How to Lead: With or Without Labels
There are 30,000+ so-called leadership “experts” out there.
More than 300,000+ books have been written on the subject.
More than 300+ million speeches have been delivered.
The vast majority are filled with inconsequential, worthless crap.
You don’t need to attend many “leadership” seminars populated by multitudes of hipsters and posers or visit many boardrooms stuffed with empty suits and heartless sharks and find real-life robots who can recite word-for-word the need for everyone in any organization to:
a) “Think Outside the Box”
b) “Work Smarter, Not Harder”
c) “Be a Team Player”
They make it sound as simple as ABC.
Looks like just about anyone can snort and rhyme off well-worn motivational cocaine lines from Jim Collins, Tony Robbins, Stephen Covey or the 29,997+ others. Merely by repeating what the so-called “experts” have told them, thousands of well-dressed, well-educated private and public-sector knuckleheads take comfort and pat themselves on the back each week because they have now have the ability and confidence (along with the certification to prove it) to think and speak in terms of “win-win, data-driven paradigms that create leading edge, synergistic solutions while focusing on big picture strategy, value-added deliverables, core competencies, R.O.I. and making sure every opinion counts”.
With little to say of any real value, thousands of highly-paid graduates from the Michael Scott School of Corporate Behaviour (where there is “No I in Team”) routinely recycle and regurgitate leadership and management consulting clichés, such as this gem; copied and pasted word for meaningless word:
Successful, impactful leaders in the workplace have similar mindsets; focused not only on the success of their employees, but also on how they can make themselves better leaders. One way a continuous-improvement mindset can be encouraged is through development initiatives focused on feedback. Encouraging continuous, spontaneous, and frequent feedback from multiple, meaningful sources (e.g., incumbents, customers, and senior leaders) can make leaders aware of areas for improvement and strengths to leverage.
Have you run into enough of your share of delusional people in high-level positions who actually speak like that?
This is precisely why Dilbert and Dunder-Mifflin exist.
When words and phrases thought to be leadership gospel are overused to the point of absurdity and become punchlines for the stuff of sitcoms and cartoons, where does that leave the rest of us?
Where do we as common, everyday people – slugging it out daily on the dirt road to reinvention – search to find examples of what real uncommon leadership looks and more importantly, feels like?
Eight days ago, the Pittsburgh Penguins won their third Stanley Cup title in eight years and team captain Sidney Crosby played a huge role in the six-game conquest over Nashville. With 27 points in 23 games, he captured his second straight Conn Smythe Trophy as playoff MVP. But, Sid the Kid from Cole Harbour, Nova Scotia is a worthy and honorable leader for reasons beyond on-ice production and exploits; intangibles that are not always obvious.
If the game of ice hockey can be used as a metaphor for life, what if we can detect “little things” that make a huge difference for anyone who is called to lead at work or at home.
DATELINE: NASHVILLE, TN: June 11, 2017
When Sidney Crosby grabbed the Stanley Cup from the greasy, well-oiled palms of NHL commissioner Gary Bettman, the Pittsburgh captain skated around in triumph before handing it over to a 36-year-old journeyman defenseman to raise over his head.
Unlike “Sid the Kid,” Ron Hainsey is far from a household name. But, he was the Penguins player who had played the most NHL games without a playoff appearance until this spring’s Cup run with a star-studded Pittsburgh line-up led by Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, Chris Kunitz and others. With previous NHL stops in Montreal, Columbus, Atlanta, Winnipeg, Carolina and minor-league tours in Quebec and Hamilton, Hainsey is one of those well-traveled, unheralded, anonymous foot soldiers who do a lot of the grunt work away from the spotlight as the supporting cast for superstars like Crosby, Malkin and the rest.
Five teams, 14 seasons, and 907 regular-season games later, Hainsey found himself in the Stanley Cup playoffs for the first time in his career. No other NHL player had ever suited up for more regular season hockey without getting a taste of playoff action.
Even the most die-hard hockey fans may not fully appreciate the Crosby-Hainsey moment in Game 6 for what it truly represents.
For Crosby, handing the Cup over to Hainsey was a gesture that spoke volumes about the “little things” that capture what real leadership is all about – and why Sid is revered as the Penguins captain in the first place. It symbolizes a level of thoughtfulness and how certain small gestures can mean big things to others. Crosby knows full well how hard it is to not only make the NHL playoffs, but survive four punishing rounds of post-season play and earn the honor of hosting hockey’s holy grail.
CROSBY LEADERSHIP LESSON #1:
As the Ron Hainsey story demonstrates, reflect on how you could show appreciation for those closest to you who never get their fair share of accolades for their countless hours of hard, unglamorous work. How can you shine the spotlight on others for what they do in the trenches to make you shine?
CROSBY LEADERSHIP LESSON #2:
Real leadership doesn’t come from having a special talent, lengthy tenure and a title like “captain” or by making stirring locker room speeches. Real leadership is revealed by how we actually Think About and Act Towards others in split-second, day-to-day moments through the endless seasons of life. As Crosby demonstrated through his actions – and not just words – it’s about being fully aware and present in the here-and-now. Not getting caught up in the hoopla and pandemonium of the Penguins Cup victory and staying mindful of his teammates and what’s truly important.
CROSBY LEADERSHIP LESSON #3:
Humility is the cornerstone of leadership.
Even more so in moments of triumph.
But, you don’t need to look to all-time greats and three-time Stanley Cup champions like Sidney Crosby to see real leadership in action.
If you watch closely and pay attention, you can see and learn real leadership lessons from hockey players as young as 9-years old. Like the real-life story that unfolded more than two decades ago in a small town on Canada’s east coast.
DATELINE: RIVERVIEW, NB: March 21, 1993
For close to 30 years, the game of ice hockey has engulfed me both personally and professionally. There was a considerable stretch in the 80’s and 90’s that saw me behind the microphone, calling over 1,000 games of play-by-play for American Hockey League affiliates of the NHL’s Calgary Flames, Boston Bruins, Winnipeg Jets and Edmonton Oilers. And another dozen years or more was spent in small town rinks, behind the bench and coaching close to 500 kids of all ages through minor hockey programs in my old hometown.
This is where some of life’s greatest lessons in leadership are frozen forever in the memory of a grateful coach who was there to see it happen.
To this very day, I am even more convinced that every team – every office, every committee, every workplace, every home, every family – needs leaders like Josh.
He was a blonde, blue-eyed, and some would say choppy-skating defenceman who toiled with the now legendary Riverview Senators back in the early 90’s. You can find Josh seated in the front row of the team pic, second from right.
Josh was what you would call a “nice kid”. Polite and well-mannered to a fault. While his hockey skills could be charitably classified as “adequate”, he more than compensated through hard-work and a cheery, “just happy to be here” attitude. So while he may not have been the best player and may have cost us the odd game or two, there are much more important issues than winning games when you’re competing at the novice level in minor hockey . And the coach of that Senators squad saw it as his role to instill certain values and principles in his players that extended far beyond how to break out of your own zone, do crossovers or properly execute a tape-to-tape forward pass. Over the course of about a dozen years behind minor hockey benches, this coach had developed a “3-RULES” philosophy he hoped would serve Josh and all the kids well:
RULE #1. No matter the score, Senators don’t give up. Ever.
RULE #2. No Senator ever criticizes a team-mate. Ever.
RULE #3. Everyone will play – regardless of score and situation. Everyone.
The third guideline took some getting used to for some parents but once explained, the vast majority always understood. The way the coach looked at it, if the Senators were down by a goal with a minute to play and someone like Josh was up next, then he was the one getting the next shift. Parents and players all knew going in that no kid would lose any ice time just so a so-called “star players” could take an extra shift or two in hopes of scoring a tying goal.
The way the coach saw it, giving 8 and 9-year old kids equal opportunity to learn, make mistakes, grow and acquire skills and confidence took priority over merely winning and losing hockey games.
And in March of ’93, the Senators are battling arch rival Dieppe Voyageurs in a late-season game that held great importance at the time. Late in the third period – Sens are down by a goal – the action is fast and furious, up and down the ice.
Just over a minute remaining, the play is deep in our own end. One of the Senators newer players, Adam, has the puck behind the net. Adam has been coached many times on what to do in this situation but, in the heat of battle… he panics.
Adam sends a pass directly up the middle of the Senators own zone.
As you can probably guess with stunning accuracy, the puck is intercepted by the dreaded Voyageurs who promptly bury it behind a stunned Wally Fowler guarding the Riverview cage.
“DAMN!”. (Followed by a few choice expletives under one’s breath).
Dieppe up by two with less than a minute to go.
Air escapes from the Senators balloon – both on and off the ice.
“Game over in River City”.
Even an eternal optimist like the Senators head coach knows there’s not enough time on the clock to come back from a two-goal deficit. And everyone else in the building knows it as well. The Voyageurs are high-fiving and celebrating and in that instant the coach knows how important it is to maintain composure and play hard to the end. (See RULE #1). Walking towards the defencemen side of our bench, the coach notices Adam as he is heading off the ice, skating wearily toward the door.
The non-verbals say it all.
Head bowed. Shoulders hunched.
And you can see it in Adam’s face that he is visibly upset, knowing his miscue had just cost his team any chance of coming back. Fighting back his emotions, Adam looks he just wants to curl up and hide somewhere under a rock.
Watching this human drama unfold, the coach’s thoughts are racing.
“Gotta be careful and say exactly the right thing so as not to upset Adam’s already delicate psyche. I mean one ill-advised word and this emotionally-fragile kid is going to be turning on the tear tap. Who knows how many years of psychotherapy he might require to recover from the damage inflicted by his minor hockey coach? But, as his coach, Adam needs to realize what has happened and forever learns the lesson afforded by this teachable moment. Just need to come up with the right words”.
As the coach is strolling over while collecting his thoughts, Adam comes through the door at the Sens bench only to be greeted by Josh who is now standing, getting ready to take his place on the shift change.
And 9-year-old Josh utters words that have been etched in a memory forever.
“Don’t worry about it Adam. It’s OK. We all make mistakes. Coach just wants us to do better the next time”.
And just like that, Josh nonchalantly skates away to take his place on the blue line for the upcoming face off.
Adam nods and takes his seat. Looks slightly relieved. Like part of the weight has been lifted.
Coach is left speechless.
Slowly and silently, he turns away from Adam, walking back to the other side of the bench.
Nothing more need be said.
Within the next thirty seconds or so, the coach allows a smile while mentally patting himself on the back.
“Hey some of this coaching must have rubbed off. I must be a crackerjack coach for Josh to be able apply RULE # 2. Never criticize a team-mate”.
And for about a decade, that’s the story this coach told himself. That he was the next Scotty Bowman, Pat Riley and Vince Lombardi, all rolled up into one.
Until one day, after a long overdue “comeuppance” and personal setback, the coach stared into a metaphorical mirror, mirror on the wall and plainly saw he was far from the fairest of them all. No longer wrapped up in his own ego and telling himself what a great coach he was, it finally began to dawn on him what had really taken place that day back in March of ’93.
He hadn’t taught Josh a thing.
The 9-year-old had been doing the teaching all along.
With a single phrase.
“Don’t worry about it Adam. It’s OK. We all make mistakes”
Reflecting on what had really happened in that Riverview arena, the coach finally recognized multiple lessons from the way a 9-year-old reacted in a pressure situation.
You see, Josh was just that kind of kid.
Always respectful, well-mannered; brought up by Doug and Marie to look you in the eye when he shook your hand. Josh would later excel at his chosen sport, basketball, playing at the national collegiate level while earning academic honours and many accolades along the way. Eventually he would graduate from Lambton College and Mount Allison University with a doctorate in English before becoming a university professor and father of three. As it turns out, Josh Prescott had been preparing to be a teacher his whole life and there is still a lot to be learned from his exchange on the bench with Adam.
PRESCOTT LEADERSHIP LESSON #1:
For openers, Josh didn’t point fingers.
You know yourself that when things go wrong (as they inevitably do), what is the standard human response? But, how much more difficult is it to restrain yourself from throwing those verbal daggers when you’re in the thick of an ultra-competitive situation, intensified by the roar of screaming fans? How many of us at the age of 36, 46 or 56 can resist the natural, human urge to wield the knife of blame when our team-mates – at work or at home – screw up?
What can you do - beginning this week - to overcome the knee-jerk reaction to throw a teammate under the bus?
PRESCOTT LEADERSHIP LESSON #2:
Josh took it upon himself to restore a shattered team-mates confidence.
What he really said to Adam with that one gesture is “Hey your slate is clean”.
Can you think of the last time one of your team-mates – at work or at home – had the courage to show confidence in you during those moments, when deep down, you knew you plain blew it, dropped the ball or even f**ked up royally? But, it’s hardly fair to ask for things we’re not prepared to give, so ask yourself these questions:
When was the last time you helped restore someone’s confidence? When was the last time you cleaned the slate for somebody who needed it wiped clean?
When the chips were down – on something truly more important that winning or losing – it was Josh who stood up. Isn’t that interesting? One of the so-called lesser players who may have been a little short on talent; the kid without a without the title, label or the "C" on his jersey – is the one who steps up in a huge way, saying what needs to be said.
PRESCOTT LEADERSHIP LESSON #3:
Could the actions of a remarkable 9-year-old in a long-forgotten game of novice-level ice hockey reveal what it takes to be a leader in any organization or within any family?
Most people see leadership as the act of leading others, but only when they have been bestowed an official title like team captain, CEO, regional director or senior vice-president. Or when they've been elected as POTUS, shop steward, district director of the home and school or the local tenants association at Del Boca Vista.
But, what if real leadership is really just the simple act of leading ourselves?
And how we Think About and Act Towards others?
With or without any labels.
Without the urge to acquire more certifications or hide behind fancy-schmancy corporate lingo.
Or, feeling the need to attend yet another leadership seminar and read yet another book from so-called experts.
Is there a way for you to rise above what is considered a “normal” response in pressure situations? Can you ignore hair-trigger human tendencies to assign blame, play the victim or act in a selfish, egocentric manner?
Hopefully, there are some ideas and insights you can adapt and learn on what real leadership looks and feels like from a couple of Canadian kids named Josh and Sid as you strive to re-create and re-imaginate the business, the career and the life you deserve.
“Whether you are trying to learn in hockey or trying to learn in life, I’ve always tried to be observant and tried to learn more, tried to evolve whether it’s as a hockey player or a person. With each year, I try to do that” SIDNEY CROSBY
p.s.... In the wake of a third Stanley Cup win, it's fascinating to look back at Sidney Crosby as a 14-year old and see how much the qualities of leadership and personal accountability were part of his DNA.
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7 年Wow, Gair, you are in the know!. Great article,as usual from your great abilbity
Cyber Security CEO | Media Personality | Award Winning Speaker | Best Selling Author
7 年Great article Gair, thanks for sharing!!