How to Motivate a Negative Thinker and Get Good Results

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(This post was written by Jerilyn Covert, editor at thePTDC.com.)

Negativity tends to lead in one direction, and it’s not toward the client’s goals.

"It can really snowball," says psychologist Lisa Lewis, EdD. "Once it gets going, your clients may start to believe their own negative thoughts as being true, even if they’re irrational or hyperbolic. So interfering with the snowball is a good skill set to have."

Negative thinking comes in many forms, Lewis says.

"All-or-nothing" thinkers beat themselves up if they don’t perfectly hit every goal. Those who "filter" weed out all the positive and focus only on the negative. "Catastrophizers" take a small thing and blow it up.

An example would be, "I had three cookies last night, so my whole program is ruined."

How do you respond? Like a scientist.

"It’s just data," Lewis says. "Observe what you’re hearing, and try to take something useful from it." Figure out where the negativity is coming from. Is your client frustrated? Tired? Lacking self-belief? Use the info to help tailor her program.

You may be able to offer solutions. Or, if that doesn’t seem to help, simply acknowledge the client’s feelings and shift the focus to something positive:

"I’m sorry you got off track this weekend, but you always crush your workouts. So let’s get after it, and I bet you’ll feel better when we’re done." 

Then do what you do best: Instruct. Physical work helps the client get out of her head and into the moment. "Thoughts are mental," Lewis explains. "If you’re focused on the process of training, it’s going to minimize or even remove negative thoughts from the here and now."

The takeaway: Don’t expect instant change. You see your client for, what, an hour a day? That negative inner voice has access 24/7. Accept that you may not be able to fight it. But for that hour you’re together, you can at least put that voice on mute.

Quote of the Day:

“Your clients don’t want to work with a robot who never misses a training session, counts her oatmeal flakes, and is in bed by 9 p.m. Your clients are human, and when you show them that you are human as well, they feel heard and understood. This will help you build relationships for years to come.” —Molly Galbraith

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Jonathan Goodman is the founder of the Personal Trainer Development Center, the largest independent community of fit pros in the world. He’s also the founder of the first-ever certification for online fitness trainers, the Online Trainer Academy. Originally from Toronto, Jon travels the world with his wife and young son in the winters.