How meeting your inner child will make you a more happy and functional adult

This installation from Burning Man festival 2015 remains one of my most favorite art pieces up until today.

Two adults in disagreement, sitting with their backs to each other. Yet, the inner child in both of them simply wants to connect.

It’s a beautiful reminder that our relationship to our inner child is one of the most important cornerstones of a healthy psyche. It also creates the foundation to an authentic lifestyle that honors who we truly are. In the workplace just as well as in our private life.

Have you met your inner child? Are you friends with him or her?

I remember starting inner child work back in 2016. At the beginning it was weird and also difficult. 

Connecting to your inner child requires that you go far inward. You settle down in a calm and undisturbed space, take a couple of deep breaths, close your eyes and visualize the “little you”. 

You can then connect and start a dialogue, and ask questions like “what are you feeling, what do you need right now?”. 

That’s when the revelations started for me. I realized I had never really asked myself these questions on a really profound level, addressing the innocent part of me and my primal needs, stripped away from all external layering and conditioning that the world had put on me.

Inner child work became an elementary and powerful part of my (self) work. 

By connecting with our inner child, we gain access to new information about our unhealed “wounds”, and the needs that may not have been met when we were actually children. 

Then, “reparenting” becomes the process of meeting those needs and practicing self-care so we can operate in the world as happy, functional adults.

Reparenting also means that we’re no longer expecting other people to fulfill our inner child needs. Because when we put these needs on other people, it’s neither fair to them nor us. And that’s where most dysfunctional interactions start, that can then turn into codependent and even toxic relationships.

A neglected inner child will lead to repeating and continued struggles and problems in our romantic relationships, family, friendships and the workplace, and how we deal with our boss and colleagues. 

It affects how we show up in the world and impact our environment. As you can imagine people like Donald Trump have not made peace with their inner child. 

Ultimately it also defines the most important relationship — the one we have with ourselves. 

When a healthy dialogue has formed between you and your inner child, you know how to:

? Connect to body sensations and emotions

? Identify and clearly communicate emotions

? Identify needs and make requests without entitlement, anger or overreaction

? Remain true to yourself even when stressed or in conflict

? Be self-honoring and able to set boundaries

? Give space to your inner child to have big feelings without shutting them down, yet ensuring that the inner child is not going to immediately “act out” on these feelings

? Practice self-love and self-care

I hope this can shed light on one of the essential secrets of self-healing and self-development. Maybe my post has also wet your palate to learn more and dig deeper. 

Today I’m thanking my inner child for its playfulness, its creativity and its longing for profound connection with others. 

What is your inner child up to today?