Emotions are part of the human condition. We deal with them in every interaction, every single day. From work to home to social events, our emotions shift depending on many factors. When & if you are in a position of leadership, you also have the added pressure to set the tone for others to follow. The secret to success is learning how to manage those emotions, whether you are an aspiring leader or the CEO.
Emotional outbursts at work could be due directly to work-related matters or to stressors from your personal life spilling into your work life. Handling your emotions (particularly negative ones) at work is often seen as a measure of professionalism.
Here are a few steps to help you manage your emotions:
- Organise Your Thoughts (negative emotions from home which affect your work): Try and leave personal matters and issues at home. When you commute to work, use that time to tell your mind to let go. Some find it helpful to mentally ‘store/lock up” the issue in a box for the time being. You can also compartmentalise work-related stressors so that your emotions at work don’t spill over into your personal life too.
- Know your triggers: It helps when you are able to recognise what upsets or angers you. This way, you can prepare yourself to remain calm and plan your reaction should the situation occur.
- The 10-second rule: This is especially helpful if you are feeling angry, frustrated or even irate. If you feel your temper rising, try and count to 10 to recompose yourself. If possible, excuse yourself from the situation to get some distance but do reassure the other party that you will come back to deal with the matter.
- Clarify: It is good to clarify before reacting, in the event that it could be a simple misunderstanding or miscommunication.
- Never reply or make a decision when angry: Never let your anger or unhappiness cloud your judgement. Hold off all communication while you are still angry. You can type it first but save it as a draft and sleep on it for a day. Re-read it the next day or even let someone you trust take a look at it before you send it.
- Apologise for any emotional outburst: Sometimes our emotions do get the better of us. If you do have an emotional outburst, apologise immediately to the person and perhaps to those around you who might have heard it.
- Never bring your negative emotions home: It is good practice to let go of any anger, frustration and unhappiness at the end of every workday. It’s best to empty the emotional “trash can” on a daily basis, to prevent the feeling of being overwhelmed. You can use the compartmentalisation method mentioned above, or you can plan to engage in enjoyable activities after work with your friends and family.
- Deep breathing & relaxation techniques: This will help with emotions like anxiety, worry, frustration and anger. You can take a walk to cool down, and listen to some relaxing music. Talk to someone who can help you calm down.
Leadership & Peak Performance Coach | Author | Speaker
