people at the bottom. They don't know the journey. So your story of going from the darkness, pioneering your way up the mountain, that's where you guide people through so that by the time you're at the At on top of the mountain where you are guiding them with your light, they've been able to see because they recognize themselves in that space at the bottom of the mountain. They recognize themselves in that space, and they are knowing. They see the paths that others have said that they should pave, that are all nice and paved and tidy. And they're there, you know, there's no rough edges and there's no, you know, we're not going to talk about the darkness, and it's just all lovely and illuminated.
Kimberly Spencer (00:29:53) - But it's a shadow. There's heaps of shadows along that paved path. That society has said that they should be walking. And you have bravely forge a new way forward for them. That allows them to face those challenges and climb. So. Guide to that darkness so that they don't feel that alone. Oh. Thank you.
Meloney Hendricks (00:30:23) - I that's a that's a mic drop right there. That's a mighty drop right there. I don't think how can I follow something like that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:30:36) - Like so. I always love to ask. What did you love about this conversation?
Meloney Hendricks (00:30:43) - Oh, wow. I would say that that part right there when when you're on the mountain, you're you're you're shining your light for the others to come. And really, don't forget your story, Meloney. Don't forget to share the dark parts. It's okay to bring people along the journey. It's like I would say, it's kind of like if you were on a Netflix. If you tune into a Netflix series and you're at the end, I'm like, oh.
Meloney Hendricks (00:31:18) - Where? Where's the rest of it? Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:31:21) - Yeah, you see that? You see the happy ending. You see the the marriage, you see the, you know. Harry gets big and you miss all this stuff and the messy middle in between.
Meloney Hendricks (00:31:35) - Hey. Exactly. So it definitely gave me that. So that's how my brain is interpreting it. When we talk about seeing your life as a movie and setting the stage, like when your friend tilt tells you to see that two to watch this Netflix show it in and they're already like season nine and you're like, okay, I need to go back to season one, episode two. See, okay, so I could be on this journey with you. So wow. I will say that was my getting that new perspective of how I get to reach people or get to share in a more powerful way. That was that is my main takeaway. Was I am. I am so happy I tuned in for this. Like I know I'm here, but I'm also a listener as well.
Kimberly Spencer (00:32:21) - Amazing, yes. As always, my fellow sovereigns, let your voice be heard. Thank you so much for listening. If you love this episode, subscribe! Leave us a review and share it with your friends. For more tips on guest podcasting, storytelling and communication strategies. Follow us on social media at Communication Queens Agency and visit us at Communication Queens. I look forward to seeing you in the next episode. And in the meantime.
Kimberly Spencer (00:32:48) - Remember your story has the power to save one life. Let your story and your voice be heard.
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