How to (Really) Help Women Advance at Work?

This post discusses some commonly known workplace experiences that are not vocalized. Continue reading to learn about how some (male) behaviors move the (tech) working culture backward one step at a time, making it harder for women to come forward, and how we can break the vicious cycle.

I was once introduced to someone who claimed to have founded the FinTech company I worked for years ago (although that person started three years after me). Later that year, I met someone else who also claimed to have founded that same company. I do not want to point fingers, but both were a “he.”

And no, I am not here to claim that I found that company. I most definitely did not. I am also not saying that we should generalize this example and shame our male colleagues.?Honestly, I have received more support from my male colleagues than my female colleagues during my career. So, it wouldn’t be fair.?Regardless, we all know that most career inflation and overestimation come from our male colleagues.

Why does overestimation matter, you might ask. You could claim that it is a harmless interpretation or that everybody lies on their CVs. However, I would disagree as overestimating your contribution can impact how others see their part.

There is a very obvious glass ceiling that we need to break. Everyone claims to be a diversity advocate on social media, but in reality, small toxic behaviors such as taking all the credit are taking the process backward. These small lies we crumble every now and then make our female colleagues undervalued or like they are enough. Proof??According to a KPMG study (2021), 75% of female executives across industries have experienced imposter syndrome in their careers. In addition, the study reveals that 74% of executive women believe that their male counterparts do not experience feelings of self-doubt as much as female leaders do.

(If the imposter syndrome concept is new to you, you can find many resources online about what the?imposter syndrome ?is and?why it hits women and women of color harder .)

Why is that? Because we are not born with the idea of being the center of attention. Women are taught to stay back. Those who do, have to overcome many challenges, including convincing themselves and others that they are ready. And when we finally make it there, and someone takes the credit or takes more than necessary, we withdraw again, doubting ourselves.??

I also feel compelled to add a personal challenge to make the situation more real. Although I have been somewhat blogging since 2016, I can’t find many female colleagues to feature. The many qualified women candidates we approach either do not answer or keep us hanging during the process. Some tell me, “Not now, maybe once I accomplish something.” Except for a few examples, convincing the few I interviewed took a long time. Today, I heard a similar experience from Andreea Radulescu of Women in Finance Podcast , who said that the accomplished women she reached out to turn her down because they feel like “they don’t have enough to share.” This attitude is, unfortunately, common among women.

Again, this post is not to bash male peers or talk about the issues we already know. It instead intends to deliver a message about readiness and support to both sides:

• ??Message to Male Peers: If you care about diversity, please stay real, avoiding making your peers feel “less.” You don’t have to take all the credit. Be humble, and people will know how good you are. When you overinflate your skills, your colleagues can differentiate what is real and think that you don’t know what you are talking about. True story! Hand the microphone to your female peers or the woman around you from time to time and make your colleagues feel appreciated. Flipping the coin, not all men are like this, as I know many men championing their female colleagues, and this post is an excellent opportunity to thank them all.
• ?? Message to Female Peers: You do not have to get another year of experience, degree, or title to be “worth it.” If you have enough knowledge to do the job, you can talk about it, too! When an opportunity comes your way, take it, and drag your friends with you. If it doesn’t seem to come your way, go and take it. If they do not give it to you, fight for it. Do not mind if people call you names if you get what you want at the end of the day. If you don’t want to do it for yourself, do it for others, who need role models and visibility. And if you already made it - give a hand and share the joy ;)

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If you feel like this post addresses you, share it with others that could also benefit. Also, feel free to tag or privately recommend your colleagues to Andreea or me for a Fintech podcast or interview feature. Thank you!