How to Manage In-Fighting and Tension Among Your Restaurant Staff

The following is adapted from Unsliced.

Your team is what makes your restaurant. You can have the greatest menu and the best business plan and still fail because of bad staff. Bad staff care less about the food, about customer experience, and can make customers never come back again.

You have to be unified as a team, but within a restaurant there are sections that can pit themselves against each other because of past differences, jealousy, and gossip, making everything go out of balance and causing problems for your business. 

As the leader of your staff, what do you do in these situations? Here are some typical examples of groups in a restaurant who commonly fight, and what you can do about them. Only after you recognize what’s going on and shut it down can you remain unified.

Front of House vs. Back of House

The front of house (FOH) and back of house (BOH) are the two big sections of your restaurant. Both are equally important. Great food from the back gets customers coming in, and excellent service from the front keeps customers. 

Try to make both groups understand why the other is important. For example, servers who help BOH get a dish ready to serve and give clear ticket instructions are appreciated. This behavior, along with being courteous to kitchen employees, keeps morale and motivation upbeat.

BOH staff must understand the mental agility it takes to anticipate the needs of several tables. The server’s job is not to get flustered at the customers, to always be patient. They must also appear charming and knowledgeable. Their job is to not only deliver food but also enhance the customer’s experience. If service is being done right, it will appear more natural than it looks.

Day Crew vs. Night Crew

For FOH, you have two completely separate customer groups. A quick service, lower-tipping group that works during the day (and those slow mid-morning and mid-afternoon times) versus the nighttime crew’s more extended tables with more significant demands.

All are hard jobs, and all deserve respect. The morning crew must set the night up for success since they have more time on their hands. The night crew must ensure a great experience and close strong to set up for a fresh start the next day.

The same rules apply to BOH. One is mostly prep and early hours; the other goes late into the night with crazy ticket lines and more cleaning tasks.

Communication, understanding, standard-setting, and empathy for the other shift are crucial to peacekeeping. Have a total refusal to let your restaurant get divided. Always explain what the other shift doesn’t see and kill any unrighteous complaining.

Employee vs. Manager

Sometimes managers have to play bad cop. Management can’t ever dislike an employee or hold a grudge, though. Their job is to keep great people, maintain standards, and motivate staff. Managers must sometimes appease all-star staff members, and that pill can be hard to swallow. Managers need to make wise, egoless decisions.

Some staff will just get upset when they don’t get their way; that’s fine as long as they still respect you. Never tolerate disrespect, and never give staff a reason not to respect you. If you ever do, fix it by admitting fault and correcting the issue.

It may sound weird, but a successful general manager is the one not doing anything, only observing the customers. They are in control of their role and have all systems functioning properly. They are there waiting in case something goes wrong. They’re ready for the drunk customer, air conditioning issue, an accident, and other issues that must be resolved.

Restaurant vs. the Customer

Customers pay our bills. Shut down any disagreements immediately. You may hear an employee say, “But the customer doesn’t get it!”

They’re not paid to get it. We are, so shut it down. 

For example, if the staff gets upset that a customer came in five minutes before you close, you should say sarcastically, “Can you believe that they came in while we were open? What were they thinking?!?” The mentality of pushing away business is death in a restaurant.

Shut that down, as well.

Our Restaurant vs. Every Other Restaurant

It’s our job to be the best. It’s not our job to say anything negative about others to prove we’re the best. We leave that to our customers.

Part of being great is not talking about it. Louis Vuitton ads don’t bash Target handbags. Rolls Royce doesn’t spout that their car is more beautiful than a Kia. Be classy and speak about what excites you. Don’t attack the competition. 

If a rival restaurant says they’re better than you, don’t even address the argument. Speak about how many great things you do day to day while their name never gets mentioned. You will only come off as petty if you argue with your competition.

Managing is a Balancing Act

Managing a team is like walking a tightrope. It can get dicey at times, but if you maintain proper balance and let everyone know their expectations, things will stay stable and drama-free.

Keep your crew happy, and you’ll be successful. BOH will be motivated to provide good food, and FOH will have smiles on their faces when the customers walk in the door.

That’s how you want your restaurant to work. 

For more advice on creating teams, you can find Unsliced on Amazon.

Mike Bausch is an industry leader whose restaurant, Andolini's Pizzeria, is a top ten pizzeria in the US, as named by TripAdvisor, BuzzFeed, CNN, and USA Today. Andolini's began in 2005 and has grown to five pizzerias, two gelaterias, two food hall concepts, a food truck, and a fine dining restaurant by 2019. Mike is a World Pizza Champion, a Guinness Book world record holder, and a writer for Pizza Today. Mike is part of a Marine Corps family who has lived across America from New York to California. Mike calls Tulsa home and lives with his wife, Michelle, and son, Henry.