How to Practice and Achieve Emotional Sobriety— “Emotional Intelligence”

Sobriety is often associated with physical sobriety, or the process by which an individual stops using certain addictive substances. But emotional sobriety is just as important and often overlooked. Developing emotional sobriety is crucial if you want to get back to normal life and start a new journey after you manage to achieve physical sobriety. The ability to handle your emotions is a sign of emotional sobriety, because many addicts develop addictions because since are unable to handle their emotions.

In?this blog, we will discuss the concept of emotional sobriety, and explain the connection between addiction and emotions. In the end, we will give you some advice on practicing emotional sobriety.

Ideas in Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman?will give you more solutions.

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Contents

·?What Is Emotional Sobriety?

·?Physical Sobriety Vs. Emotional Sobriety

·?Connection Between Addiction and Emotions

·?8 Signs of Emotional Sobriety

·?How to Practice and Achieve Emotional Sobriety?

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·?What Is Emotional Sobriety?

After completing an addiction rehab program, many people feel confused and unsure as to why they don't feel happy or free after stopping drugs. After all, your body starts to balance itself out again when you stop using drugs.

Despite this, addiction is much more than a physical problem. Emotions play a significant role in substance abuse disorders. Many people use substances to cope with distressing emotions. Without those substances as a crutch, emotions may seem more difficult to deal with.

After you get sober, you might also feel like you're on an emotional roller coaster. Some people behave in a similar way to the way drugs do. For example, you might get into impulsive relationships to seek out a different type of high. When you manage your emotions with unhealthy coping mechanisms, you're not emotionally sober. This can create a completely different type of addiction.

·?Physical Sobriety Vs. Emotional Sobriety

Living an alcohol-free life involves these two traits. However, they are entirely different.

??Physical sobriety

The practice of not drinking or using alcohol is essential, but not sufficient for full recovery from addiction. Achieving physical sobriety requires strength and self-control which is difficult to achieve.

??Emotional sobriety

In addition to protecting against relapse, emotional sobriety strengthens self-esteem and enables one to handle life more wisely and graciously. It requires self-control, greater resiliency, and balance in life, which in turn lead to the loss of a drinking pattern.

·?Connection Between Addiction and Emotions

Depression and anger can both negatively and positively affect a person's choices and behaviors. They affect how people feel and act in different situations.

Addiction grows based on emotions. People who feel happy make healthier choices. However, when they feel negative emotions such as guilt, anxiety, or anger, they are more likely to become addicted.?

Addiction has a devastating effect on everyone involved in a person's life. It affects everyone, including the loved one in the addict's life who is also experiencing emotional instability. Addiction creates a variety of emotional complications for everyone in the family.

·?8 Signs of Emotional Sobriety

It is not possible to switch to emotional sobriety as it differs from physical sobriety. This type of sobriety is acquired by dealing with life in a more effective manner over a long period of time. This important ability can develop slowly, so you may not be aware that it is occurring, so here are eight signs that might help you recognize that it is developing correctly:

1.?You live in the moment.

You probably need to work more on developing emotional sobriety if you are constantly worrying about the future or feeling regret for the past. If you have developed this ability, you can live in the present moment without racing into the past or the future. You can develop this ability by engaging in practices such as mindfulness meditation.

2.?You take life as it comes.

When you no longer feel compelled to run from your emotions, then you are developing emotional sobriety. The trick is not to eradicate problems in life, but to learn how to deal with them. Life is always going to be challenging, but if you can deal with it on life's terms, you are well on your way to emotional sobriety.

3.?You care more about others.

Now that you're better able to deal with your own emotions, you can devote more time to others. It is possible to feel joy about the triumphs of other people just as much as you are about your own success, and this can become a wonderful source of joy. It has been said that real happiness can only be found through deep connections with others.

4.?You no longer seek mind-altering substances.

Your comfort in your own skin means you no longer seek mind-altering substances, and you begin to realize that almost everything you need for happiness is available right now.

5.?You begin to appreciate blessings in your life.

The good thing about emotional sobriety is that you don't have to keep striving to improve your emotional state by accumulating new items. You are now able to appreciate all of the good things in your life from this new perspective, since you can see that you already have a lot of good in your life.

6.?You live more positively.

Having an emotionally sober life does not mean you have a free pass in life, but it does mean you value life as an incredible privilege. You develop the sense that things will always work out in the end, which means you are generally positive and upbeat about things; this makes you an attractive person to be around.

7.?Emotions rarely overwhelm you.

Now that you can control your emotions so much, it means you don't get angry or experience other strong emotions. It's almost as if there's an inner sense of tranquillity no matter what's going on. You have the ability to deal with problems calmly and effectively if they arise.

8.?You can easily regulate your behavior.

Even though you continue to have some bad habits, your level of emotional sobriety makes it easier for you to change your behavior. You understand that the goal is progress not perfection, but you keep chipping away at any bad habits you have in order to better your life.

·?How to Practice and Achieve Emotional Sobriety?

Amy Fry, LISW, addiction and substance abuse counselor, and psychiatrist Akhil Anand, MD, helped us understand emotional sobriety and its process.

The process of achieving emotional sobriety can be very challenging because it involves such a complex set of steps. “It goes beyond simply removing substances,” explains Fry.

??Be physically sober

Physical sobriety is a prerequisite for emotional sobriety, say Dr. Anand and Fry. “A person needs to be physically sober and refuse to drink to work on themselves.”

It's impossible for me to nurture and take care of my own feelings if I am numbing them with alcohol." says Fry. "If I am numbing those emotions, I cannot recognize them and cannot nurture those feelings."

In her opinion, eliminating a substance from your life doesn't automatically guarantee success. "Just because you eliminated that substance from your life doesn't mean life is going to become wonderful overnight. Other work needs to be done internally before that can happen."

??Recognize and accept emotions

A big part of sobriety is learning how to recognize your emotions. "If I am angry or anxious, what is the best way to deal with this? How do I behave in a healthy way? Identifying those feelings and asking those questions are essential to sobriety."

Those in recovery may feel compelled to lash out if they become angry. But Fry says they should learn to slow down and reflect on how to respond better when faced with this challenge. You think about how you can respond in a healthier way for everyone involved if you slow things down.

As she continues, "Managing those feelings and responding to them might require mindfulness or meditation. Perhaps breathing techniques can help you slow down and calm down so you can respond to them rather than reacting." Likewise, Dr. Anand points out that mindfulness focuses on living in the present and accepting whatever happens.

It can be very difficult for some people to learn to manage their emotions. “They may think they know everything, but upon digging deeper, they realize that their emotional development ended somewhere,” says Dr. Anand. There can be a lot of emotional skeletons that come out during this time. However, it’s also therapeutic and can also help bring about the 'psychic change' mentioned in 12-step programs.

??Join therapy or a support group

In order to maintain emotional sobriety, Dr. Anand argues that therapy plays a very important role. “Whether it's individual therapy or group therapy, that support in recovery is very important.”

There are many people who can offer support and advice, he says, and it doesn't always have to be a professional. "It can be a sponsor or anyone who has experienced similar addiction challenges."

According to Fry, people trying to obtain emotional sobriety shouldn't rely on particular family members. It's all about ensuring you have people around you who can give you the support you need.

"Sometimes, well-meaning family members don't necessarily do or say the right thing. There may be a problem with their response," she says. Being around certain people with whom you have a complicated relationship could pose a risk to someone struggling with triggers.

In addition, Fry emphasizes the importance of seeking support from those who are familiar with your situation. There are people in your support program who can help you to achieve emotional sobriety, whether it's AA, a therapist, or another individual in the program."