How to Live a Life Worth Living After Graduation

4 Key Things I learned in four years since graduation

“Hard choices, easy life; Easy choices, hard life” - Jerzy Gregory

It was a Tuesday.

Mere months after starting my dream job in consulting, I walked into my quarterly review and told my Managing Director that this would be my last day.

No preparation. No next step. No pros and cons list.

Just a simple decision.

A decision that was catalyzed not by a notion of what I wanted, but rather initiated from a deep fear of whom I was becoming. I was drastically off course from living a life of purpose. And my subconscious knew it.

I walked out that day without a path forward. I was terrified. But I was simultaneously more energized than I could ever remember being.

“It's the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” - Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

What followed has been my story. Four years of decisions since college, both bad and good, that have culminated in a story that I’m proud to say I have had the honor to live.

It hasn’t been easy. Far from it. I’ve had more days than I care to admit that felt like I’d never find joy again.

But my daily purpose is to live life as a continual attempt to answer the question posited by the poet Mary Oliver,

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

My answer…live a life true to myself.

Here are a few things I’ve learned along the journey. I’m putting them out there in the hopes that they reach someone in the grips of making a big decision and that they may be that little nudge they need to take back the reins of their own lives and live life fully their own. Cheers.

1. Take Risks

Quit. Move. Ask. Ship. Start. Stop. Stay.

Whatever action makes you most uncomfortable is likely the one you should execute on. For most people, we are still more or less in the same job, city, and friend group that we’ve always been in. Nothing wrong with that, but it’s unlikely that you are growing exponentially by staying in the same place.

From my own experience, taking risks, both professionally and emotionally, have an immediate negative “dip” that you have to get through to get the pay-off on the other side. It is the dip, whether, in terms of salary, status, or discomfort, that is the single biggest killer of people living lives of purpose.

The dip is the journey. The journey is your story. Your story is your life.

Take back the director’s role in your life.

2. Think in terms of a story, not a resume

Think about your favorite movie or show. What makes it so engaging? Why has it been so impactful? What is the character that you most associate with?

Stories are engaging because the narrative involves characters battling “dips,” going through change, and taking a massive risk to reach a resolution.

If we are being honest, our lives would be terrible movies. They are linear narratives with the most exciting component being a vacation to get AWAY from the life you're living.

Early in my journey, I picked up Donald Miller’s “A Thousand Miles..eg”. It is a fascinating book that talks about looking at your life through the lens of a screenwriter. It was illuminating to think about life as a narrative. Would I pay to watch a movie about my life? What would make this story better? How could I create a compelling story that others would be excited to watch?

I realized that I had been living my life based on how easily it could be explained in a bullet point on a resume. How would a gap look? How could I explain this decision in an interview? Would taking that job make it easier to get the next one?

Living life as a bullet point is a sure fire way to live someone else's life.

Next time you are about to make a decision, instead of thinking in terms of bullet points, think about it in terms of a movie narrative. Which would make a more compelling story? What would make me feel more alive? What would the story be like after I do this and it works? Or if it doesn’t?

As Robert Greene says, “it’s all material.”

3. The Power Of Compound Interest

"My wealth has come from a combination of living in America, some lucky genes, and compound interest." – Warren Buffett

Investing earlier rather than later is better due to compounding interest. Most financially literate people understand that. But when it comes to other areas of life, we tend to overlook the power of compound interest.

For instance, young professionals move to a big city for a “few years” until they decide to raise a family and move somewhere else. Although this is a generally acceptable decision, what if you viewed it as an investment. Instead of consistently “investing” time in your future community, you “spend” the time in the city missing out on the incredible growth opportunities that come from early investing.

What if you consistently “invested” a penny today in what you are currently pushing off to the future instead of waiting?

The difference takes a while to see, but at the far outpoints the difference becomes stark.

4. Character is everything, guard it with your life

“Since we must live in a society and must depend on the opinion of others, there is nothing to be gained by neglecting your reputation. By not caring how you are perceived you let others decide this for you, be the master of your fate and also of your reputation.” — Oscar Wilde

Building a personal brand is all the rage right now. And for good reason. As technology continues to democratize information and education, who you are on paper will begin to matter less than who you are in the real world.

This doesn’t mean you need to desire to become a social media influencer or pay some charlatan peddling “personal brand” consultancy services. Personal brands have always been around they just used to be referred to as a different word: Character.

What character means to me is who you are and what you stand for in any situation. It is more about internal than external flaunting. It will direct you when you are making hard choices. It will guide you when the path is blurry. It will keep you going when nothing else will.

Take the time to look internally at who you are, truly, and whom you want to be. Notice the gap. And work tirelessly to close the gap.

We don’t need more Gary Vee’s, Kardashian's, or Slime stars. What we do need more of is men and women with rock solid characters willing to make the hard choices necessary to move the world forward.

Wrapping it Up

No matter where you are in your journey, I urge you to take the time and rethink your story up to today. Are you living a life that you’d love to tell people about? Are you inspired to spend the next 40 - 60 - 80 - 100 hours this week in your job? If not, what is holding you back?

I’ll finish this off with again asking the question posited by Mary Oliver:

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

Let me know your answer in the comments!