How to make friends at work
We’re diving into a somewhat controversial topic today: friendships at work.?
Why is it a controversial topic? I think the main reason is that a lot of people like to build a wall between their professional and personal lives. Doing so is completely understandable. Yet, it can be difficult to navigate work without trusted friends to lean on — especially if they can understand the same organizational and systemic challenges you face in the workplace.
Before we dive too deep into this topic, I want to remind you all about my two principles when it comes to a person’s relationship with work. First, you should be able to dictate the type of relationship you have with work. Second, your work doesn’t have to make you miserable.
In other words, it’s completely within your right to decide that you don’t want to invest in friendships at work. I still encourage you to stick around to read what people have to say about the topic. Maybe they’ll be able to change your mind.
As for me, I like building friendships at work, but there is a caveat. I like having people I can turn to throughout my day and people who feel like they can turn to me. The idea is that we can vent to each other, chat about nonsense, troubleshoot problems, etc. The caveat is that everyone needs space from work from time to time. Building space into work friendships is important.
What do other people think? As I often do, I reached out to the LinkedIn community to find out about how they build and foster work friendships — especially in a hybrid world. While I can’t feature all of their comments, you can find them by clicking here.
Don’t fight natural friendships
“Many workers rely on spontaneity and proximity to build working friendships,” wrote Rob Kim, who is a career educator.
You should leave the proverbial door open to organic friendships. The beauty of these connections is that they can come from the least likely places. In my experience, sometimes the people who have the least in common on paper end up forming the strongest bonds.?
Don’t fight a connection if one starts popping up. Explore the connection, get to know the person and see what happens over the next several weeks or months. Maybe that relationship will blossom into a great friendship.
Create opportunities for friendships to blossom
The hybrid work environment can create serious obstacles when it comes to sparking work friendships. This is especially true for people who remotely onboarded at companies during the pandemic. They didn’t have a chance to meet people during orientations nor spontaneously in kitchenettes, the lunchroom, etc.
“Making friendships in a remote work environment takes more intentional effort, but it can be super rewarding,” wrote Anne Genduso, who is a career coach. “To make space for that important connection-building, build it right into your workweek.”
For example, she suggests setting up 30-minute coffee chats with different colleagues each week. You can also play virtual trivia with your team during lunch breaks. You can also start each meeting with a question to help people get to know each other.
We use the questions approach at LinkedIn. Whenever a person joins a team, they’re asked to introduce themselves and tell the group one thing that’s not on their LinkedIn profile. Often, it leads to some interesting conversations.
Similarly, Kim wrote that he organizes activities with his colleagues. “Take initiative to organize team-building exercises if your company doesn’t already organize them. I love facilitating CliftonStrengths for new staff as a way to get to know them.”
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Be a good friend in return
The best piece of advice about building friendships inside or outside of the office is to be a good friend in return. You don’t want to be the person who only takes during any relationship.
“Finding out more about the other person and taking a genuine interest are key,” wrote Elise Stevens, who is a career tactician.
One of the best ways to know what to offer others from friendship is to define what you think is a good friend. Once you have that definition, you can evaluate whether you’re serving that purpose for people in your life.
“To have a friend means to share and to listen, to trust and be trusted, to feel safe and supported, and to be there for each other,” wrote Nelly V. Tacheva, who is a founder and CEO.
What’s your advice for building friendships at work? Join the conversation.
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Retired Educator
2 年Many of my closest friends have come from two schools that I worked at for over forty years. We’ve traveled together, and spent many a day with their grandkids, children, and spouses. We’ve even consoled each other during family losses.
mechanical,hydraulic and computer diagnostician’s
2 年I have mixed emotions about this, I watch on the daily how beneficial being a friend can lessen the size of hammer you have to swing during the day. When work ethic is compromised and seniority and experience do not matter I do believe that this will affect overall quality of work and productivity. But I am old. What do I know? It’s a different environment in the work place these days.
Graphic Designer at IT
2 年https://www.fiverr.com/s2/bf52ea5ac2
Business English/Career Coach for Ambitious MGRs, Directors, & VPs who Speak English as a Second Language and are Ready to LEVEL UP | Job Interviews ?? | CVs/Resumes ??| Pronunciation ?? | 15+ Client Success Stories ??
2 年I think everything starts with showing respect to everyone — regardless of their position. A foundation built on this could possibly establish genuine friendships inside and outside of the workplace. Andrew Seaman
Area sales manager
2 年As someone who worked in large & small teams mangaged and been managed worked in remotely with just telephone communication, is take interest in everyone be inclusive encourage dialogue with all find subjects to talk about you would be suprised how many great conversations debate I’ve Thrown out to my colleagues and you would be shocked what you learn about people, I still talk to people I haven’t worked with for 20 years