How to self-manage after retrenchment.

Ok let's talk about the R word - #Retrenchment.

As a Gen X, lifelong employment was something my generation was still aspiring to. Many of us define our self-identities with work. It's one of the first questions that get asked at Chinese New Year or Christmas gatherings with the extended family or with acquaintances.

As a formerly retrenched professional, I feel you and hear you. I am sharing my own self-management journey after retrenchment in the hope that it can help others who are either recently retrenched, or facing imminent retrenchment.

The first days of the news, this was what I felt:

1?? "I am not good enough" "why is so and so not retrenched, but me"

? To feel self-doubt at the point of retrenchment is entirely normal. Feel it, but do not dwell on it. Why? because retrenchment happens due to a myriad of reasons and sometimes the lack of transparency can cause you to feel you are the problem.

?The very first thing I learnt was not to view retrenchment as a final report card on me as a professional or as a person and my self-identity. This was hard! But eventually I got there. I might be retrenched but I am still a sales/marketing/finance/operations professional that successfully did this, or accomplished that. Retrenchment takes NONE of those accomplishments away.

2?? "How am I supposed to face my family?"

? We live in Asia, so our occupations are often tied to our identities and roles in our families as well, as breadwinners, providers, parents, etc. You feel like you let your parents or family down. You feel useless, and frustrated. Again these are completely normal emotions to feel. And believe me, the WORST thing you can do is to keep these to yourself and not talk about it to your family.

This is a tricky one, and you need to gauge how your own family members may take it. I informed my grown up siblings first, talked with them, before informing my parents and others.

Some of my friends chose not to say anything until a new job has been found. Depending on your seniority, that could take longer than what you think.

? As I thought through it, my thinking crystallised to this: Yes I got retrenched, but I am still someone's brother, someone's son, someone's uncle, someone's friend, just like yesterday. NOTHING has changed in those dimensions.

At times like this, it is less important to hang on to our pride as breadwinners, providers, and more important to ask family for emotional understanding and support. You WILL be on an emotional rollercoaster for the next days, weeks and months, and it's so much better to do it with family support. But please exercise judgement in communication as you know your families best.

3?? "What am I supposed to do tomorrow??" "Where do I even start?"

? Because for many of us our sense of self-worth is tied to our occupations, when that is suddenly taken away from us, we may feel a devastating sense of loss and emptiness. No more lunch breaks with colleagues, No more meetings where you get to set directions, chart action plans, clinch the deal, celebrate success. All we have is an empty calendar and a silent phone.

I felt ALL of that. It hurt, A LOT. ?? Especially when all your friends are still having work and cannot spend time with you. They don't always understand what you are dealing with mentally. The well meaning ones check in on you from time to time, but maybe some will say words to us that are thoughtless or insensitive.

? I think what worked for me here was to give myself a new 'job'. My job was to:

(a) Decide if I want to immediately find a new job or do something else (taking a career break, back to school, start entrepreneurship etc). Don't figure this one out yourself, but seek advise and talk with people who made those choices and see if you can see yourself doing that.

(b) If I want a job (and I did), make a routine. ?? I tried pushing the "Easy Apply" button a hundred times a day. ???? That's the wrong approach even though it's 'easy'. As a sales professional I thought I would approach finding a job just like getting sales leads. Make a list of potential people that I'd like to reach out to to reconnect. Ask to catch up, sincerely find out what they are working on, see how you can apply your skills to help them.

And be ready for the rejections, the "sorry nothing at the moment"s. Don't see them as closed doors but as seeds ?? you have now started to plant as they are now having an awareness and can keep a lookout for you. This might take weeks or months, so just like in sales, casting a selective but wide net is important.

Importantly, switch off the laptop at the end of the day, just like you would in your old job. Spend time on self-care, exercise, read, socialise.

?Tip here for professionals who are more senior: Your next employer is already someone you know, in your network or your extended network. Reach out with intention, and authenticity, and this is NOT the time to be shy about your accomplishments but connect these to how they can help your connection solve a problem they face. Make a few elevator pitches for different roles and practice them (just like a sales pitch).

Final tip that helped me alot - a light bulb moment when I realised it: ??

The bigger challenge after retrenchment wasn't applying or searching for jobs. It was battling my own thoughts and emotions. Once I understood that, I needed to spend time to manage the negative self talk in order for me to be successful.

Incidentally I found out that the word "Retrenchment" also means doubling down on your defenses in a military context.

So let's use retrenchment to make ourselves stronger and more resilient.

Hope the above was helpful and please share it with friends or connections who may need this advice in such trying times.

As always, DM if there are any questions or if you think I can help, would be happy to!

#retrenchment

#layoffs

#resilience

#genZ

#careerdevelopment

#careerbreak

#mindset

#jobsearch