How to Persuade and Influence?

Persuading and Influencing

A few people have it, but a handful of us our gifted naturals (and I’m still learning!)

What’s impressive is not just how easily they use their charisma and eloquence to convince others, it’s how eager others are, to do what is requested of them - their way with people is an art, and artists as a rule, are far better at doing, than at explaining.

“Playing the I am boss card is out”. In modern day cross-functional environments, persuasion skills exert far greater influence over others’ behavior than formal power structures do.

This brings us to the important point that persuasion skills may now be more necessary than ever. Scientific research shows that persuasion, truly effective persuasion, works by appealing to a limited set of deeply rooted human drives and needs.

Here are 6 design principles we can use to influence people in our own organisations.

Principle 1: Liking

People like those who like them.

Controlled research has found several factors reliably increase liking, but two stand out as most effective – similarity and praise.

Similarity draws people together, people who share the same political beliefs and social values stand together. The same goes for those of a similar age, religion, and other habits.

We can use informal conversations each workday to identify common areas of enjoyment, hobbies, or favorite films and TV shows.

Creating these bonds engender goodwill and trustworthiness in every subsequent encounter, making it easier to build rapport later.

Praise is another way of charming and disarming. Praise doesn’t always have to be merited – just positive remarks about a person’s traits, attitude and performance generates a liking in return (and later on more willing compliance with the wishes of the person offering the praise).

Principle 2: Reciprocity

People repay in kind.

It is a universal human tendency to treat people the way they treat them. If you have caught yourself smiling at a coworker because he or she smiled first, you’ll know how this principle works.

People can elicit desired behavior from others by displaying it first – a sense of trust, a spirit of co-operation, or pleasant demeanor – in other words they model the behavior they wish to see from others.

Principle 3: Social Proof

People follow the lead of similar others.

We know this intuitively, but the intuition has been confirmed by experiments - that we rely heavily on people around us for cues on how to behave and think.

For example, if you’re trying to streamline your department’s work processes, rather than try to convince employees of the move’s merits, ask an old-timer who supports the initiative to speak up for it at a team meeting.

Your compatriot’s testimony will stand a much better chance of convincing your employee group than another speech from your boss! So here, influence is best exerted horizontally than vertically.

Principle 4: Consistency

People align with clear commitments.

People need not only like you, but need to feel committed to what you want them to do. This also means winning public commitment from them.

There is strong empirical evidence to suggest that a choice made actively – one that is spoken out loud or written down, or otherwise made explicit – is considerably more likely to direct someone’s future conduct than the same choice left unspoken.

Let’s suppose you want employees to submit a report in a timely fashion. Ask him to summarize the decision in a memo and send it to you. Doing so, you will greatly increase the odds that he or she will fulfill the commitment. Why? Because people as a rule, live up to what they have written down.

And written statements become even more powerful when they’re written down, publicly made, and visibly posted.

And here’s an important revelation. More than 300 years ago, Samuel Butler wrote a couplet that explained that commitments must be voluntary to be lasting and effective.

“He that complies against his will is of his own opinion still!”

If an undertaking is forced, imposed, or coerced, it’s not a commitment, it’s an unwelcome burden.

A better approach is to identify something that the employee genuinely values in the workplace. Spend time identifying this. Whether its high quality work (workmanship), or team spirit – you could then describe how timely reports are consistent with these values.

This gives the employee reasons to improve that he can own. And because he owns them, they’ll continue to guide his behavior, even when you’re not watching.

Principle 5: Authority

People defer to experts!

Some questions, be they legal, financial, medical or technological, need so much specialized knowledge to answer, we have no choice but to rely on experts.

As there is good reason to defer to experts, people should take great pains to ensure they establish their own expertise before they attempt to exert their influence.

People sometimes mistakenly assume that others will recognize and appreciate their experience. Not always so! Besides from nailing your diplomas to the office wall, interacting socially before getting down to business will make future discussions easier, and blunt disagreements.

This may be telling an anecdote of how you have successfully solved a similar problem before (to the one on the agenda, for the next meeting).

So establish expertise early, so that when discussions turn to business, what you have to say will be accorded the respect it deserves!

Principle 6: Scarcity

(The last principle!)

People want more of what they can have less of.

Several studies have shown that items and opportunities are seen to be more valuable the less they become available.

Informing a co-worker of a closing window of opportunity, the chance to get the boss’ ear before she leaves, can mobilize action dramatically.

Try loss framing your messages – tell people what they stand to lose than what they stand to gain. Do this ethically though, as deliberately deceiving others is highly ethically objectionable, foolhardy and will never work out in the long term.

Conclusion

In conclusion, although the six principles have their application and can be discussed separately for the sake of clarity, they should be applied in combination to compound their impact.

For example, while talking about your own skills and expertise, and problem agendas, learn about your colleagues likes and dislikes – try and locate genuine similarities, and give sincere compliments.

Let your expertise surface and establish rapport. Encourage other people to sign on as well.