How to Own Your Success By BEing Authentically You: Own Your Power

In the first installment for How to Own Your Success By BEing Authentically You, I shared there are three parts to it: Own Your Story/Own Your Power/Own Your Presence. Last week’s installment introduced Own Your Story. Today, we are continuing this path with Own Your Power.

"Power gives life and energy, while force takes these things away." ~Dr. David R. Hawkins

Just so we’re clear, let me explain what I mean by power. There is a great book by Dr. David R. Hawkins called Power vs. Force. I love his definition of power: he describes it as what energizes, gives forth, supplies, and supports. Power gives life and energy, while force takes these things away.

Owning our power means to stand in it…tall…grounded in our essence and knowing we have something of value to bring to this world. I remember a story about…

Two construction workers that were taking their lunch break one day at the top of the scaffolding.

One opened up their lunch bag and says, “Man, peanut butter and jelly again. 25 years and it’s the same lunch every day, peanut butter and jelly. You’d think one day I could have something different. Ham and cheese would be nice.”

They ranted and ranted about their lunch. Their buddy, having heard this over and over again said, “Well, why don’t you tell your partner that you’d like something different? Tell them you’d like something different tomorrow.”

To which they replied, “My partner, are you kidding me? They don’t pack my lunch, I do!”

So, they’re packing peanut butter and jelly every day and dissatisfied with it. They keep opening up the lunchbox expecting to find roast beef, or turkey, or ham, or something different. Sound familiar…don’t we all do that sometime?

I remember a dear friend shared his epiphany with me after being really frustrated with his “ground hog day” life: “nothing changes until something changes”. The story begs us to not just be conscious of our choices but recognize that we have them…in our power!

 Very often trying to OWN OUR POWER…looks like this. Rickety bridge…not sure of our next steps…can only see a foot or so in front of us. How many of you have been on this bridge? I know I have…it was just last week!

• When you’re in this place, what are some of the things you are saying it yourself? (Are you crazy? That’s never been done before! You better turn back! Who do you think you are?)
• What are you noticing physically? Is there uncertainty?  Fearfulness? Anxiousness?

I think it’s a good time to explore the “F” word…no, not that one! I’m talking about the other F-word FEAR! We even have acronyms to the common meaning of FEAR like:

Forget Everything and Run

Our minds think it’s real…. even though it may have no real substance. It usually comes about we feel undermined or threatened…it makes us hang on even more to the known and what we’re used to…in other words, stay in our comfort zone.

That’s because some of those old stories start to come up, don’t they? Creating anxiousness, worry, and apprehension. FEAR takes a lot of emotional labor. And we even make up more stories to rationalize what we’re thinking. (Come on...I know I’m not the only one!) …for me, I go down the rabbit hole (Alice in Wonderland) until I learned to control it.

• Where are we not stepping into our greatness because of FEAR? 
• What are the things we are still holding on to because of FEAR?

FEAR hijacks our logic and taps into our natural response of Fight, Flight, or Freeze. Unless we have a plan for, not IF it happens, but when it happens. 

Now, don’t get me wrong…fear is there for a reason. Earlier in human history, it was to save us from the saber tooth tiger. Of course, now, we don’t contend with those tigers, but we still need fear to some degree to keep us safe. Let me offer another way to look at F.E.A.R.:

Use the opposite acronym: FACE EVERYTHING AND RISE!

Liz Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love) shares, “we let fear drive our lives versus it just being a passenger”.

For me…fear and her cousin the gremlin, will jump in saying things like: “that hasn’t been done before” …” what if nobody comes” …” you’re actually going to put your book out there” … you get the idea. I often make my ‘fear’ sit in the back seat…with duct tape over its mouth. Don’t laugh…my intention is to make a profound impact in the world and to live my highest self…I don’t need that in my head.

Here’s the thing…what you choose to do with your FEAR now, can shape your future based on if you decide to respond or react. If we look to respond to FEAR as an opportunity… as a defining moment…we enable our brains to look at it differently.

I invite you to FACE EVERYTHING AND RISE so you can OWN YOUR POWER!

But, first, we have to get out of our comfort zones. Often we do not own our power because we are ‘comfortable. The Comfort zone has been described as a place or situation where one feels safe or at ease and without stress. Sounds idyllic, doesn’t it? Don’t be fooled. If you plan on having a breakthrough…to make a difference…to live your greatness…requires courage. 

And as Brene Brown shares: “You can courage or you can choose comfort…you cannot have both.”

Behind the unknown, for most of us, is fear. We so often hide within our comfort zone because of it. I love this picture because it describes the Comfort Zone as where 98% of the population lives. However, the other 2% lives…dare I say, thrives, outside of the comfort zone…I always found that it’s where the magic happens!

I recently ran across an excerpt from @Karen Salmansohn’s book: How to Be Happy Dammit:

"There once was this criminal who had committed a crime. (Because, hey, that’s what criminals do. That’s their job!) Anyway, he was sent to the king for his punishment. The king told him he had a choice of two punishments. He could be hung by a rope or take what’s behind the big, dark, scary, iron door. The criminal quickly decided on the rope.

As the noose was being slipped on him, he turned to the king and asked. “By the way, out of curiosity, what’s behind that door?” The king laughed and said: “You know, it’s funny, I offer everyone the same choice, and nearly everyone picks the rope.” “So,” said the criminal, “Tell me. What’s behind the door? I mean, obviously, I won’t tell anyone,” he said, pointing to the noose around his neck.

The king paused then answered, “Freedom, but it seems most people are so afraid of the unknown that they immediately take the rope."

We have this false sense of security that we think our comfort zone gives us. Experience has taught me in some situations it proved a detriment to stay in my comfort zone. The area where I have stretched have taken me around the world, met the most amazing people, pushed me beyond my perceived capabilities.

You may ask…but how?

In his ground-breaking book, Bring Your Worth, @Damon Brown shares: “You have to bring your worth to the table to get your worth from your partnerships and then serve your worth to the world.”

• First is to Trust yourself. “A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on its own wings.”
• Secondly…know your worth. I recall a story about Picasso. He was having lunch one afternoon and someone recognized him and asked if he would draw her a picture on a napkin. He found a napkin, whipped up a picture, handed to the women and shared, ‘that will be $10,000’. The woman gasped and said ‘but, it only took you ten minutes to draw that. In response, Picasso shared… ‘no, my dear lady, it took me 50 years.’
• Thirdly: Give yourself PERMISSION to FACE EVERYTHING AND RISE AND journey from your comfort zone and into your GENIUS ZONE!

Our next step is to OWN YOUR PRESENCE and will be in the next installment!

If this resonates with you and you want more insights, I invite you to PRE-ORDER my next book, Waves of Leadership: Inspiration for the Those Leading from the Middle and be automatically entered to be one of three winners of a premium midnight blue Own Your Success Tumbler!

Where are you not stepping into your greatness because of FEAR? Share it below in the comments. 

And, if you think this message will resonate and move a colleague or a loved one, share it! Remember, “Inspired Action Motivates.”