How shame can influence long service and career growth in the workplace

Amidst the challenges and successes of building a career, one aspect that significantly impacted my tenure was the experience of shame in the workplace. Surprisingly, this seemingly negative feeling played a crucial role in shaping my decision to remain in the company till today. Through moments of vulnerability and reflection, I discovered the power of overcoming shame and evolving into a stronger, more resilient professional.

Join me as I delve into the intricacies of my journey and unravel the profound impact of shame in the realm of my professional life.

Around 2019, right about the time I was anticipating the renewal of my contract to a permanency, still struggling to navigate the banking world coming from an insurance background. I found myself overwhelmed by my daily tasks and meeting my daily and weekly execution stats.

And to alleviate some the pressure I one day decided to update my stats falsely, making them appear “acceptable” to the project team, with hopes of buying myself time and running these tests the following day.

But as we all know, lies are soon exposed!!

The plan was not successful as I had “passed” tests on a project another colleague was simultaneously testing but covering different scenarios and she had blockers, as the feature was not working, and if memory serves me well, it was then pulled and would no longer be going live.

The project manager recognized the inconsistency in my report vs my colleagues and came to both of us for clarity.

To cut a long story short, I HAD TO COME CLEAN!

Thank goodness for my manager and how he handled my confession. I left the sit down with him feeling comforted, however this was accompanied by bucket loads of feelings of shame and questioning my competence and worth within the organization. Little did I know that this would be the beginning of my super proficient career.

Through this season I had not realized that things were shifting for me and now almost 5 years later I’m grateful for that episode.

Here are some things I read up on about the power of experiencing shame in the workplace and highly agree with:

Fostering Loyalty through Shared Vulnerability - One significant aspect of shame in the workplace is its potential to create a shared sense of vulnerability among team members. When individuals openly acknowledge their mistakes and vulnerabilities, it fosters a culture of honesty, humility, and authenticity within the organization. This collective vulnerability cultivates empathy and understanding among colleagues, strengthening interpersonal relationships, and building a sense of camaraderie.

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Shame as a Catalyst for Development - While shame can evoke feelings of inadequacy; it also serves as a powerful catalyst for personal and professional growth. When employees experience shame in the workplace, it prompts self-reflection and a heightened awareness of their actions and decisions. This introspective process can drive individuals to acknowledge their shortcomings, seek opportunities for improvement, and strive for excellence in their work.

Building Trust and Resilience - In navigating moments of shame, employees have the opportunity to demonstrate resilience and accountability. Embracing and learning from mistakes not only showcases personal integrity but also builds trust with peers and superiors. When individuals take ownership of their errors and work towards rectifying them, it exemplifies a commitment to personal and professional growth.

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Enhancing Organizational Loyalty - The experience of shame, when channeled constructively, can deepen an individual's connection to the organization. Employees who confront and learn from moments of shame demonstrate a high level of investment in their work and the mission of the company. This dedication stems from a desire to contribute meaningfully, improve performance, and uphold the values of the organization.

Needless to say, I have since attempted not to even tell a “white lie” lol or pretend to understand something when I do not, knowing very well the cost of falsify anything in my line of work. False reporting is not only harmful to the project or product, in other industries could even be life threatening.

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I have since been immensely diligent in my work and have in the process been promoted twice and now lead a team and I make sure not to hide this story from any member in my team.

In conclusion, the intricate weaving of one’s professional life, emotions like shame, when viewed through a lens of growth and learning, can serve as catalysts for profound growth.

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Encouraging a culture of empathy and support, embracing vulnerability, confronting areas of improvement, are key elements in leveraging the power of shame to build resilience and loyalty within the organization for both the employer and employee.

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As employees navigate the complexities of the workplace, embracing moments of shame as opportunities for growth and connection can lead to a more fulfilling and enriching professional journey. By harnessing the transformative potential of vulnerability and learning from setbacks, individuals not only enhance their own development but also contribute to a culture of excellence and loyalty within the organization.