How to Lead without Losing Yourself and Achieve Success without Compromise...

How to Lead without Losing Yourself

Earlier this week, I kicked off the first of my mentee conversations as part of the Future Leaders Programme with IoD Glass Ceiling Group IoD Emerging NEDs and Generation 2030 UK . One of the mentees asked, "How do I achieve success?" I responded, “You are your greatest asset.” Get to know yourself well and focus on the key things within your control and influence to create the ‘perfect’ environment for achieving the success you seek.

Mentee Conversations and the Essence of Self-Leadership

We discussed how he was the same person, whether working at home or in the office, and explored what about the office environment led to his success. We then created a plan for him to replicate that success while working at home. At its essence, this is self-leadership – the ability to optimise any situation to make it work for you. This power resides within you to make choices every moment of every day; you don’t need anything external to make it happen.

Andrew Bryant, CSP describes self-leadership as “the practice of intentionally influencing your thinking, feeling, and actions towards your objectives.”

It’s about taking responsibility and ownership of oneself through self-knowledge and self-awareness.

The Media’s Message and Self-Doubt

In a world quick to tell you what you lack or what’s wrong with you, it’s easy to become conflicted and second-guess yourself. Last weekend, an article popped into my newsfeed with the hook – “8 behaviours that show someone is broken inside.” On a bad day, I might have wondered if ticking all those behaviours meant I was broken. But I’m no more broken than anyone else. That’s not to say I don’t break. Of course, I do – I’m not infallible. A couple of weeks ago, at a big meeting, I was side-swiped by a fellow ‘peer’. I chose to respond rather than react, understanding it was about her, not me. This choice is the essence of self-leadership.

With the barrage of media telling you what’s wrong with you and what you need, it’s easy to lose yourself. This is even more pronounced in leadership, where the expectation and pressure is to ‘perform’. It’s little wonder my mentee’s next question was, “Is there a wrong and a right way?”

Your Way is the Right Way

No, there’s only your way. To be authentic, resilient, and unbreakable in a world that keeps demanding more, you must recognise that there’s no wrong or right way – only your way. Being someone else leads to a disconnect, feels like pushing water uphill with a rake, and creates nothing but stress and exhaustion. As Gandhi said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world."

At this year’s CIPD Festival of Work, Alex Mahon, CEO of Channel 4, emphasised the need for CEOs to role model for others. We need to demonstrate how to take control in an uncontrollable world and be masters of our own destiny.

Origins and Influences

The concept of self-leadership originates from the work of Charles Manz, who emphasised the importance of self-influence and personal responsibility. This idea is echoed in Guy Kawasaki 'Enchantment,' where the focus is on empowerment and creating a lasting impact. Self-leadership involves empowerment, productivity, self-awareness, resilience, motivation, and decision-making.

I was asked earlier this week how I maintain my authenticity as a leader. The answer is by being true to my values, transparent, open, accountable, and responsible. Through thick and thin, if you feel yourself wobble, build the infrastructure to support yourself. After all, you need to nurture the heart (i.e., yourself) first if it is to supply blood to its vital organs (i.e., others).

Navigating Crisis with Self-Leadership

Self-leadership is crucial when navigating crises where the end goal isn’t visible. You must be self-reliant, with motivation driven by a deep sense of purpose and meaning. Ensure you and your community are heard, draw upon your innate strengths, and what truly brings you alive and keep taking steps forward. But remember... to pause... you are 'allowed'... in fact it is essential you do.

"In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity." – Sun Tzu

Self-Leadership within #ProjectMe

#ProjectMe was born out of navigating profound life transitions, including the loss of my husband, health, and career. It's a transformative framework designed to empower leaders to take control in an uncontrollable world, navigate change, and achieve success without compromise. By focusing on self-awareness and self-leadership, #ProjectMe helps you build resilience, enhance your personal and professional growth, and ultimately become unbreakable.

"You are not nothing, and that is a very good place to start."

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#SelfLeadership #ProjectMe #SelfLeaderMe

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Join Us for More Insightful Discussions and Practical Strategies

To explore these topics and more, join us at the upcoming events:

• #ProjectMe Radio Show: In conversation with David Howell about "Harnessing Our Innate Talents". this Sunday, 16th June, 2024 @ 6pm (BST). Listen in here .
• Are You Truly Living?: LinkedIn Live on "Mastering the Art of Letting Go: From Burden to Breakthrough" with Daniel Glyde , Mark Carolan and myself, Laura Toop Thursday, 27th June, 2024 @ 6.30 pm (BST) Set your reminder here .
• #MeMoments Cafe: "Reclaiming Control: Strategies for Success without Compromise". Happening on Wednesday, 3rd July 2024. Reserve your spot here.

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"You are not nothing, and that is a very good place to start. Become unbreakable. Achieve success without compromise. Flourish."