How to make friends at work

We’re diving into a somewhat controversial topic today: friendships at work.?

Why is it a controversial topic? I think the main reason is that a lot of people like to build a wall between their professional and personal lives. Doing so is completely understandable. Yet, it can be difficult to navigate work without trusted friends to lean on — especially if they can understand the same organizational and systemic challenges you face in the workplace.

Before we dive too deep into this topic, I want to remind you all about my two principles when it comes to a person’s relationship with work. First, you should be able to dictate the type of relationship you have with work. Second, your work doesn’t have to make you miserable.

In other words, it’s completely within your right to decide that you don’t want to invest in friendships at work. I still encourage you to stick around to read what people have to say about the topic. Maybe they’ll be able to change your mind.

As for me, I like building friendships at work, but there is a caveat. I like having people I can turn to throughout my day and people who feel like they can turn to me. The idea is that we can vent to each other, chat about nonsense, troubleshoot problems, etc. The caveat is that everyone needs space from work from time to time. Building space into work friendships is important.

What do other people think? As I often do, I reached out to the LinkedIn community to find out about how they build and foster work friendships — especially in a hybrid world. While I can’t feature all of their comments, you can find them by clicking here.

Don’t fight natural friendships

“Many workers rely on spontaneity and proximity to build working friendships,” wrote Rob Kim, who is a career educator.

You should leave the proverbial door open to organic friendships. The beauty of these connections is that they can come from the least likely places. In my experience, sometimes the people who have the least in common on paper end up forming the strongest bonds.?

Don’t fight a connection if one starts popping up. Explore the connection, get to know the person and see what happens over the next several weeks or months. Maybe that relationship will blossom into a great friendship.

Create opportunities for friendships to blossom

The hybrid work environment can create serious obstacles when it comes to sparking work friendships. This is especially true for people who remotely onboarded at companies during the pandemic. They didn’t have a chance to meet people during orientations nor spontaneously in kitchenettes, the lunchroom, etc.

“Making friendships in a remote work environment takes more intentional effort, but it can be super rewarding,” wrote Anne Genduso, who is a career coach. “To make space for that important connection-building, build it right into your workweek.”

For example, she suggests setting up 30-minute coffee chats with different colleagues each week. You can also play virtual trivia with your team during lunch breaks. You can also start each meeting with a question to help people get to know each other.

We use the questions approach at LinkedIn. Whenever a person joins a team, they’re asked to introduce themselves and tell the group one thing that’s not on their LinkedIn profile. Often, it leads to some interesting conversations.

Similarly, Kim wrote that he organizes activities with his colleagues. “Take initiative to organize team-building exercises if your company doesn’t already organize them. I love facilitating CliftonStrengths for new staff as a way to get to know them.”

Be a good friend in return

The best piece of advice about building friendships inside or outside of the office is to be a good friend in return. You don’t want to be the person who only takes during any relationship.

“Finding out more about the other person and taking a genuine interest are key,” wrote Elise Stevens, who is a career tactician.

One of the best ways to know what to offer others from friendship is to define what you think is a good friend. Once you have that definition, you can evaluate whether you’re serving that purpose for people in your life.

“To have a friend means to share and to listen, to trust and be trusted, to feel safe and supported, and to be there for each other,” wrote Nelly V. Tacheva, who is a founder and CEO.

What’s your advice for building friendships at work? Join the conversation.

? What else do you need to know?

By Gianna Prudente, associate news editor for job searches and careers:

• Should you trust your gut? "Trust your gut." It's advice we've all been told one time or another when making a decision. Despite what sometimes feels like a leap of faith, following your intuition usually leads you down the right path. Why? Melody Wilding, an author and executive coach, writes in Harvard Business Review that the brain and gut work together to assess past events, personal needs and more to make "the wisest decision given the context." That's why trusting your gut can be helpful when making career decisions. Here’s what people are saying about it.
• Struggling to find purpose at work? The Great Reshuffle has caused millions of people to question what they want out of their careers. For many, the answer was clear: More meaningful, purpose-drive work. If you're in search of a more fulfilling career, author Ranjay Gulati has some advice, including that you need to identify what you want to achieve in your life to discover a personal purpose. You should also be intentional about the tasks you take on to bring more meaning into your role. Don’t forget to raise your hand for projects that closely align with your goals. Finally, surround yourself with "like-minded and uplifting" colleagues. Here’s what people are saying about the advice.
• How can you stay engaged while working remotely? Two years into remote work, people are missing the daily interactions with colleagues they had while working in person. As a result, they're feeling disconnected from their teams and companies, writes BBC Worklife, which is impacting overall well-being at work. To help colleagues stay connected while working from home, author Lisette Sutherland suggests companies create a newsletter, podcast or virtual town halls as a resource for information that "workers may have otherwise absorbed in the office." Here’s what people are saying about the advice.

? Invest in yourself

You will need to take at least one risk at some point in your career. Sometimes those risks don’t pay off. After all, that is the nature of risks. However, many risks are worth the gamble — especially if you put an emphasis on intelligent risks. This LinkedIn Learning course will teach you quite a bit about evaluating risks. You can watch the course below or by clicking here.

? Coming up…

We’ll be out with a special edition of #GetAhead in a couple of weeks looking at what companies are doing to keep top talent within their organizations. You won’t want to miss it!