How to Really Help your Teen Let Go of Negative Thinking

The ABC Technique

• A = Adversity – The problem
• B = Beliefs – The person’s beliefs about their problem
• C = Consequences – What will happen because of the problem

Parents tend to focus on A: “What’s wrong?” “What happened?” and C: “What are you going to do about it?” “How can I help you solve the problem?”

You need to help your teen listen to their inner dialogue. Their negative self talk can be:

• Everything bad always happens to me!
• The teacher hates me!
• I can’t do anything right, I’m so stupid.
• Nothing I try ever works.
• No one likes me.

When most parents hear these types of statements from their kids, they immediately try to fix it by contradicting them:

• Of course the teacher likes you, honey!
• No, no, you’re not stupid!
• Everyone loves you!
• You have so many friends!

This is very invalidating for your teen. They start believing that they can’t trust their own thoughts and emotions.?

You need to listen and validate their feelings. This way the thoughts can be removed in a more organic way. It has to come from them with real examples.

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