How To Navigate Difficult Conversations

How Confident Do You Feel About Managing Difficult Workplace Conversations?

Whether you are a new manager or experienced leader, odds are that this is one of your least preferred workplace dialogues.

Bottom line - you do not need to approach this topic reluctantly.

Here are five tangible ways to make these conversations worth having and use them to build productive and meaningful working relationships.

??Before You Start

1. Frame It Up

You may have heard that ‘words create worlds.’ How you think and frame this conversation sets the scene for how you – and your partner – feel about it.

Rather than think of this as a difficult or challenging conversation, which frames it negatively, consider it an important or key conversation instead.

Choose an appropriate time and location.

Prepare for the conversation and plan your approach. Aim to be supportive and objective. Think about your tone of voice and seek to sound curious and exploratory, rather than judgemental. Provide feedback sensitively - as you would prefer if you were on the receiving end.

??As You Begin

2. Set The Scene

Establish the reason for the conversation. Make it crisp and brief - a top line summary.

For example: It is important we have this conversation because I’ve noticed (or it has come to my attention that …)

Link the context to why it matters. Be clear.

For example: This means that (your team will find it hard to meet this OKR, or we won’t be able to meet x client target or any other reason).

3. Outline Evidence, Impact – and What You Need Now

Here is where you include more detail. Offer a clear, succinct description of the facts that have led to this conversation, and who and how it impacts others, the team or the business. Comment on the behaviour, not the person.

Now specify the actions and/or behaviours you would like to see instead. Be very clear about what this looks like.

??Now Listen

4. Right Of Reply

Ask - How do you see it?

Your job here is to listen without interrupting before you respond. If the person accepts or seems receptive to the feedback, go on to the next point. If the person disagrees, remind them of the impact and affirm how the change you are discussing benefits the person, the team and the business.

If there is no constructive progress, you may need to stop here and resume the conversation at another time.

??Chart The Where To Now?

5. Reinforce and Agree Next Steps

Affirm the pluses of the changed behaviour or actions and how this will benefit you, others, the team or the business.

Jointly discuss and agree steps beyond the meeting, including what and when. Set a time when you will reconvene to discuss progress.

What has worked well for you when you have successfully navigated these conversations?