How to re-calibrate?

As I interview corporate executive women to speak at our next and largest #WomenChangemakers event Apr 17 and 18 in Singapore, I ask C-suite women about their pivotal moments in their lives. And we have invited more than 100 corporate women to speak at past 11 WomenChangemakers in 3 cities over 18 months.

From the stories shared with me, it dawned upon me that women probably find themselves re-calibrating more so in life than men.

Why is that so?

1. Transitions

Women are subject to more transitions than men, mostly. From being the daughter and sibling to working out the path to take towards being a spouse, motherhood and pursuing her own passion and/or profession. This coupled with aging, and coming back a full circle in care for their own parents and maybe in-laws.

Many successful female corporate executives have also moved across continents or leave their cities of origin, sometimes in support of the spouse and nowadays sometimes taking the lead over her spouse or based on a joint decision.

These transitions puts pressure that women often find themselves rising above and it could all sometimes happen all at once, pulling in opposite directions.

2. Juggling

Transitions and phases of life do not always have a clear start or end. It's wave after wave of juggling. Aside of putting family first, others first, there is no easy formula to cookie cutter.

Predictability and being in control is far from reality. But....successful women figure it out. It's constant figuring out, reset, test and learn, move on and re-calibrate. Learn from others, pick up new skills, new knowledge and hopefully find some support within the family or without.

3. Intuition

Some would say "I've got no choice but...". When push comes to shove, women rely on their intuition to make the best decision that makes sense to them.

Finding and living with the #RESONANCE of purpose is what many women are intuitively drawn to. It does come with a cost and trade-offs are inevitable. However we have also heard many stories at WomenChangemakers of unpredictable turn of events which turned out to be blessings in disguise. The learnings that came from that kind of disruption adds more strength to these women.

So how does one go about it - recalibrate?

1. Be intentional about it

It's like a soul-search or even a cleansing. Make it a point to check in on yourself. Face your fears. Face your conflicts. I personally draw most adrenaline from discomfort, from angst, from asking myself "What's not working?" and "How can I make it work?"

Allow you to find yourself.

2. Be honest with yourself

Being honest with yourself means also you are also being honest to your family and friends. Our loved ones often dances around our choices and stress has ripple repercussions. This requires heightened self-awareness. Know what you need, what makes you happy, where to draw strength. Start with you. And you will attract the relevant resources to you.

3. Find your NORTH STAR

Knowing your north star early on gets you centred. The common advice on the plane about taking care of yourself before being helpful to others resonates here. There may be times where you may need to adjust your vision. But many times, you are just taking a different course to get there. Simply changing the way you look at something immediately opens up new possibilities.

4. Ask the right questions

Ask yourself the right questions, not questions of self-doubt. Ask empowering questions even when you don't have the answers or where to begin. Ask questions to learn more about yourself, your environment and others in relation to you.

Simple questions like these are already a good start:

a. Why am I doing what I am doing?

b. What is most meaningful to me now?

c. If there is one thing I would like to change, what would that be?

d. How can my strengths add value to my purpose?

e. What is my purpose? How would I prioritise?

5. Surround yourself with supportive circle

Find your tribe - one of empathy. Listen to their questions and feedback. But make sure not to be overwhelmed and exercise good judgment. Join communities that will help you positively grow. WomenChangemakers is one such community - whether you are new in town. local, expat or you wish to explore more diversity or find role models. It is the most authentic event in town bar none.

6. Know what you don't know

It is easy to limit yourself or to remain complacent. Time is indeed a luxury for most women who wear many hats. I practise "reframing" a lot. Simply by using a dfferent word or looking through a different lens, you immediately change your attitude and potentially your strategy. Put yourself out there more if you want to know you don't know. Evolve with age and life's experiences and evolve with the times.

7. Get clarity and go beyond

Recalibration is a process. For some there is more mess to sort through (depending on how frequently you exercise recalibration) and for others it is simply taking a decision weighing various options. Whatever it is, find clarity, take a decision and do not be afraid to take a step forward even if it will be greeted with a lot of uncertainty.

RECALIBRATION is like an exercise of mindset. Play with it, share your thinking process, get inputs, make a judgment call if it RESONATES. When it does, stick with it long enough to see your development through till you next need to recalibrate again.

The theme of our next WomenChangemakers is RESONANCE. View our past events and testimonials on our youtube channel.