How to live and lead to 100: Five actions to embrace the gift of longevity

The following is a guest contribution written by Barbara Waxman MS, MPA, PCC . It does not necessarily reflect the views of Schurman Holdings LLC DBA The Super Age or any of its affiliated enterprises.

We are all leaders, every one of us. You lead your life through the rollercoaster of Covid; you may be leading multiple generations of your family, or leading a team or a company or a movement. Leadership, as I define it, is the ability to guide oneself and inspire others to act in the face of challenge and change, with clarity of mind, body, and spirit, to create good in the world. The Stanford Center on Longevity 's New Map of Life mission echoes that credo: to accelerate and implement scientific discoveries, behavioral practices, technological advances, and social norms so that century-long lives are healthy and rewarding.?

To get even more granular, it's helpful to understand that longevity is not simply a measure of the quantity of your years (lifespan) but also the quality, or healthspan, of those years. To that end, I've delved into the bank of knowledge I've acquired from a deep investment into fields adjacent to my own—neuroscience, mindfulness, positive psychology, bio-hacking and more—to create this list of the five most impactful actions you can take to embrace the demographic gift we've been given and continue to have the energy, focus, purpose, and connection to create a roadmap for your well-lived life.?

1. Choose Your Words Wisely ?

Words matter. Seemingly insignificant quips like "You can't teach an old dog new tricks," "Act your age," and a host of other expressions associate midlife with an initiation into inevitable decline. So when I refer to "adults midlife and better ," I almost always get a smile or chuckle in response. I've often noticed people take an unconscious breath of self-acceptance mixed with relief. To reframe aging and reclaim midlife as a period of growth and possibility, renaming is in order. If you name it, you can tame it.?

Middlescence describes the transition period midlifers experience gazing into future decades of the unknown. Until recently, midlife was culturally considered the beginning of our declining years. That made sense when there were a dozen years or more on the horizon. But life expectancy has expanded by more than 30 years in just the past century, giving us more time spent in the powerful years in the middle of life.?

Embrace Middlescence and speak its truth to better understand and appreciate it for the ripe, sometimes awkward, sometimes do-something-kind-of-crazy, often rich and enriching stage of life it is.?

2. Live According to Your Stage, Not Age?

I was recently catching up with a former coaching client. She was preparing to launch her son into his junior year of college and her daughter into her first year of high school; with years of paying for education in front of her, she knew she and her partner would need to keep working for the foreseeable future. I shared my latest news of looking towards becoming a grandmother—twice over—in 2023.?

Based on just this information, you likely assume I am older than my client. I am 60 and she is in her 70’s making that thought a reflection of an outdated mindset. The truth is that age is no longer an accurate indicator of life stage. The reality of longer lives translates into initiating different paths at different times. We are healthier than any other generation before, and if we understand how to cultivate our health and energy, anything is possible.

Release the chronological number you have always associated with your life’s progress and value. Your age no longer defines you. Live according to your stage of life—and thrive!?

3. Invest in Multi-Generational Relationships?

If the past few years have taught us anything, it's that we need one another. A sense of belonging is primal, and our innate need to be seen, heard, accepted, and appreciated is foundational. Unfortunately, with the spread of Covid, loneliness and isolation have reached epidemic proportions. According to the National Institute on Aging (NIA) , the health risks of prolonged isolation and loneliness are equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes daily - shortening a person's lifespan by as many as 15 years. That’s why generational diversity is more important than ever; it isn’t just a buzzword, but something that can have a real impact on your health and wellbeing.?

“The stakes couldn’t be higher. Prompted by the arrival of our profoundly multigenerational and multicultural future, we must choose between two paths forward — one characterized by scarcity, conflict and loneliness; the other by abundance, interdependence and connection.”?— Marc Freedman , CEO and founder, CoGenerate

Bringing generations together is essential to making your life more joyous, colorful, and connected. Personally, my life has been touched by my mother's octogenarian friend, Hannah, as well as some wise counsel by companions in their 20s, 30s, and 40s. I can't imagine my life would be nearly as rich or as vital if not for the diversity of generations I cultivate as friends, colleagues, and partners. Research backs this up. According to a 2022 study commissioned by CoGenerate , there is a hunger for working across generations; younger people want mentorship, while more experienced people want collaboration.??

Instead of feeding ageist tropes separating us into numerical categories, unleash your power and potential by being open to people of all ages and backgrounds.

4. Ditch Retirement for Preferment?

The concept of retirement was popularized around the time Social Security was enacted, when life expectancy in the US was about 58 for men and 62 for women. The problem is that the number 65 has stuck in our cultural psyche, all while our life expectancy increased dramatically, making this an unrealistic milestone for many.?

It's time to retire the word "retirement" and trade it for a more appropriate, positive term: preferment. Unlike retirement, preferment implies designing your own course of action. Rather than planning for a withdrawal from work, preferment reflects a frame of mind in which you make a course correction towards things you prefer more—even if having an income is still a requirement.?

Buck preconceived notions and follow a path that fuels your passion and meets your financial, emotional, social, and physical needs.?

5. Align Your Lifespan and Healthspan?

Given that five of the seven leading causes of death in the US can be attributed to chronic, lifestyle-related conditions, it’s no surprise we are all familiar with the concept of preventative care. That’s why a burgeoning medical specialization known as Lifestyle Medicine has been steadily gaining traction in the medical community.?

Both the New Map of Life and my formula for a life well-lived share an understanding that longevity is not simply a measure of the quantity of years (or lifespan), but the quality or healthspan of those years. Lifestyle medicine recognizes that your physical health, emotional well-being, and the accumulated effect of your daily lifestyle choices are inextricably linked.

Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu once said, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." When you follow these steps and begin to embrace your demographic gift instead of limiting yourself based on your chronological age, you can become a more impactful, purposeful leader in any domain - all the way to 100.??

Transform your lifestyle to focus on cultivating a mindset and energy focused on improving the quality of your healthspan, not just elongating your lifespan.

Barbara Waxman MS, MPA, PCC is the founder of Odyssey Group Coaching LLC . She is an aging advocate who helped define the life stage Middlescence . She is passionate about building leaders’ personal and professional skills so they can thrive while maximizing their effectiveness in the face of change and complexity. Her leadership in the coaching field has culminated in the transformative coaching model, Entrepreneurship Turned Inward?, and her science-based Five Essential Elements? process .? Barbara serves as an Advisor to both the Stanford Center on Longevity and Stanford Lifestyle Medicine , as well as a faculty member at Chip Conley ’s Modern Elder Academy, and an angel investor in the aging and longevity space.