How to Be a Leader without Being a Jerk
For the next few months, I'm returning to the ways things were when I launched this newsletter, when each issue included a short video, along with a brief written explanation. My motivation is to take a deep dive into what it means to be a leader without being a jerk.
The Basic Idea: In our culture, many people equate strength with effectiveness; they believe that the opposite is also true. That is, if you are kind and compassionate, you must be weak. In reality, this is a flawed way of thinking. Strength doesn't mean a leader has good judgment. Compassion doesn't mean they lack grit, tenacity or wisdom. Leading without being a jerk means that you are a decent human being in addition to being an effective leader.
A Bit More Background: To lead a large organization, you must be able to find, recruit, manage and motivate talented individuals. You must also be able to unite them as a cohesive team that is pursuing a shared vision.
The sports world, for example, is filled with teams that were packed with talent, but that we don't remember because they lost despite their talent. That's a sign of a lack of leadership.
In a similar manner, a lot of mediocre businesses are led by an intimating leader who produces poor business results. Just because you are scared of someone does not mean they will bring out the best in you; to the contrary, the more afraid any of us are, the harder it is to think clearly.
In the Jerk or Not debate, the choice is between:
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Talented leaders know how to relate to others, as well as how to be relatable. They are capable of empathy and understanding; this is a very good thing, because these qualities make it easier to understand the reality of a situation.
I am fully aware that some leaders act like jerks and still produce good business results. I am also aware that very few people have what it takes to act like a jerk and still be an effective leader.
For the vast majority of us, effective leadership means steering far, far away from jerk territory.
Question of the Week: How big a problem is this? Have you encountered many leaders who behave like jerks?
Next week: I'll talk about what great leadership looks like.
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Owner & Designer | Boutique Closets & Badass Garages | Closets & Storage Industry Leader: Connection & Community | ASID Affiliate | PWB Member | GSABA Member
1 个月In my retail career, I have always had great experiences with great leaders. However, moving into my current industry, not so much. ?
Speak Truth to Power
2 个月Even jerks have to come from s good place. My favorite part of The Last Dance is when someone suggested Michael Jordan behaved like a tyrant. He was none too pleased. He got the best out of everyone he played with and "If you don't like it, you probably never won anything."
Owner of Bro Saeed Consulting LLC; dedicated to educating and engaging diverse communities through Da'wah
2 个月Great advice. I think you have a typo here: "a lot of mediocre businesses are led by an intimating leader". I believe what you meant to say was intimidating.
Avid Listener | Chaste Conversationalist | Prudent Mentor
2 个月Very aptly captured characteristics of a person who considers himself to be a leader and earns contempt from others in lieu of respect, Bruce Kasanoff. Firstly, they do not deserve to be called leaders, they are just bosses who are victims of inferiority complex, and grown their way up yearning to show bossism through their psuedo-superiority attitude, not leadership. Ironically, they deliver results, and therefore the senior management tolerates them being jerks to their team.
Empowering Change | Thought Partner for Clarity, Confidence & Direction
2 个月Great post